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Original poster

AIBU to refuse to use 'preferred pronouns'?

303 replies

BonBonns · 21/10/2018 22:14

If someone presents themselves as transgender and says they want to be known as 'she' do I have to do that?

Do I have no freedom of speech?

I do not believe people can change sex.

I do not believe that a man can become a woman. With pronoun use. With hormones. With dresses or lipstick. With surgery.

It is just NOT my personal belief.

Is it a hate crime to refer to someone born male as a man against their will?

Even if it is against mine?

Where would that end?

I am atheist. Do I have to say I believe in God to appease a Catholic? Am I forced to refer to a priest as 'Father' even though I don't follow that religion?

If someone is called David but wants to be called Dave am I to be investigated if I choose to continue using David?

Isn't this madness?

How can my own beliefs come 2nd to someone else's delusions?

It is biology. It is science. It is common sense.

A man cannot become a woman any more than I can become 23 again or an antelope.

OP posts:
pennydrew · 22/10/2018 18:54

ellastellabella You did accuse people of transphobia and bigotry here, you have had 2 comments removed for abusing us today alone. Did you not notice?

Penisbeakerismyfavethread · 22/10/2018 18:54

I haven’t RTFT because I’m shattered and I’m trying to cook.
But from a woman with two X chromosomes who has been pregnant and is currently mensturating
PLEASE- call people what they ask or use gender neutral pronouns if you can’t face calling them what they ask.

I am definitely a woman, but I’m hairstuit
I’ve got a beard, and a hairy neck and chest, if I don’t groom it every forty eight hours religiously I have a full face load of stubble.

I’ve been chucked out of women’s toilets, because people thought I’m a bloke in a dress.

If I say I’m a woman I want people to fucking hear me without me having to pull down my trousers to prove it.

ellastellabella · 22/10/2018 18:53

I never accused anyone of transphobia, and I never suggested it was as simple as just being kind, however when confronted with the opportunity to make an individual feel respected and validated, not to do so seems remarkably unkind.

pennydrew · 22/10/2018 18:52

BettyDuMonde Yes, my teen is on half term 👍 she’s painting and reading, not trolling Mumsnet and abusing women! ( they’ve had 2 abusive posts removed today so 1 more.... )

ellastellabella · 22/10/2018 18:51

It only serves information for trans youth under the GDIS, not representative of the whole population.

pennydrew · 22/10/2018 18:51

Seriously, arguing with official stats whilst using a stonewall survey 🤦🏽‍♀️

BettyDuMonde · 22/10/2018 18:50

Penny it’s half term. They’ve probably got a project to research and decided to do it on trans youth.

Hopefully they will learn a lot about research and how lobby groups aren’t reliable sources.

ladycockblocker · 22/10/2018 18:50

Actually, if you are a school kid it's actually a good thing that you're curious to find another side of the debate, but I would suggest reading up rather than accusing anyone who disagrees with you of transphobia, as it's a lot more complicated than just 'being kind':
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/womens_rights/3335962-Frequently-Asked-Questions-FAQs-I-have-noticed-here

pennydrew · 22/10/2018 18:50

You are school aged. You said it yourself. That means you’re a child. This forum is not for you.

ellastellabella · 22/10/2018 18:50

I am a) not a child and b) not trolling, just saw an opportunity for discussion and voiced my views.

pennydrew · 22/10/2018 18:50

Mumsnet is it not obvious why this forum is not for you? I don’t want to debate with a child, particularly an obviously misinformed child who has been fed lies by TRA’s.

BettyDuMonde · 22/10/2018 18:49

No they aren’t.

They are for all. One of them happened to be an inpatient. The others were not.

That’s the total number of trans youth suicide and suicide attempts.

ellastellabella · 22/10/2018 18:48

Those statistics are for INPATIENTS who are transgender.
People INSIDE a hospital. Not representative of the whole population...

pennydrew · 22/10/2018 18:47

ellastellabella

This is a forum for parents, really intended for Mums. Why is a child trolling here? It’s weird.

I want to contact your school because they’ve provided false information and it’s actually really dangerous. Stop spreading falsehoods about suicide.

Helmetbymidnight · 22/10/2018 18:47

People who don’t use the pronouns a man wants are responsible for young people feeling suicidal.

Idiot.

JellySlice · 22/10/2018 18:47

Ahh, Stonewall, that bastion of truth, honesty and inclusiveness. Hmm

BettyDuMonde · 22/10/2018 18:45

www.thetimes.co.uk/article/teen-transgender-drama-butterfly-inflates-suicide-risk-9ng3z22mv

You are being mislead. Who actually gave the assembly?

AIBU to refuse to use 'preferred pronouns'?
ellastellabella · 22/10/2018 18:45

Why call me an idiot? What about that statement was idiotic?

JellySlice · 22/10/2018 18:44

I have all the empathy in the world for women, being a woman myself

Meaningless. No different to what a TRA would say (if less aggressive).

ellastellabella · 22/10/2018 18:44

www.stonewall.org.uk/sites/default/files/trans_stats.pdf

StrangeLookingParasite · 22/10/2018 18:44

Because your ignorance is staggering, and I might be a bit more forgiving if you are really, really young (as I'm almost certain you are, especially with your last statement - only very young people say that).

ellastellabella · 22/10/2018 18:42

My age is irrelevant- why should that have any bearing on whether what I am saying is valid or if this forum is 'for me'.

Helmetbymidnight · 22/10/2018 18:42

Some of the people on this thread make these kids feel like they would rather die than be who they are

Idiot.

ladycockblocker · 22/10/2018 18:41

Interesting you should say that- I have been in no way misogynistic and I have all the empathy in the world for women
Gaslighting. Why not just call me fat and ugly too and I'll have a full card on misogynist bingo.

BettyDuMonde · 22/10/2018 18:41

That wasn’t a proper peer reviewed research study.

This is the real research: gids.nhs.uk/evidence-base