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Original poster

Wondering what people think about this..

33 replies

BertrandRussell · 10/06/2018 09:49

Ds is 17 and straight. He went to our local Pride yesterday and had a great time-including being chatted up quite a lot (he is very good looking in a Brideahead-y sort of way). He came home very cheerful and had had a massive confidence boost. Now I know that if he had been a young woman and had gone to an event where men had repeatedly propositioned her I would be thinking it was completely inappropriate. Am I being hypocritical in feeling differently because he is a boy? What's going on here?

OP posts:
mountainfalls · 10/06/2018 10:00

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HarryLovesDraco · 10/06/2018 09:59

The equivalent scenario is your straight daughter being chatted up by women; would that bother you?

Your (straight or gay) daughter being chatted up by men she's not interested in is a completely different scenario and not what happened with your son.

MsBeaujangles · 10/06/2018 09:59

I agree.

Some young people enjoy the attention and interest and others don’t. I think it comes down to how the ‘interest’ is expressed and then what happens when interest shown is not responded to.

I

mountainfalls · 10/06/2018 09:58

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Gileswithachainsaw · 10/06/2018 09:57

Power imbalance

Gileswithachainsaw · 10/06/2018 09:57

I think it kinda depends on the circumstances.

Sometimes with women it's not so much the "chatting up" it's the way it's done. The blocking of escape route. The kinda picking off from her group and pouncing. The refusal to accept someone's not interested or doesn't want a drink.

If two people are happy to talk and both feel safe and not threatened then that's ok.

I think with two guys there's less of a lower imbalance . Well some of the time anyway. But of course any sinister behaviour as previously outlined is not right whatever combination

AsAProfessionalFekko · 10/06/2018 09:54

It depends how the attention was - a woman may feel more intimated by (larger bodied) men making sexual comments and may well have been touched or had her boobs/bum pinched.

Your son was probably flirted with by men who most likely knew he isn't gay.

Bridechilla · 10/06/2018 09:54

Surely you would only feel it was inappropriate for a female to receive similar attention if it was unwanted attention? The gender/sexual orientation is irrelevant.