Regular, name changed because this is both outing and a bit embarrassing.
I'm having a really amazing time at work. I'm being affirmed and encouraged by my managers to apply for promotion, which feels amazing. It's the first time in my life I feel like I've been seen as something other than a sex object.
But I am letting the side down hugely in a really trivial but big to me way. I keep getting crushes on male bosses. It happened in my last job too, and I've noticed it occuring in other settings in my life with men who have a certain amount of authority over me.
I feel totally ridiculous because it's such a schoolgirl, nonsense thing to be worried about, and I'm trying to understand the dynamics too. I have no intention of acting on any of this, because I want to do well in my career, but I would really rather not have to deal with this kind of crap and I'm hoping that maybe asking the wise women of FWR about what might be going on in my head from a feminist perspective, I might be able to adopt some strategies for rising above...