I wonder what it feels like to try to convince yourself of this stuff.
Maybe it's that "if I can have periods then I'll be a real girl!" thing.
But you must also know it's not true - that periods are necessarily about menstruation, and you can't imagine yourself into one (as I remember well from the endless two week wait). So it can't ever really work deep down.
At what point after jumping into all this stuff do you begin to wish you hadn't? And once it's your entire public persona and community, how do you back down?