Should masturbation be taught at school?

I never believed much in sex ed, and how certain people coughs "queer activists" coughs have been using it as a way to spread their weird grooming to children, I wouldn't be letting my kid go to sex ed at all. All the really necessary things, like how reproduction works, is already taught in biology or life science.

I think its enough to give a nod to it, say it's normal and healthy to touch yourself, as part of the sex education curriculum, but I would feel very uncomfortable about any more detail than that.

This.

Given what we're currently dealing with in terms of lobby groups sending dodgy information into schools, I would be very cautious about anything more explicit. I would worry that the link between 'good porn' and masturbation would be the very next subject introduced, possibly by a nice, friendly 'charity' more than happy to send a chap in to do the educating. Also, see Warwickshire etc.

"What's in your pants belongs only to you" said the NSPCC. But here's a person to show you what to actually do inside your own pants. I mean what are they going to do, show videos, describe a wank, demonstrate, what?? Poor teachers.

Having said that, I read the article and I do agree there could be better education on the existence of female sexual pleasure seeing as how porn seems to be teaching young men that young women crying and being hurt during sex is fine and they are just objects to spunk into/on. I'm not sure boys need a whole lot of explict teaching on wanking - perhaps more on the old-fashioned concept of giving a female sexual pleasure.

The WHO is suggesting that 0-4 year olds need to be taught this.

mobile.twitter.com/PrisonPlanet/status/1255529333931888650

I don't think human sexuality can be taught without mentioning masturbation. It is a bit unfortunate that we've gotten to the point where schools are needing to do parents' jobs, but if they're going to, presenting human sexuality without the concept of masturbation would be inaccurate.

I thought it was covered in sex ed. I tthink children should be taught that it is normal, but that's about it.

I think talking about it being normal/healthy and a safe way to experiment is worthwhile. As a teacher (and I'm a biology teacher, so I do teach sex-ed type stuff sometimes) I think I'd be really uncomfortable with anything more than that. The problem is, it's hard to say something like that to a class and just move on. They will have questions and different beliefs and I think I'd find that quite a tricky discussion to manage.

I think boys are given lots of messages e.g. by the media that it's normal to masturbate, whereas girls aren't, and I do think that's something I'd need to combat.

I understand it's not really about my comfort, but equally teachers often lack training in teaching sex-ed or any PSHE topics, really. I think sometimes teachers with limited training/information can do more harm than good, and often the way sex-ed is taught in schools is really disjointed. Biology teaches some stuff, other stuff is taught in PSHE, parts of it are covered by the RE curriculum and so on!

It would be great if all teachers got proper training about teaching sex-ed and it was delivered in a formal, joined up way.

I do think a lot of stuff is taught too late in schools. I teach about contraception in Y10 (this is partly due to where it falls on the GCSE curriculum), but students in my school only get the chance to have a talk from a Brooke sexual health nurse in Y11, when they are 15/16. Personally, I think that's too late, and they need more input around 13/14.

BOgglegoghles about Katy having to use a state school when they use a private school.

Well perhaps you should have thought of that before having children. You can’t even earn enough to provide for your children yet you presume to dictate the way a free service should be provided?

That was rude! State schools are not free and how dare you say that parents who use state schools are not providing for their children. How about, since you don’t even send your kids to state schools you stop telling parents who do what a state school should or should not teach? And in return, we won’t dictate to you what your private school should teach your kids.

I think its enough to give a nod to it, say it's normal and healthy to touch yourself, as part of the sex education curriculum, but I would feel very uncomfortable about any more detail than that.

It's like that story on social media a while back where a mum had left her sex aid (strap on) out, left it drying, and when questioned by child said yes it was for having sex with her partner. Applauded for her open attitude. I found that weirdly boundary crossing.

Generalities yes, specifics nope. Yes people do it. Nope I won't say how I do it.

Yes, it's more how it is taught that is the issue. I am raising my kids in Norway and here they use a tv series as a starting off point for sex education for 10 year olds.

It's pretty graphic, but all matter of fact.

Worth taking a look to see how other countries approach the issue, there is a language barrier, but I think most people watching should get the gist.

This is the last episode which is about sex and that:

tv.nrk.no/serie/newton-pubertet/sesong/1/episode/8/avspiller

I think it absolutely should. This is a rule of feminism practically.

This article is about the views of an Australian controversial sex writer who isn't anti-porn.

That tells me all I need to know thanks.

If in doubt do check out Respect Yourself sextionary on the website. It's most informative.

Propertyofhood - totally agree.

Tiresiasmum - spot on.

I had a very early puberty and had no idea what was happening to me. I had feelings that made me want to masturbate but felt abnormal for having them (and being the only girl in school who had periods and breasts).

I was the perfect target for grooming. I admit I was probably an unusual case due to my age, but if I'd known what masturbation was and that it was normal, my abuser would never have been able to manipulate me as he did by taking advantage of my new physical urges.

Not every girl masturbates but I'd bet the majority do. My friends in school took several years to catch up but most in my group did.

I don't think girls need to be taught techniques just that if they do it it's normal. My daughter found my vibrator when she was 13. I walked in to catch her examining it curiously (I was glad I'd gone for something pretty and not phallic). I asked her if she knew what it was expecting her not to know while frantically trying to think up an excuse for what it was, but she did. We had a frank conversation about masturbation. She told me her friends discussed masturbation openly so finding my vibe (I was single at that point) wasn't a surprise.

My sister was adamant that my niece knew nothing about sex or masturbation at 14 but my daughter told me her cousin was known as the girl to go to for answers about sex. I think a lot of parents are in denial about how quickly the playground grapevine works when it comes to sex. You'd think most would prefer their kids to know the truth about masturbation rather than some flat-earther rubbish about hairy palms!

Of course it should be. It's part of sexual health, well being and is connected to body confidence and assertiveness within relationships. There is too much shame attached to this topic and given most teenagers will be exploring their bodies on their own the sooner the shame around this can be dismissed the better for them.

I definitely think that sexual education needs to be more in depth and taught from an earlier age than 15!
I definitely think that girls especially need to be told that masterbation is normal and that it's good to know your body.
I'm sure there are thousands of women out there who have never had an orgasm because they think it's a man's job to give them one. How will a man ever know what she likes, if she doesn't know?
I think that more emphasis should be placed on safe sex and ways to access contraception and places to get tested. I think that its vital that children have a safe place to go to talk about these things as parents are not always proactive at teaching their kids about these things or find them embarrassing.
I also agree that this is part and parcel of safeguarding against child sexual exploitation CSE. Because a lesson or a session with a safe confidential environment can open dialogue to explose unhealthy sexual behaviours or potential abuse.

When I was growing up my mother was very open about sex, body developing and hormones. I knew all about the mechanics by 10 due to early periods. By the time I was 14 my mum gave me a book with more information and encouraged me to get to know my body. It was more about me understanding my body and knowing it was healthy rather than sex or masterbation. But that followed naturally on my own prerogative. When I talked to friends about it, they said I was disgusting and that only a boy should touch you down there etc. I used to get confused. But now as an adult it helps me to understand why there are women with such unhealthy attitudes towards their bodies and sex. We live in a world where feminism is a thing... why should we allow this myth that knowing your body is wrong or dirty?

I don't know how to discuss porn, which is basically a masturbation aid, without talking about masturbation?

I think it should be taught in schools and maybe eventually, it will remove the general prudery that affects the British public. I also feel schools know best.

I have no idea but I think if it was 'taught', there might be several kids who worry because they've never done it! I never did.

Merely teaching that masturbation is normal, is OK, I think.

Also, state education isn’t free. It’s paid for through taxation. It is not a charity it is a state body and as such should be critiqued by the public.

Schools should provide safeguarding for children.

They shouldn’t teach them how to masturbate. That’s something people learn for themselves.

I think that children (well girls really, let's be honest) need to be taught that masturbation is totally normal and everyone does it. Boys don't need this really do they, they are almost proud of their wanking!

I HAD to pop in here just to say, no, everyone does not do it. It's a cultural thing. As a teenager (I was born 1951) I had never heard of girls masturbating, never did it, never had the urge, never had the urge as an adult. I'm pretty sure none of my (female, teenage) friends did it either, as they would have said so -- we talked about everything, I knew when and with whom the lost their virginity etc. I thought only boys masturbated.

As I said, it's a cultural thing. If we are told it's what everyone does and it's fantastic, of course most people will get curious and try it. But you don't have to.

Basically I agree with this:

Secondly, I do not agree to any adult outside my home - essentially a stranger to me- opening up a dialogue about masturbation or sex or personal/intimate development with my child, especially when I am not present. It blurs the boundaries of appropriateness. I don’t care if they are a teacher, doctor, school counsellor, have a working with children check etc that all means nothing to me when it comes to the safety of my child.

I think that children (well girls really, let's be honest) need to be taught that masturbation is totally normal and everyone does it. Boys don't need this really do they, they are almost proud of their wanking!

However, kids do not need to be taught how or anything like that do they? That's the point of masturbation isn't it, that you have fun figuring it out for yourself!

Peter Tatchell is all over this 'teaching children how to masturbate' thing as well isn't he? Urgh.

Thanks @HIVpos that’s quite interesting. I didn’t realise that gonohrea had boomed but I suppose it’s quite obvious why.

@BogglesGoggles here you go - assets.publishing.service.gov.uk/government/uploads/system/uploads/attachment_data/file/806118/hpr1919_stis-ncsp_ann18.pdf

Gonorrhoea and syphilis are the 2 STIs that are on the increase more than others. There’s a bit on page 12 about young people and STIs.

Sex Ed in schools, as well as teaching about safe sex, can also signpost to testing services, how someone can get tested for example, whether by going to a clinic, or by doing a self taken postal test. This way young people can learn that their privacy will be assured and the way it is taught can help to reduce stigma which prevents some people from getting tested.