Would you still cut your long hair short if your Husband/partner said NO!

One day you will look like a middle aged Mum. What happens then?

One day you will look like a middle aged Dad, what happens then?

Perhaps you will leave that middle aged Mum and get yourself a younger model? But only if you can afford two families.

Or

You will be bald, or needing operations to knees, hips or shoulders and therefore terribly insecure.

Yes

Its your hair. Be aware what your husband is telling you about himself. You can always grow it back, but he will always be him.

I don’t think you can claim your hair to be no maintenance or fuss other than a monthly haircut. A monthly haircut is a high maintenance head. I have been to the hairdresser four times in the past decade. It’s long. But because it’s long I can slice bits off it myself and it’s fine and it doesn’t matter. Other than shampoo there is no maintenance at all.

My husband has said he prefers it long but certainly he would come around if I cut it. It's my body etc.

I actually did keep my hair long because DH asked very nicely when I told him I was considering a short cut.

As it was I was worried about the amount of styling it would need in order to look good given that I have fine straight hair, so when he sai he'd prefer not he was pushing against an open door really.

If he had been nasty about it then I would have had it short within a week and would have lived with the maintenance no matter what.

One day you will look like a middle aged Mum. What happens then?

The nastiness would concern me more than him preferring hair a certain way. I think given that sexual attraction is important in this sort of relationship I wouldn't discount my husband's opinions on my appearance, not that he expresses many. He knows that if he goes for a Movember I will be seriously unimpressed as I hate moustaches and I start to moan if his stubble gets too long as it's sore and unsexy.
Never being allowed to change your hair style sounds restrictive though.

I have always had my hair short. The few times in my life I have tried to grow it, it has been a right PITA to style, plaits fall out, ponytails drop and the whole straggly mess just drags my face down and looks rubbish. And it takes forever to wash. That's when it even gets past my shoulders. I don't do hair. Short hair is much easier for me - just wash and go.

That said, you need a hairdresser who knows what they're doing. Pixie cuts are much harder than they look. A good cut looks stylish and shows off your features, but a bad one makes you look like a 70s schoolgirl at best (think Lady Di pre-marriage) and Benny from Crossroads at worst. So unless you know your friend is a magician with the scissors, I wouldn't trust her to do it.

So if your partner goes bald through either male pattern baldness or chemotherapy does this then mean a game changer in terms of a relationship continuing?. I said this to my DP last time he mentioned preferring my hair now to when it was short. I said “I don’t suppose you’ll have your lovely bouffey hair forever, hopefully I’ll still find you attractive when you’re old and bald” which spooked him a bit

I've always felt most myself with short hair. No maintenance or fuss, other than a four weekly dry cut. I've always found having short hair very liberating. I don't think long hair suits older women, either - unless they tie it back or wear it up. Having short hair can take years off your appearance.

I guess my husband would prefer long hair - most men do - but at the end of the day it is more important to be true to yourself. I think so, anyway. I couldn't live in such a compromised way - especially over something so essential as my physical appearance and clothing preferences. I guess I must compromise on other things.

You must do what is truest or most important for you. If you like your hair long then keep it that way.

I’ve had everything from a short pixie cut to arse length.

Currently arse length because it’s been left for a year and it grows like a weed.

Short is fun but it needs loads of maintenance from someone skilled. Every 4 weeks I needed a cut. That’s expensive and a hassle and in the end I grew it out MULLET HELL is all I have to say about that.

Anyway, there’s a lot of ‘she’ in your OP about what the hairdresser wants and a lot of ‘he’ about your husband. What do YOU want?

Yes I would cut it .
I have had that exact style for a few years, (its dark now though) MW is my hair idol
It looks even better when your dark roots comes through.

So if your partner goes bald through either male pattern baldness or chemotherapy does this then mean a game changer in terms of a relationship continuing?

How shallow.

Long hair is for girls. Real women emerge from a hair cut

Says who? I'm 50 with long hair. Am an adult human female, therefore a real woman. My face doesn't suit short hair or bobs and I loathe going to hairdressers and think they are largely a massive rip off. I wash it in the shower, brush it out, occasionally pull it back in a clip, job done. The last thing I want to add to my life is the chore of hair maintenance.

Short hair is so much quicker to dry and straighten. So although it is more high maintenance than scraping a ponytail, it isn’t a huge faff to make it look styled. I’m always amazed at how quick it is to dry and style when I get it cut, even compared to a bob. I dread to think how long it takes to dry waist length hair!

OP it’s your hair - not your Husband’s and not your hairdresser/cousin’s. Of course take your H’s opinion into account but only as far as you would expect from him. We are all naturally inclined to like what we know, and not to want things to be different - sometimes it’s hard to imagine before you’ve seen it.

But once you’ve done it he will get used to it. And if either of you realises you prefer it long, it’s hair, it grows!

I dont own a hairbrush or comb

But my hairdresser comes to my house and is very cheap...so to be fair that probably makes a huge difference

Long hair is for girls. Real women emerge from a hair cut

Codswallop.

My hair has very little maintenance whether long or short.
I wash it and brush it, that's it.

Bear in mind your hairdresser will make significantly more money from a white blonde pixie cut. It will need a LOT of maintenance. So she has a horse in this race too.

This. You take issue with your h telling you what to do with your hair but you're okay with your cousin doing the same? It'll take a lot more time than a trim and colour every few months. I tried it once in my 20s and grew it out because I got sick of having to go to the hairdresser every 4 weeks and blow the better part of £50, which was a lot of money back then.

You'll need to coloured every four weeks and probably trimmed at the same time and if you don't like it, growing it out will be a ball ache

Agreed. I don't know where this idea comes from that long hair needs so much more maintenance than short hair. When my hair was long it needed nothing more than the occasional trim of the ends with kitchen shears.

I do spike mine up thought

I dont dye my hair so have little experience of that

Its cut every four weeks though it could go up to six

But its dead eay to style, takes me less than 5 minutes from start to finish and still looks good in the rain and wind

Its very, very short when i get it cut, I probably prefer it weeks 2-4

I would - my dp gets to offer an opinion, but it's my hair (clothes, face, whatever) so I have final choice.. but I have to agree with others here, that when I tried a crop I had to do my hair every day whereas at it's now unkempt long-length I can just pull it back into a pony/bun/whatever with much less effort...

I do what I like with my hair, but I had it short when we met and DH prefers it like that. I like it long so grow it long, but then get fed up with it anc cut it short. I never consult him.
But then if he came home with a skinhead I'd be horrified and would find him less attractive. I suppose I'd get used to it.