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Original poster

please don't vanish - we are all crucial to the future for women and girls

111 replies

loveyouradvice · 25/06/2018 23:24

This is just a plea for that really....

I do understand how upset so many people are about Mumsnet's recent policies and the confusion and hurt they have caused - yes I have sobbed tears late into the night too

But please stay! I am sad so many are fleeing - and hope that some will maintain their sanity by not being on here every day, but coming on when feeling strong enough.

More than anything I think it is important that many of us are here now, with the government consultation launching on 7 July - speaking out on this board and AIBU and chat - so that people understand the conflict between women/girls right and trans rights as currently proposed - so that people understand what we may be about to lose before we do - and recognise that this isn't transphobia, but actually talking about the challenges and doing that much-quoted but seldom done "equality impact assessment" for everyone affected

It is fine and fair to ask about what will happen to women and girls - and to want transpeople to have strong rights

OP posts:
littlbrowndog · 25/06/2018 23:47

Not going. Eyes been opened. Important to stay

hairylegsonshow · 25/06/2018 23:46

Yes, thank you to those who have given their time, energy and wit to post on the feminism boards - but I can see why now it is extremely difficult for many women to keep posting on the site. I have been a lurker, and have had my eyes well and truly opened over the past 18 months, and am now most definitely a radical feminist raising two gender critical children Grin. The effect of the TRA agenda on this site will only cause more women to rise up in real life and influence friends, their MPs, local media etc. They go low we go high.

UpstartCrow · 25/06/2018 23:44

For the people who are leaving, its not a choice.

Branleuse · 25/06/2018 23:41

I'm not planning on going.

BettyFloop · 25/06/2018 23:40

I agree that health and wellbeing must come first.
My mental health is pretty robust so I'll risk strikes and stay. And I'll centre the safety, privacy and dignity of women and girls in things I say here while not engaging with the narcissists and goady fuckers whose sole intent is to shut us up. I will also attempt to jump through the imposed hoops in an effort to ensure any points I make are acceptable but also understandable.

BettyFloop stepping up.

XRaySpex · 25/06/2018 23:40

Hi, I would say health comes first, yes.
But I get the impression that some posters don't actually want to go but have no choice if they get 3 deletions (4?). So it's not always choice really.

pombear · 25/06/2018 23:36

love whilst I appreciate your message, I don't think we can ask anyone to 'stay' in the environment.

And it pisses me off that I refer to this 'environment' right now.

On a board called 'women's rights'feminism chat' within a wider business model and boards based on championing the issues, the questions, the community that females have sought out and have helped to build here over the years.

Because I absolutely know some of the people who are pushing hard, displaying bullying behaviour, revelling in the mangling of language, the tying up in knots that women are doing in this space to stay, under the eye of MNHQ's vague guidelines, will be getting off on this.

They will be getting off on the absence of some, the departures, the stress of others.

And that's not supposition - as so many people have highlighted here, not by 'hysteria' or anecdote, but pointing to evidence, we know there are many people within the 'umbrella' definition, who will do so. And many of us have experienced those types of people in real life.

The toll it takes to keep debating, rationally, calmly - and I don't know any of the real lives of those who have kept this subject alive when lots of us were unaware.

Who have experienced similar abusive, gaslighting, relentless behaviour in their real lives too.

All I can say is thank you to those who contributed in the past to grow our awareness.

Thank you, especially if it came at emotional or personal cost to you.

I suspect you have opened many of our eyes here to the issues so, even if it's enough for you here and you leave, there are lots of others to keep spreading the word.

spontaneousgiventime · 25/06/2018 23:36

I know a woman, you all know her. She is strong and she doesn't ever give in, she is tireless and dogged. She is now exhausted. She is at the end of her rope. She doesn't know where to turn. If women like her are beat by the oppressive guidelines (there I said what many think) here. How does anyone else stand a chance to post here?

MN wants us gone, that much is clear.

Original poster
loveyouradvice · 25/06/2018 23:32

spontaneous wise words as always.... I so understand that those with health issues have to prioritise those: more important than anything.

I also understand the fear and offense.

But yes, I hope those who can will stay - I think Mumsnet will see what is happening and step in if this continues too long - and will NOT let this be decimated like other feminist boards.

I think that if we keep asking and keep strong they will eventually respond.......

OP posts:
spontaneousgiventime · 25/06/2018 23:31

Sorry, that should be mental HEALTH issues. Deeply sorry for that.

spontaneousgiventime · 25/06/2018 23:29

People can't post here. Some have autism or mental issues that the new guidelines have made their lives here impossible. It's fine to ask people to stay but health and wellbeing must come first.

Some people are frightened to post here for fear of saying the wrong thing and getting a strike. Some have been deeply offended by certain posters here.

Do we just tell them all to stay?