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Original poster

Badley Fuckitt Welcomes Careful Drivers

439 replies

boatyardblues · 26/11/2018 18:36

That's where I want to live right now. Home of the Bluestocking pub and the Shady Pines, the favoured retirement home of gin-swilling, cantankerous elderly gender crit feminists. It's like that village in the Dales which dodged the bubonic plague and is a haven from PoMo fuckwittery. Anyone else in?

OP posts:
JennyHolzersGhost · 27/11/2018 20:47

I could do with distribution assistance for the newsletter - perhaps you and the mare could help with that, womaninboots ?

FermatsTheorem · 27/11/2018 20:44

I think some sort of portal or teleportation device, with one end in the Bunbury Arms (just off Great Russell Street) and the other in the Bluestocking. That should enable metropolitan types to join us for the odd single malt and provide a convenient way for the denizens of Badley Fuckitt to access London.

WomaninBoots · 27/11/2018 20:34

Ah lovely. I'm sure The Mare will enjoy leaning over the wall into the beer garden, listening to the craic and begging for crisps. In between war horse duties of course. I have few useful skills outside of mare care and piloting though. Although I have always thought I might be a good librarian. Grin

ErrolTheDragon · 27/11/2018 19:44

I'm sure we can install some sort tunnel straight into the pub for metropolitan typesGrin

Floisme · 27/11/2018 19:18

Despite being suitably elderly and cantankerous, I'm afraid I'm unlikely to be joining you as I don't like the countryside or drink tea. But have a lovely time.

welshgendercrit · 27/11/2018 18:38

Interesting numbers of Librarians here, me too!

It's not surprising, ImPreCis. We're demons for accurate classification, and information. Shelve a book incorrectly and it's lost. Grin

Cuntysnark · 27/11/2018 18:04

I have kitchen skills and can find my way around a sewing machine and a sheep. I’m loading up my car as I type and just need the postcode for the satnav.

ImPreCis · 27/11/2018 17:51

Interesting numbers of Librarians here, me too!

I can also teach C25K courses, fitness and relaxation, and mindfulness.

Decent baker, and a dam good decorator, including wallpaper and everything!

Would keep a tidy garden and help with Badley Fuckitt in bloom competition.

(I get The Grauniad free at Waitrose and use it to start the wood burner, mostly without even reading it first)

ErrolTheDragon · 27/11/2018 17:48

She'd stop eventually though

If it's an island and she goes in a straight line, she'd have to.Grin

BTW, the pub already has a paddock next to the beer garden with a couple apiece female donkeys and nanny goats. I've forgotten their names.

Rufusthebewilderedreindeer · 27/11/2018 17:39

Its going to be a lovely bookshop/library

Grauniad · 27/11/2018 17:37

It's the librarian in you coming out, ISay.

ISaySteadyOn · 27/11/2018 17:35

Find!

ISaySteadyOn · 27/11/2018 17:35

Can I come do some shifts in the bookshop/library? Or run a museum for the dig?

I can also correctly sex any skeletons the archaeologists fine.

WomaninBoots · 27/11/2018 17:30

It's just galloping in a straight line, Fermats, you'll be fine.... we'll Velcro you on. The mare likes a gallop. She'd stop eventually though.Grin

FermatsTheorem · 27/11/2018 17:27

Badley Fuckitt is really shaping up well. Our own cavalry horses! (Can we have a tilt yard too? I so want to have a go at tilting at a quintain. I can't actually ride, but details, mere details...)

WomaninBoots · 27/11/2018 17:21

Can I bring the horses? One is training in cavalry style moves and is very intimidating in stature. Could probably run a decent border patrol...

FermatsTheorem · 27/11/2018 17:04

A moat and drawbridge sounds excellent. Baggsie driving the JCB to excavate the moat.

UpstartCrow · 27/11/2018 16:58

May I suggest a moat and drawbridge.

AltogetherAndrews · 27/11/2018 16:41

Well yes, but there appears to be a catagory of people who want whatever women have, just because they aren’t invited.

ErrolTheDragon · 27/11/2018 15:49

I wouldn't fear an invasion TBH - a Twitter-free mobile blackspot with a preponderance of people who are, or have been mothers is the antithesis of a cool place to be, surely?

PutYourShirtOnMartin · 27/11/2018 15:35

Can I come and live in the village too... in a house named 'Banned Tweeting'

And I want a drive with penguin bollards

welshgendercrit · 27/11/2018 15:14

Former librarian and vicar here. I'll help with running the library and sort out any hatch, match and dispatch required. Smile

AltogetherAndrews · 27/11/2018 13:44

So something like a Scottish Island, good for mountains and walking, but without the god awful weather and midges. Tricky.

Original poster
boatyardblues · 27/11/2018 13:27

hm, maybe a peninsula would be better.

The Koreans would disagree about a peninsula offering any safeguard against invasion.

OP posts:
JennyHolzersGhost · 27/11/2018 11:44

All notices and news items for the village newsletter to me by the end of the day on Thursday, please everyone ! I also have very reasonable advert slots available if anyone wishes to advertise their local business.