I got a man kicked out of the pub last night

Well done OP and I’m so glad the staff were great! A few years ago when on holiday a man grabbed my arse and I told him where to go, he tried to make a joke of it and eventually came back over to me (after obviously being told off by his much more decent friend!) to apologise and I didn’t accept - he told me I was rude (the same sleaze was all over almost every woman in the bar) On a different night I might not have said anything but I’m so glad I did and it’s strengthened my resolve if it ever happens again.

See you have already emailed them, sorry missed that.

Definitely let wetherspoons know how good they were.

I'm sorry that man assaulted you - and the "smirk" is one I know well. Once walking through a crowded pub and as i walked along some bloke put his hand in between my legs from behind and ran his hand from font to back, it was vile. I turned round and there were two young lads doing the smirk - in that case it was "haha you don't know which of us it was so you can't do anything". I was really shocked and just walked away, told my friends when I sat down they were all having a good time and told me not to make a fuss...

I am SO pleased that you got this fucker kicked out. Good for you.

Well done OP though. I shouted at a groper on a train when I was about 20 - and do you know what - no-one stared at me but they all stared at him, so much that he slunk off at the next stop.

Gryffen you're so right - I mean the women's prisons are just full of women convicted for sexual assault aren't they, while there are very few in male prisons. Oh, wait...

Bloody well done you! I shouted 'don't touch me' at a man who stood behind me at a gig and placed his hands on my shoulders.

That made up slightly for all the groping, touching, catcalling I haven't called out over the years.

You're fab

I had a boyfriend who managed many bars. He always told me to speak to the bar staff about any hassle from men and they would throw them out. Bars do not want an antisocial arsehole driving their customers away. He was right. Since then, any hassle I have got, even just a persistent talker who tries to join your table, I have reported to bar staff and they have been removed.

OP You are brilliant - utterly horrible for you but WOW~! You go girl... as my DD would say. Incredibly well-handled and really delighted the bar staff supported you.

Well worth writing a letter - both to local branch and to CEO or Head office. They'll really notice and it will start (if they don't already) them recognising how powerful this sort of PR is.and how it helps their image as a "safe place for women and families"... i.e. I would tell them how you're telling all your friends about it and have already posted on Mumsnet!

I’m really impressed with Wetherspoons for chucking him out immediately. It’s normally a case of “behave yourself mate” and then “I mean it pal, once more and you’re out” before they finally get chucked. Which is really just like saying “you can assault 3 women before you get put out”

Well done OP I am impressed with your quick reaction!

It's great spoons were supportive.

Sorry that happened to you, OP.

Fucking well done OP!! And thank you for doing that. Things have happened to me before and I’ve never been brave enough to say anything. Except one time when I was told I was over reacting.

Please do write to Wetherspoons and thank them.

And so sorry your assault reporting has been derailed by a “women are worse” poster. I’m not sure who thinks it’s appropriate to see that someone has been assaulted and come and tell them about the people who have done worse to others. It’s an odd mindset.

Now, been doing this many years and in total fairness woman behave worse than men and that's due to the double standard (I'll explain below!)

Oh, you’re one of those women, who say women are worse like it’s a fact when every single statistic shows otherwise. I bet you think feminism has Gone Too Far as well?

Really, gryffen?

Surely men are (usually) bigger and more intimidating? I mean OK women can be lairy but generally they are less intimidating with it? Women can be sex pests and rapists too but look at the statistics.

Oh shut up Gryffen.

I'm sorry this happened to you but I am heartened to hear it was taken so seriously and dealt with.

Sorry to hear what happened to you OP. Well done to the Weatherspoons staff for taking the incident seriously and dealing with it. Writing to their head office to thank them will hopefully help endorse the behaviour the bar staff took, if it isn't already a workplace policy.

gryffen This thread is about the OP's experience and not an invitation to discuss who is worse at dishing out sexual harassment.

I think it is different when women do it though, as there isn’t an undertone or threat to it. I was catcalled when I was much younger and better looking, which was embarrassing more than threatening. Same again if I was out dancing at a nightclub strange women would insist on sticking their butts in my crotch, which I’d rather they didn’t. I don’t know how many times my own butt has been pinched. HOWEVER if it was a man who was likely 15-20% bigger than me doing all that I would feel differently.

I also saw a random drunk much older woman go up to a teenage girl and grab her butt so is it as bad as when women do it to women? Again there isn’t the background of violence but I did feel sorry for the girl.

I think we have to build societal norms against the backdrop of violence and relative size differences. I hope you are ok OP and hope you feel you can go out again. This shouldn’t happen.

The women are always the worst - really?!

I have never, drunk or sober, accidentally or purposely, sexually assaulted another person. On numerous occasions I have been groped, had my physical space invaded, been pestered and had to go into toilets or leave places due to harassment by males. I don't think my experience is unique.

(Doublestandard - woman go to chippendales and it's fun - men go to strip club and it's perverted!)

Personally going to see The Chippendales will never be on my list of "fun" and the objection to men going to strips has nothing to do with it being "perverted".

I don't remotely condone The Chippendales - it sounds pretty grim- but even I who haven't read even baby books of beginners' feminism can understand the difference in the power dynamics between the Chippendales and their audience and a strip club audience.

OP - yes you should thank the bar staff.

How many men have to guard their drink in a bar or nightclub? Fuck off with women are the worst.

The women are always the worst?
I have literally lost count of the amount of times I have been sexually assaulted in bars or clubs when in my 20s. ALWAYS by men. I have never, ever been assaulted by a woman.
Hands down my top, having my arse grabbed, hands between my legs, forced kissing etc etc.