Trans Widows Escape Committee 2- The Trans Widows Strike Back..

Seriously a book is a good idea - a real one, an anthology of stories - and I would suggest you keep the money. It won't be a lot but divided between however many put the stories in, it would be a contribution.

Perhaps post on AIBU and Chat to find out if there are any publishers or literary agents online?

abbey44 and mine!!

I wouldn't mind sharing my story, anonymously, but my Ex would recognise us if I mentioned the blog. My counsellor said he was the worst narcissist she has heard about and she has been in counselling for over thirty years.

Foe any other Transwidows whose partners were narcisists she recommended a book to read. "The wizard of Oz and other narcissists"

Hi Tinsel
Still adjusting to his absence.
Having a wobble.
Friends don't know what to say, don't know the real reason for all my upset.
DD just told, feeling confused and upset.
I thought I could contain the 'problem', but No it's not my decision or life anymore that matters. Only the One bards selfish body/mind/high heels/makeup that matter.
I fing hate him

I watched the programs last night, and wanted to come here to say aaargh.

What also shocked me was the women transing the men, the woman dressing and coaching them, the sister transing her brother.

What is going on there. Shocking.

My one said on our wedding day....obviously after the ceremony, that I'd do until something better came along, I never knew if he meant to be funny but it's stuck with me ever since. The priest asked me prior to the wedding what would I do if a big blonde went after him.....I never realised that the big blonde was in actual fact himself, not the priest obviously lol

They are vicious - mine was never violent but he lied and cheated and said the most hurtful, nasty things he could think of to justify his behaviour - eg "on our wedding day I was in love with someone else and I chose the wrong fucking woman! Then I was stuck with you because she's with someone else now!" Meanwhile he's shagging woman number 3 or 4 because "you're a bully!"

Cadanita1 "He punched a wall beside my head when he got caught out on a lie, he told me next time it would be my face......."

I am so sorry.

re the journalism project: I would not want to participate because I am still with my spouse and financially dependent and it would be a nightmare for me if he recognized my story.

Cadanita that sounds like very typical abusive escalation I am sorry to say :(

Sorry, I get busy and caught up in much of the rest of this awesome mumsnet board :)

The funny thing is the last few years my partner seems pretty close to being peaktransed himself. Not enough to detransition or anything, I think we are way past that. He has half a foot in reality and isn't as nuts as the younger generation of new transkids. A few years ago he began to get kicked out of online trans communities for talking any sort of logic or sense. He was called a truscum and banned for saying GID is inherent to being trans.

He still is on some on facebook but he said to me the other day "they all seem so ANGRY all of the time!" I just bite my tongue.

Bird bandit if it holds any weight I believe you x

He was always selfish. He started to get really nasty after our youngest was born. When she was just over one I found out he had arranged to meet a girl in a hotel and spend a night with her but she said she didn't feel she knew him well enough for that. I found that ourt because a message popped up when I was on the computer. He said it was because the kids took up too much of my time. Then I found out about the internet dating, that was because I didn't get dressed up for him coming in. The last was an affair that was because I gave up work to look after our 4 children. He said the final straw leading to affair was because i bought his brother a bottle of Brandy for his fortieth from all of us. Still can't really understand that one. He punched a wall beside my head when he got caught out on a lie, he told me next time it would be my face.......

@Cadanita1 no you misunderstand me, that's what my ex says about me, to kill my voice.

If I'm cast as the bigot, then everything I say about how awful he is, is mute. Everything I say about this, his behaviour being a sexual fetish, that he's getting off on the control he has over me, over getting everyone to believe his pink brain bollocks. No one believes me even though it's OBVIOUS, and I have so, so much evidence, because that's nasty bigotry.

That's what he says.

Cadanita1

"Italiangreyhound I wasn't brave enough although my kids wanted me to. Greatest mistake of my life."

I feared as much and it's totally understandable that you felt afraid. I hope whatever stories you share, in whatever fashion will shine a light on this kind of awful, criminal behaviour.

He told me it was my fault, I drove him to it.

Italiangreyhound I wasn't brave enough although my kids wanted me to. Greatest mistake of my life.

Cadanita1 "He tried to push me out of a moving car and at one point push me down the stairs, our kids were there for that one."

Did you feel able to go to the police about the violence?

"He said he'd left it up to me because he was too busy." What a fucking coward.

Birdbandit I wasn't saying that we were or transphobic or homophobic. I was trying to say that we wouldn't want our cause hijacked for other people's agendas

DH is a transvestite but he knows he is a man. He knows it's a fetish. Why does he know that but others flip over into believing they are biological women?

How did the old joke go? What separates transvestites from trans women? Two years.

I believe that the more they indulge in it, the more it becomes an obsession. And we know how men are with their sexual obsessions.

This idea that I am suddenly transphobic or homophobic, accused of hating groups of people, because I'm the victim of one man's abuse is absurd.

But an absurdity designed to make my experience not count. It's a bit like attacking a rape victim because she might have once worn a skirt or said she liked sex.

My STBXH is an ad man. So knows how to sell a story.