Small feminist acts

No one listened and they ran out of things to talk about.

Doesn't bother Women's hour - most topics on a tight replay loop.

Music - I don't think I know any 10 year olds who like Opera but there can be some interesting points.

Cosi Fan Tutte and the ENO production is interesting.

If you don't know the plot 2 officers are persuaded bu a friend to see if their finacees are faithful.

The friend says all women are the same and will not be faithful, so the officers tell their fiances they are off to war, they actually disguise themselves and return in disguise as albanians to attempt to seduce the other's fiance.

The disguises work and the woman are persuaded to marry the albanians but at the wedding the albanians disappear and the men return initially dressed as the officers and then dressed partly as officers and partly as albanians.

The friend persuades them all that 'women are like that' and they marry their original lovers.

ENO's version has the women overhear the conversation before the wedding and so they disguise themselves as the other so they are actually being faithful to the original fiances.

Thats very true and she's only 10 so I think I've got a tiny and ever decreasing window of opportunity to either positively influence her or at least give her a sounding board to talk through how it may bother her.

4 thanks and please feel very free to post more tips on any small acts of feminism around navigating music lyrics and music videos. I remember as a teen being mortified if my parents commented on any music I was listening to, so i find it a really tricky area.

To be fair, I've only had that conversation with a woman. (!!!)

Very true.

Good point sashh. I also point out that there was one for a bit called the locker room.

I deliberately don't, it's not the job of a woman to educate a man who could easily have found that information if they were bothered.

Refusing to buy any overly gendered baby clothes (pink & blue ) and avoiding brands which insist on selling nothing else (which rules out most of the high street, sadly).

I really enjoyed your post chattylion

Same kind of stuff as PP.

Giving younger women breaks and being as supportive as possible at work (very male dominated industry)

trying not to eye roll too hard with younger people in general if they occasionally come out with daft shite, try to talk it over them.

Adults who are old or sensible enough to know better do not usually get it sugar coated though

Securing female representation on any professional bodies at work

Trying to work out the law around sexism and gender in my mind (I am not a lawyer) so I can have it up my sleeve if needed. (Eg my workplace allows women-identifying male-bodied people into the women’s toilets..not in a position to challenge this currently but)

Trying to remember to post for lurkers on FWR

Emailing my MP about stuff, very quick and easy to do.

Emailing companies etc about women’s issues

I try to break down the madonna/whore mindset with children. Eg in reading with them (See all of Roald Dahl’s female characters) Using a mix of female characters so they don’t internalise that women and girls are either ‘good’ (always absolutely perfect and selfless and have to be ‘better/cleverer/stronger than the boys’..)
or ‘bad’ (irredeemable, an unnatural woman, doesn’t perform femininity or mothering correctly, shows emotion, has her own wants or needs etc)

So I often have to change things up when I read aloud to make them less sexist..

Self care, consciously thinking about my boundaries, working on ‘know thyself’ and remembering usually it’s a marathon not a sprint

Being happy about the small wins because they all add up

Good point sashh. I also point out that there was one for a bit called the locker room.

No one listened and they ran out of things to talk about.

Calling out people who automatically connect a woman's action or reaction to her sex.

NeurotrashWarrior

And if I talk about something on women's hour and I get the, "I want to know why there isn't a man's hour" I always reply with "No you don't, because if you did you would already know why "

IO wrote a long but well thought out email at work (i'm supply so have to think carefully sometimes) about a 'we are great at sport' type newsletter from a college.

I pointed out that the male and female basketball teams had both got to the same stage of a competition the 'men' had 'fought valiantly against the favorites but were outclassed by the better team, where as the 'girls' had not succeeded to get further in the competition.

I also pointed out that the posters offering boxing for exercise and keep fit had pictures of three men wearing belts they had won and only in the small print did it say the class was for both sexes.

I asked why Nicola Adams hadn't been featured as she had just become and always will be the first female boxer to win an Olympic gold medal that BME women roll models are scarce and that students at the college could probably identify more with her and that was better than aspiring to be Mike Tyson.

I try to challenge it when adult women are referred to as 'girls'. Depending on the circumstances I either challenge directly or pretend to be confused. Eg. At work when recently I was told to ask one of the 'girls' (all actually women over 40) to do something I said I hadn't realised we'd got work experience students in. (Male) colleague said he didn't know what I meant so I explained that since he referred to them as 'girls' they must be under 18. Other times I simply repeat back what has been said but use the word 'women' (with emphasis).

PerkingFaintly and FloralBuntingIsObnoxious expressing themselves, then owning their sh*t, then accepting each others differences and then being kind to each other. A small but impressive and valuable lesson in how two unrelated women benefit by treating each other like sisters ❤️ Love it!

Silver, I love that one.

I have a reminder in my calendar to nominate a female colleague for an industry award every three months. I've been doing it for years and a lot of them have won.

yes to naming all animals 'she'
statistically they are more likely to be female anyway.

I was asking genuinely if you knew any more about this project since you brought it up Perking! As I said I think it is a great idea but science plus bepenisedwoman just does not compute in my head. I do agree we shouldn't throw the baby out with the bathwater but I find I do question everything that refers to self iding as a woman and LGBT now because so many organisations these days at first glance appear to be about women and then turn out not to be. It's a minefield. I won't stop questioning it because I am perpetually bamboozled as to how people can redefine the word woman!

I think Vera is really good and the character is an interesting play on role reversal, plus Brenda Blethyn is ace. The latest ad on itv with her talking to the camera about whether she would be treated differently if she looked different and not needing a man to validate her had me cheering at the tv

Deadringer
life is a series of small decisions and every one counts. I always vote for women whenever possible, whether it's for government or just a committee, if there is a suitable female representative they get my vote

I rather like this^

Like having your own personal AWS.

bare
In righting things, solidarity is crucial

We can but try.

I have to young daughters, I don't call them pretty or princesses,etc, and try to get family and friends to do the same. But it's actually really hard trying to explain to family especially why I don't want them to be called pretty all the time. How do others deal with this? It's sounds like something small but it's important to me not to have then growing up with this constantly.

Ach, no worries. Sorry to hear about lack of sleep: hope you can get some rest, and things improve.

Perking, honestly, really sorry. In a bit of a bad way here, no sleep at all and I just didn't read carefully enough.

You're a poster I generally respect, Floral. As with everyone, I'm not going to agree with 100% of what you say, but I usually find your posts at least worth reading.