Is misgendering worse than calling someone Mrs?

Btw in case anyone hasn't read the case and thinks I'm exaggerating about the computer programmer, a man with a sexual fetish has already tried to use the equality act to force his college tutor to change his nappies while he attends on site.

WTF? Really?

Same here NotTerf. It is definitely an ageist thing, as this didn't happen to me until about 10 years ago.

And the fact people would rather call us Mrs than Miss (even though there is no visual clue that I'm Mrs) shows that in their eyes Miss is in fact worse than Mrs. - A spinster! Gasp!

Btw in case anyone hasn't read the case and thinks I'm exaggerating about the computer programmer, a man with a sexual fetish has already tried to use the equality act to force his college tutor to change his nappies while he attends on site.

This is the utter bullshit that women have to deal with constantly on one hand from men who will exploit whatever they can in the name of their sex life, and on the other hand from men patting them on the head, telling them not to be silly and paranoid, and this law they're passing will never be twisted and exploited in the way women are telling them it will. And then covering up and denying it and blaming women when it happens exactly as predicted.

You can see why the patriarchy is so very committed to socialising women to be nice: otherwise they'd never get away with it.

I've always used Ms but still get called Mrs, based on my age. It feels a bit off because I'm not married, but Miss would be as bad.

It's supposed to be so 'violent' and awful because it's disrupting that person's mental existence in their space as what they wish to be rather than what they actually are. Hence the 'erasing' and 'denying existence' lines which seem to be that they can only exist as a woman if validated and 'seen' as being what they want to be. You will find TW online talking about the need to be perceived by strangers as they wish to be perceived, and how hurtful and distressing it is essentially when they encounter reality and someone's actual perceptions instead of the perceptions they want people to at least pretend they have.

So the questions are really: is it a healthy thing to only feel 'safe' and 'existing' based on constant validation in one's chosen self image - since almost all other thinking about self image is that relying on external validation is never going to work? Is this something that is helpful to encourage people in?

Is it positive, healthy and socially appropriate to wish to control others' perceptions and minds to meet your own needs, and to have so little regard for those others' beliefs, needs and feelings? Are these equal expectations applied to all groups, or is this requesting a very special particular contract with one group of people only, which grants a very unequal burden of labour and responsibility on one side and power on the other? Is this something society should be encouraging people in?

And is it an appropriate, healthy and socially viable demand that others set aside their language, reality, their own personal needs and situation, and that they should unquestioningly and unfailingly nurture someone's illusion of being something they are in fact not? I wonder where that might go if it becomes enshrined by law? hello Mr 50 Year Old Computer Programmer with pigtails and a pink frilly frock and nappies in my kid's preschool

Absolutely accepting of men who choose to become transwomen, but transwomen are transwomen- whatever is wrong with being a transwoman? But humans can't change sex and woman is a fact and reality, not a club. That's the line of reality that has to be dealt with. And 52% of the population have needs and identities too that should not be subordinated to the very particular needs of a small group of male born people.

How the fuck are we at a place where I can go to be questioned for accurately assuming someone's sex or deadnaming but not for misnaming and announcing me as OfDh.

Sexism.

Misgendering and deadnaming deeply upset a minority of males, ones who genuinely believe they are women, or want to be seen by others as women. So obviously anything that could offend them has to be stopped.

Whereas society does not care one iota about the names or title preferences of married women. Because they're female.

The Mrs/Miss/Ms thing infuriates me.
So annoying to be defined by my marital (or not) status. The whole pronouns thing just puts you into little boxes.

I recently made the decision to go by Ms not Mrs (have taken DH's name), he was a little baffled but did understand that his marital status was not on show for all so why should mine be, but still I get called Mrs. And it's obvious that so many people think you're making some kind of stupid point by insisting on it.

It's a good point.

Misgendering is worse than EVERYTHING, haven’t you got the memo yet?

It doesn't matter if you, as the little woman, are offended. You are insignificant and should just put up and shut up
It annoys me as well OP.

Because of several of the rules of misogyny. Basically what men want is far more important than what any woman wants.