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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Why are people so afraid?

57 replies

Yambabe · 27/12/2018 12:05

Really brought home to me this week. After the Martina thing not just peaking me but sort of chucking me off a cliff I have posted a couple of things on FB.

Ended with pretty much a 3-way convo, me, late 40s recently transitioned transwoman, father of a young transman, with occasional input from father of a young transwoman and concerned mother of pre-teen asd daughter.

It stayed respectful. Ideas went back and forth. TW friend posted same old same old mermaids/stonewall stuff, in support of self-id and medication pathway for kids. I refuted with links and stats, and asked questions which were ignored. The 2 parents of trans said some really thought-provoking and mainly gc stuff.

Thing is, throughout the whole 3 days my inbox didn't stop pinging. People saying how much they agreed with me, but couldn't say so openly because of the impact it could have on their lives or jobs. People looking at what had happened to Glinner, and particularly Robert Webb, and backing off.

How the hell did it get like this? Maybe more importantly how the hell do we let them know it's ok to have an opinion and be able to state what it is?

I am old and unimportant in the grand scheme of things but I have kids, and grandkids. Neices and nephews. How do I help make the world safe for them again? Sad

OP posts:
FlyingOink · 27/12/2018 13:04

I think social media being able to influence companies' decisions is the main problem. Ordinarily, ones employer shouldn't have anything to do with one's political opinions, except where the employer is brought into disrepute.
But now tens of thousands of people can, whilst expending very little effort (key) harass the employer to the extent they become concerned about financials.
Bob from B&Q should be absolutely free to tweet his support for Brexit, his concerns around Chinese expansionism and artificial island building, or his favourite celebrity in the jungle - if he never mentions he works at B&Q, then B&Q have got no moral right to censor him.
What's happening here is that Bob is being doxxed, outed as a B&Q employee, and B&Q end up running scared, not wanting to be associated with such a monster. In fact Bob should have expected to be able to express his opinion without reference to his employer.
Most working stooges, no matter how big their house or fancy their car, will be penniless within a few months of losing their regular income. I've seen it written that most people have two months' wiggle room and that's it.
I guess we get lured into a false sense of security in anonymously posting; it wouldn't be impossible to dox any of us on here so the moderation policy is helpful in self regulating what we can write on here.

FlyingOink · 27/12/2018 12:54

Cerebral palsy I guess?

Purplewithgreenspots · 27/12/2018 12:51

CP?

VickyEadie · 27/12/2018 12:48

newtlover

Very good points.

newtlover · 27/12/2018 12:42

well... this christmas we had a multigenerational viewing of call the midwife
me and dp (in our prime)
dcs (mid-late 20s)
my mum (80s)
after my mum left we discussed Call the MW, the dcs felt it glossed over or underplayed some serious social issues. I agreed but think they do well to raise them at all on early evening family christmas telly. So some of the issues were - treatment of kids with disabilities, the adoption of orphans from HongKong (I didn't know this was a thing) and especially the transportation of children to australia. The latter we talked about most, with the DCs incredulous that anyone should ever think this was a good idea.

But I said that at the time people really believed it was a positive thing to do, partly because we didn't appreciate then what we know now about the abuse of children and the importance of attachment and early emotional development etc etc
My conclusion was that there are things that are being done now that people believe are for the best and that in the future we will look back and wonder why we ever allowed that to happen. I didn't pursue this as we have clashed quite seriously wrt TG issues, but I feel that right now most of the people who are giving it any thought at all are thinking 'lets be kind to these poor kids' just like the people on CTM who thought they were sending children away to a happy loving home in Australia.

We are actually on the right side of history, we are the people who are raising the alarm, we are the people trying to put the brakes on. Maybe framing it that way for those who are afraid would help?
It's like people sometimes say, if you ever wondered what you would have done in 1930s Germany....look at what you are doing now, there is your answer. What would you have done when they said 'hey lets send these kids to australia, lets leave the kid with CP in a corner because no one will ever adopt him'?....that's what you are doing now.

Fairenuff · 27/12/2018 12:32

It's horrible isn't it OP. It shouldn't be down to individuals to risk their livelihoods, it should be properly discussed in government and clearly outlined in law.

I would suggest everyone writes to their MP and copies the PM and other party leaders.

CleekSle · 27/12/2018 12:25

Having no personal values, rewriting history and keeping up with woke ethics keep you safe in society whilst alive, you're only condemned once you're dead.

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