Lurkers of FWR, pop in and say Hi!

Lurker here trying to involve myself more by posting where I feel I can add something. I read every day. Honestly reading This board has opened my eyes on what kind of feminist I am and how much it means to me. It also "peak transed" me very quickly! Also have joined twitter and trying to follow other gc posters mainly just to like their comments for support but also to try and find gc connections local to me.

I'm a long term lurker. Like others I don't say much because others have usually put it so well already.

I'm so glad there are women here who are willing and able to fight the cause and stick their necks out. I am following everything and have so much admiration for you all.

I do have a vested interest because a close family member is married to someone who fairly recently came out as trans in their late 50s and is throwing themselves into activism. The wife (my relative) is putting on a brave face but she is in a horrible position. She has been a feminist her whole life and was a role model to me. She is being supportive of the person she married but i think that underneath she is very conflicted.

I'm a frequent lurker that has a lot to learn and don't feel I have much to add to the knowledgeable posters. I am in awe of the bravery and knowledge of those posting and those sticking their heads above the parapet.

I'm quiet but I'm angry!

I'm mainly a lurker. For a long time I couldn't understand why titles of FWR threads in active were all about trans things. I thought that feminists were going into bat on behalf of the trans community for some reason unknown to me, as I know that in general feminists will fight for other oppressed groups.

I had a look and was drawn in to the issues. Like many women, I thought I was a feminist...and I was, I was a feminist without knowledge. I had no idea that TW were claiming to be W, and it look me a while to understand why that is a bad thing. I certainly had no idea that there were trans people without, ' gender dysphoria'. I was profoundly shocked to learn about AGP...but it explained so much.

My IL's have a friend whose husband transitioned late, he is an absolute hellish individual. These threads led me to the trans widows threads which I have passed on to my ILs to pass on to their friend.

Now I am angry. I'm furious about the way that men are squeezing women out and institutions are letting it happen. I can't let it happen without challenging it.

With @uncomfortablydumb and other friends from MN, we are exploring our understanding and our anger. We are adding our voices.

Thank you all.

I lurk. I google based on things I've read here. I discuss things further with OH, friends, colleagues. The threads in feminism really ignite my thinking. I'm not active however so am just a lurker!

De lurking. Grateful for you all

@FWRLurker it'd be really interesting to hear a story of somebody who genuinely changed their mind. Those stories never get told.

Another lurker here reporting in; I've been lurking on MN for many years and for the past 18 months spending a lot of time in FWR. There are so many articulate and fabulous women on here - you're an inspiration.

I haven't spoken about the trans rights debate much in real life apart from to DH and 3 teen DC - all of whom are gender critical and think it's nonsense. DS1 attends a youth group which recently sent a diversity monitoring form asking about his gender assigned at birth - I threw it on the fire in annoyance but now wish I'd filled it in and returned it explaining the errors of their ways

I work for a children's organisation and am poised to ask questions about safeguarding in relation to trans issues should the need arise.

Good idea thanks

If I was to email my local gurdwara and mosque to make sure they are aware to the GRA consultation

Maybe ask them if they've provided any consultation guidance that you might be able to consult for examples as you're currently filling it in and want to make sure that you've provided as well-rounded a set of responses as you can?

@TinselAngel

Yes. One day he said "I realize I am actually a guy" and promptly stopped everything. Dressing, hormones, online trans forums etc.

He doesn't like to talk about it. It's like it never happened.

I probably do have some unresolved resentment about it. Maybe discussing it with you lovely women would help.

If I was to email my local gurdwara and mosque to make sure they are aware to the GRA consultation how would I go about it without sounding patronising, have other people done this?

Lurker here - I have learned so much from reading these FWR boards. Thanks to all who have helped me clarify and strengthen my opinions, as well as question so much of what is going on at the moment.

Longtime lurker here. Hi there!

Also lurking and learning lots, planning to fill in the GRA consultation on the back of all I’ve read.

😘

Hi!
returns to lurkers corner

Hello. Lurking and learning over here too!

Never ever feel you have nothing worth adding, the best things are AKWAYS worth repeating!

arranfan thank you

Both for the t-shirt link, and the lovely story about the fab man waiting on a chair to inspire the young.

Hi @FWRLurker it would be fascinating to hear from you on the Transwidows thread.

Did your husband desist from identifying as trans?

DanceLikeEmmaGoldman wrote: Seriously lurkers? Listen to yourselves. “Not clever enough”. “Not erudite enough”. And then crack a brilliant joke or say something insightful.

^^ This. Years ago I read a piece by the founder of a youth organisation in the US who explained why he waited on a chair, at the top of the stairs, every night so that he could welcome all those timorous young people who were garnering up all of their courage to walk up those stairs.

He wrote with such knowledge, wisdom, and compassion of the struggles, both internal and external, that those young people had to contend with before they could persuade themselves to walk up those stairs. And he wanted to be there, so that there would be someone to welcome them, and let them know they'd made a positive change in their lives and they had a positive contribution to make to the lives of others.

Hi! I have been lurking for a little while but have just started posting this week. I have name changed though as my last one was possibly outing - I hate it that I am even worried about that though.

I have been galvanized a bit into action now and have been talking to family and friends, asking them to do the consultation, and have just done a few tentative likes on Twitter I am thankful to everyone who is being much braver, I really do feel this is a crucial moment in the fight for women's rights

Thanks for this thread! I've been lurking for about a year, but have become really quite immersed for the last couple of months.

Sadly I tried to open a GC conversation with my DSis, to be told "Oh, it doesn't really affect me...." Best friend however is TPing with the rest of us.

Was cheered to find a lovely note through my door thanking me for displaying the "Women = adult human female" leaflet in my window.

Seriously lurkers? Listen to yourselves. “Not clever enough”. “Not erudite enough”. And then crack a brilliant joke or say something insightful.

Just jump in. Have a crack. Apart from the fact you all have a contribution to make, it’s important that the multitude of women’s voices are heard.