‘I have a handbag therefore I am a woman’

I now look like my mum.

That’s actually a bit shitty as she was drop dead gorgeous when she was young (modelled) and I looked nothing like her.

She was poorly from middle age and looked it. I now look like her when she was 70.

When I catch sight of myself in a mirror, I'm reminded of my mother and as I'm not in contact with her it's a bit of a shock. It's also a shock to not recognise myself in the mirror but that's because my body and face is that of a 61 year old woman, in my head I'm definitely not that fucking old!

Am I a penguin because I'm a bit overweight and love raw fish?

Gender is sexist stereotypes, which a previous poster has proven with his nonsense about his partner having ‘female traits’. I am of the female sex and absolutely no surgery, drugs or acting out sexist stereotypes can change that.

This is the point really. I am female because my DNA says so. It also makes me physically different to a man. Why can't we all accept that? Unfortunately, all societies make a distinction between how they treat women and men. THAT's what we should be changing.

"I've always felt the need to prove that if a man can do it, so can a woman, and vice versa."

Just to clarify, that's excluding biology, which in the end is what decides who your mother and father are, not what their roles in your life will be, outside of breastfeeding (which woman are just naturally equipped for).

Trandgender ideology is the complete opposite of what I've always instinctively believed. I've always felt the need to prove that if a man can do it, so can a woman, and vice versa. That gender stereotypes were a load of shit, and harming us all to various degrees. I think masculinity is toxic, all the abusive men in my family had fragile egos. They were weak. The woman were the strong ones, who kept it all together. But would be sneered at for it by the dickheads making their lives hell, that they couldn't escape from.

The best way to get me to do something, is to have a mansplainer tell me I wouldn't be able to.

I don't carry a handbag at all, OH the humanity !

I have a silver handbag, lots of makeup and nail varnish, long hair, some high heels a lacy bits and bobs. And swords - I have several fencing swords. And Star Wars Dr Who Star Trek Lord of the Rings stuff etc etc. And I love Vikings and pirates. And space and stars. And history and gardens. And and and ... Gendertwaddle can do one.

I get told I'm "such a man" regularly as I dont wear makeup or do so called girly things. I haven't taken it personally and my chromosomes are still the same.

When I was younger I had my head shaved and was chatted up by a gay guy who then freaked out when I spoke. I really do think some men really do rely on stereotypes a bit too much.

@StrangeLookingParasite: "I've never looked like the picture in my head. It used to bother me a lot, then I realised it was actually a tiny part of life and not that important, so I ignore it. Surfaces aren't especially important."

Sorry, this is off the real topic, but this really struck a chord. I have often wondered if I would recognise myself, if in science fiction style,I walked past myself. I have also wondered if I would actually feel a jolt of recognition if I came face to face with, I suppose it would be, my doppelganger

Let’s boil it down simply for Simon:
XX chromosomes = female
Being born with a vagina = female
Sexist dated stereotypes = bullshit
There, does that help?

I had a pot noodle so I must be a teenager.

Am I a rabbit because I am having salad for dinner?

I'm a cat because I eat tuna 😁

It's not about conforming or not conforming to stereotypes based on sex, it's about the fact that none of those traits or stereotypes has anything to do with whether you are female or not. You are not more or less female depending on how well you conform to these traits.

I was called ‘son’ when I was a teenager. I’m amazed I survived.

I’ve been called ‘sir’ despite owning a gold handbag AND a cunt.

I’m amazed at my good fortune of having survived such literal violence.

"we do actually all know what 'traits typically considered to be female' are, because it's what makes us gender non-conforming" Sorry, not conforming to those stereotypic traits is what makes us GNC.

I've done too many things today, and I'm quite scattered.

Yeah, my first thought about a new poster of a demographic possibly the furthest from Mumsnet’s target demographic and only posts on FWR type threads is more sea lions than San Francisco...

To be fair to Simon, we do actually all know what 'traits typically considered to be female' are, because it's what makes us gender non-conforming. I think it's a specious argument not allowing someone whose native language isn't English to resort to the existance of stereotypes. He wasn't speaking in support of them.

Also, this "when they looked in a mirror (even when they were young), they saw a guy looking back at them that they didn’t connect to" well, welcome to my life. I've never looked like the picture in my head. It used to bother me a lot, then I realised it was actually a tiny part of life and not that important, so I ignore it. Surfaces aren't especially important.

talks about a gold lame handbag and red lipstick and how it marks them out as so CLEARLY a woman

On The Voice last night, Tom Jones wore a pink suit. On the mermaids scale, we all know what that means. I wonder who is going to tell him her.

I’d quite like to be an alien. 🌝 For some reason, you get looked at funny if you say you are human on ethnic origin, even though it is all you can be really.

One which is used by a group of people who seem to want to choose their identity by choosing a different stereotype?

If i chose a different stereotype for my identity- dreaded my hair, listened to reggae, and ate rice and peas, spoke in patois, does that make me black?

No. Choosing to conform to a socially constructed set of of norms for something does not make you that thing.

I cannot become a man any more that I can become a black person.

I agree with SimonJT’s comments if you replace the word ‘trait’ with stereotype. It’s there for a reason but that doesn’t make it true or right. It certainly can’t be used to define anyone - the fundamental problem in this whole argument. One which is used by a group of people who seem to want to choose their identity by choosing a different stereotype?