Lachlan Stuart on Alex Drummand (Stonewall Advisor on trans)

Three seconds in, Alex sitting in a therapy circle, launching himself into a tedious narcissistic essay on 'the first day I went out in a skirt' - bloody hell. What a massive bore.

Absolutely about the sexual vibe.

According to Blanchard, if AD is not a homosexual transsexual, he's an autogynephile.

I love that the screencap in the video of Alex is the classic man sounding off on something with the assumption that there's an audience waiting to hear his words of wisdom pose. Looks like it was taken in the brief pause to draw breath between one wanky, condescending statement and the next.

Yup, agreed. I remember a deeply creepy interview where AD said to camera "I think I've made a lot of straight women discover their inner lesbian..." and I just about spat tea over the TV, while thinking (cue Star-Wars-y portentious voice) "The self delusion is strong in this one!"

I get the idea that AD is getting off sexually on doing this, yes. Which makes AD even creepier.

I'm sure that AD does come across better in real life (given that everything I've seen AD in has made AD come across as an ocean-going chud, this is a low bar), but AD is still barging around telling women what being a woman is. And I get a sexual vibe off of AD while AD is so doing. Does this come across IRL?

Maybe its just me but how egotistical is man who says he wants to widen the bandwith of what being a woman is. Hello - you know nothing about the lived experience of a woman - trying widening the bandwith of masculinity which tou do know something about

Just remember... women can fix cars too!

Alex doesn't think like a woman, feel like a woman or live like a woman

Exactly - we'll said- and Alex is not the only one these apply to - these simple facts seem to cause ructions in some - strange how some words have that effect upon them and yet they are so blind to the harm their words cause to many women.

I think the bandwidth of being a plonker is quite wide enough already.

Quite right Terry

Yes to this, and for the 20 millionth time, I cannot believe that this needs explaining!

This is why we need and Lotta
It would be murder to go on explaining the obvious to the unreasonable without them

They’re certainly widening the bandwidth of being a plonker.

'AD has no idea what it feels like to be female because female is not a feeling in a man's head and personalities are not male and female'

Yes to this, and for the 20 millionth time, I cannot believe that this needs explaining!

Alex should have said they want to widen the bandwidth of men. Fine by me

I'd be wary of a psychotherapist who lies

Whatever Alex thinks or doesn't think, the only thing they 'do differently' is wear a skirt.

Alex doesn't think like a woman, feel like a woman or live like a woman.

Alex might very well be a thoroughly nice person. I don't doubt it. They don't come across as malicious.

But the words Alex is using to describe their situation are all wrong.

I can't help wondering what is Alex's motivation? Being gynephellic but wearing a skirt would indicate cross dresser.

Alex might just like skirts, but that is a singularly, incredibly one-dimensional reason, to put yourself out there as anything under the trans umbrella.

Alex needs to stop referring to themself as anything 'woman-esque', because they are merely underpinning regressive stereotypes and demonstrating zero affinity with women.

Lots of references to "she feels female".what does that mean, what does it feel like to feel female, in a way that doesn't involve anything biological?
We need men who want to wear stereotypically feminine clothing etc to own their maleness and not claim to be female or to be trans - now that would really expand the bandwidth.

Gasp - me too, but Alex thinks that young children identified his GQ identity when he was the same age and not necessarily aware of it himself.

In therapy (as all Psychotherapists undergo as part of their training), we can only explore our understanding/opinions of our past and it is exceptionally easy to 'rewrite' it. 'Remember' an event/events repeatedly in therapy and it becomes our 'truth'.

Memory is notoriously unreliable. Eyewitness accounts of crimes and the fragmented memories of trauma are unreliable let alone externally 'implanted' memories that can be harmless (the millions of people who 'remember' Walkers crisps changing colour when it never happened) to more damaging and dangerous 'memories' leading to false confessions and convictions.

I've done it myself.

I find it particularly odd that a psychotherapist can't see this.

I very much agree Gasp0de, it's a bit concerning..

Oh I agree with the 'bandwith' comment. That pissed me off immensely.

Personally, I think Alex IS doing more to widen the bandwidth of 'male' and wish she said that. Because that's what she does. She believes (and says) that anger and hatred often results from people feeling they're being conned in some way or treated as if they're stupid or it is demanded that they pretend something is true when it is a lie. So she says there is no such internal battle when people meet her.

Yes, she feels female and prefers female pronouns but wears what she recognises as stereotypically female clothes (but not sexually overt ones) and make up on an obviously male body. She isn't trying to 'pass' or pretend to be a biological female and insist people believe she is or treat her as a woman. She's trans, she is GQ. She isn't trying to fool anyone. She is who she is and knows that no-one will confuse her with, or feel pressured to treat her as a woman. Because although she 'feels' like one, she knows she is biologically male and pretending she isn't would provoke negative reactions from men and women.

She hasn't posted on her Twitter for about a year which does make me wonder if it's because she wants to not be called to support TRA she doesn't agree with (or I might be making that up!) but in the 1000s of tweets before that there are no tweets suggesting any TRA activity that I could object to. Other than a couple of mentions of being friends with Paris Lees. That disappoints me but I also know I have friends but don't agree with everything they say.

More and more I think from a very, very young age children start getting a sense of what's acceptable behaviour for boys and girls, men and women. They know which they are because of their anatomy. I can easily see how in the mind of a preschooler 'I-don't-feel-like-everybody-seems-to-think-a-boy-should-feel' could turn into 'I-don't-feel-like-everybody-seems-to-think-a-boy-should-feel-so-I-must-be-the-other-thing-which-is-a-girl'.

I find it particularly odd that a psychotherapist can't see this.

Here's the thing, AD wants to have their male entitlement cake and eat it too.

AD has no idea what it feels like to be female because female is not a feeling in a man's head and personalities are not male and female.

If AD was just going about their business widening the bandwidth of being male then I'd maybe agree with what you say (and I appreciate you have some insider perspective having met AD) but that's not what appears to be going on here...

Oh yeah the video is bollocks and offensive and not at all how she comes across in RL nor what she seems to actually say in RL. Her lectures are more representative to be honest.

I also don't believe for a second she didn't know what TG is until her 40s but didn't think I could say that after a few hours at a professional conference!

Many will disagree with me but I don't object much to TW like her. She seems to be saying 'I feel like a woman but don't claim to be one'. If all TRAs were like that, there wouldn't be much of a problem.

Well if that's the case then Alex needs to get that YouTube video taken down. It's full of such damaging stereotypes, Alex claims to be a 'lesbian' and says that want to 'widen the bandwidth of woman'. I think all those things are damaging to women.

If that is not the message that Alex is giving, then they need to rethink how they are coming across. I think Alex comes across as an alright person, but the message they are sending is all wrong (IMO)

I've met Alex. She says she prefers female pronouns but didn't object when people slipped up.

She also clearly identifies herself as a transwoman (not as a woman) and genderqueer (between female and male) and even though I don't think that is a 'thing', I don't really object to someone like her saying it. She also is 100% behind 'genderless' third spaces as she feels that makes life easier and safer for everyone.

When I met her I was ready to think she was a narcissistic arsehole and although I don't agree with everything she believes, I felt she wasn't a TRA that is threatening womens rights - she's clear that she's trans in a 'genderqueer' way and not a woman.

As a very good Psychotherapist I can't imagine her insisting that traumatised women be forced to share female spaces with male bodied people (which she recognises she is). She recognises her male biology but wants her GI to be related to her 'personality', which she feels is more female. Willing to be corrected if I'm wrong however as I only spent a couple of hours with her.

That video of her makes her look like a twat and I think she might regret it.

I also surreptitiously watched her go to the loo in the mens but maybe that was due to the event we were at and she doesn't normally?

To be honest, I'm not nervous or angered by TW like her. She says she feels like a woman but recognises she isn't one, she's trans or GQ. She doesn't want to be discriminated against by being a TW or GQ which is fair enough.

Many will disagree with me but I don't object much to TW like her. She seems to be saying 'I feel like a woman but don't claim to be one'. If all TRAs were like that, there wouldn't be much of a problem.

Like a previous poster said; If you feel like a woman and want to be called she (as a preference rather than a demand) and challenge gender stereotypes and wear eyeshadow with your beard, knock yourself out.