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Trans sexuality

81 replies

iamawoman · 10/08/2018 09:21

Just wondering about peoples perspectives on this
As a heterosexual female, I am not attracted to women (my loss, i know). Therefore I would be very unlikely to be attracted to a feminine appearing transwoman with a femininised body. However equally I wouldn't be attracted to a trans woman with a penis, as sexual attraction is not just about genitals, however they are an essential part of a sexual relationship, so this also rules out attraction to a trans male as they do not have functioning genitalia . I am sure I can't be alone on this and just wondering where this does leave trans people in terms of relationships and defining their sexual preferences. Is this transphobic??

OP posts:
ToeToToe · 10/08/2018 09:47

Absolutely right - Upstart - I meant that's what the TRAs call it. And it is an insult.

Gileswithachainsaw · 10/08/2018 09:43

I mean obbiousky people do cope I guess but I know I would feel selfish and rapey even for pursuing a sexual relationship with someone who potentially couldn't enjoy it or feel it the same way I do.

UpstartCrow · 10/08/2018 09:41

No, its not called 'cishet'. It's called 'heterosexuality'.
Sexual orientation is not bigoted. Its innate not learned, its not something you have to deal with or get over.

Who trans people want to hook up with is their business. Same as for everyone. Feminist theory tends to say thats not an issue as long as its always informed and consenting.

Gileswithachainsaw · 10/08/2018 09:40

I'm also not sure how it works.

People can talk about this obsession with genitals bit sex and possibly children are a natural progression. If sexual function can be affected by childbirth which is something the body is designed for then I just can't see how after such brutal surgery the sexual function and feeling can survive the surgery.

How do people cope in relationships when such important sides of it aren't achievable in the same way.

I'm attracted to men.ive been attracted to those who are slightly effeminate in sone way and those who are the complete opposite but who they were was who they were not a role they were playing.

It's not transphobiv to be attracted to men with real penis or women with real vaginas. Of you are planning to be in things for the long haul you won't spend that time with people who aren't in the same place or who can't give you what you want or need.

ToeToToe · 10/08/2018 09:34

I'm the same as you. I think it's called "cishet" ?

Some call it transphobic - the "TWAW, TMAM" chanting types. Some call it being "obsessed with genitals". Some call lesbians who don't do penises "vagina fetishists". It's all pretty grim imo.

I've def seen it written on MN that if you see a guy in a bar, think they're male and fancy them, but don't consider them as a partner when you find out they have a vagina - then that would be bigoted. Which I don't agree with at all.

Ooforfoxsakeridesagain · 10/08/2018 09:31

Trans people will either fancy men or women or both, the same as everyone else.

It isn’t transphobic to be attracted to one sex over the other.

There are two sexes.

Then there’s all the other stuff.