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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Terri Strange

60 replies

Delphiniumum · 01/06/2018 01:35

I'm really struggling with her ideas. In theory, I can see where she's coming from, but I'm unsure how they would practically work.

For example, she states it's unfair that women with children take up priority in refugees or homeless spaces over childless women. I'm unsure what we could do to rectify this? One home available and two homeless women - the only difference between them being one has a child and one doesn't, who should take the house? Surely, when we have limited resources, those resources have to be given to the most vulnerable. Would she suggest that the childless woman take the homeless space while the mother and her child stayed in the streets instead? Until we have equal resources for everyone, not prioritising is impossible. Confused

She also thinks that women should stop breeding and instead focus on creating a better more equal society. Again, good in theory, but wouldn't the human race die out if everybody did that? Does she mean that we should reduce the birth rate until this better society has been realised?

She recognised that lesbians and heterosexuals and bisexuals exist, and feel sexual atttaction, but rejects the language of "sexual orientation". She positions herself as "against heterosexuality" and feels women should resist it.

I'm not a radfem, and apparently these are basic rad fem ideas, she says.
Any thoughts and/or help understanding? Pointers in the right direction.

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Delphiniumum · 04/06/2018 13:08

@LassWiADelicateAir

I came across her on Twitter, she had I think 2kish followers, and had made a comment saying she was "against heterosexuality" and a few other things, I asked what she meant, but being Twitter it can be hard to get a proper explanation so I found her YT. I was jw if anyone had experience.

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LassWiADelicateAir · 03/06/2018 03:29

Thanks Bewilderness I don't get it either.

thebewilderness · 03/06/2018 03:23

No, Lass, she just a woman who has something to say and like so many others chooses to say it on youtube.
I do not understand the urge but lots of people do it so wev.

LassWiADelicateAir · 03/06/2018 02:39

I found Terri Strange so boring and irritating that I gave up on the linked video after about 3 minutes.

Is she famous/ important/ clever/ anyone I should give a toss about?

Delphiniumum · 02/06/2018 22:51

Then I saw her verbally abuse and mock women day after day who questioned her assertions about them.

She did seem to make assumptions about other women who were leaving critical comments on her videos, saying they weren't real feminists, dismissing them as white and middle-class, while simultaneously defending herself by saying "you don't fucking know me, it's clear from your comments, you don't know who the fuck I am" Hmm

I'll stay clear

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thebewilderness · 02/06/2018 21:35

It's just I've also heard Terri say that she is a "real" radical feminist and that lesbian separatism is the logical outcome.

I heard her say that too.
Then I saw her verbally abuse and mock women day after day who questioned her assertions about them.
That was when I realized she really really hates women. Until I met her and a few other self proclaimed feminists on FB I had no idea how many of them project their hatred of their mothers on to all mothers. It was a bit of a shock.

Uyulala · 02/06/2018 18:15

She frames women in heterosexual relationships as "sleeping with/colluding with the enemy" in that video series on mothers or a similar video; does it follow that POC who are in relationships with white people are also doing that, in her world...

LaSqrrl · 02/06/2018 13:34

and that lesbian separatism is the logical outcome
Broken clocks can still be right twice a day.

Delphiniumum · 02/06/2018 12:50

@LaSqrrl

Thank you for clarification. It's just I've also heard Terri say that she is a "real" radical feminist and that lesbian separatism is the logical outcome.

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thebewilderness · 02/06/2018 02:17

I think it is extremely misogynistic and arrogant to go on and on with this line of why don't you think about it/ you would benefit from a bit more introspection /why don't you consider the possibility of being more flexible?

Except they did not do that.
You copied quotes from another thread and posted them here over and over again and then claimed it was them going on at length about it.
Others have barely addressed it except to say that they do see a difference in the way males and females talk about our sexuality.

I am starting to get what you mean. I just do not understand why you are flogging SD the way you are.

thebewilderness · 02/06/2018 02:11

Do you mean the person in the video or just the quotes you brought over from another thread?
It is very difficult to understand what you are accusing people of when it consists of "some one said some things somewhere".

AngryAttackKittens · 02/06/2018 02:07

Which isn't to say that I agree with Terri or with SomeDyke (I don't), but the difference in motivations is fairly obvious, and conflating the two is letting men off the hook for being pushy creeps.

AngryAttackKittens · 02/06/2018 02:05

Unless SomeDyke's goal is to persuade unwilling women to have sex with her, which it clearly is not, then no, she does not sound like Riley Dennis, and the attempt to conflate the two is goady.

LassWiADelicateAir · 02/06/2018 02:02

I think it is extremely misogynistic and arrogant to go on and on with this line of why don't you think about it/ you would benefit from a bit more introspection /why don't you consider the possibility of being more flexible?

Doesn't no mean no ? Apparently not.

I see not the slightest difference between what Riley is saying and what is being posted by some on here.

thebewilderness · 02/06/2018 01:51

How arrogant- this sounds exactly what Riley is saying.

No, it doesn't. Not unless you are suffering a pretty extreme case of confirmation bias.

thebewilderness · 02/06/2018 01:50

Maybe after five or six duplicate posts accusing SD of being a misogynist, and some of them being removed, you might reconsider your behavior here, Lass.

LassWiADelicateAir · 02/06/2018 01:40

I understand your point but don't you think there is a difference between saying you 'could' be attracted to a certain group of people if you put your mind to it, and saying that you 'should' put your mind to it otherwise you are a bigot?

No- both seem to be demanding an explanation as to why I say I do not find women sexually attractive.

But nobody is actually asking you to touch a vagina, are they? Just suggesting you think about why you feel that revulsion

Why? I wouldn't dream of telling a lesbian to do think about that- why am I expected to justify my sexual preferences?

The way I interpreted somedykes comment was that maybe straight women could benefit from this introspection too

How arrogant- this sounds exactly what Riley is saying.

Oh I see I have been deleted- what for saying I find the thought of having sex with a woman revolting?

LaSqrrl · 01/06/2018 22:59

OP: and apparently these are basic rad fem ideas, she says

Strange is actually a marxist feminist, not a radical feminist. As thebewilderness has said, she (and a few others) have been kicked out of radfem groups, generally for core inconsistencies towards radical feminism, as well as the attacks.

NeverLovedElvis · 01/06/2018 22:37

But nobody is actually asking you to touch a vagina, are they? Just suggesting you think about why you feel that revulsion.
From talking to friends who are lesbian I get the impression that many lesbian women have considered and examined their sexuality more than many hetero women do. Probably because being straight is considered the default position. The way I interpreted somedykes comment was that maybe straight women could benefit from this introspection too.

thebewilderness · 01/06/2018 21:05

I understand your point but don't you think there is a difference between saying you 'could' be attracted to a certain group of people if you put your mind to it, and saying that you 'should' put your mind to it otherwise you are a bigot?

That seems rather a large difference to me too.
I do not care much for these kinds of discussions because I am opposed to women's no assumed to be the beginning of a negotiation.

LassWiADelicateAir · 01/06/2018 21:03

This reply has been deleted

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NeverLovedElvis · 01/06/2018 20:54

lass I understand your point but don't you think there is a difference between saying you 'could' be attracted to a certain group of people if you put your mind to it, and saying that you 'should' put your mind to it otherwise you are a bigot?
To my mind, the former is food for thought while the latter is deeply unpleasant and entitled.

SuperLoudPoppingAction · 01/06/2018 18:55

www.slate.com/blogs/outward/2016/05/04/over_80_percent_of_bisexuals_end_up_in_straight_relationships_why.html

Not posting this as agreement with the content- just the statistic.
My take on 85% of adult bisexual people being in straight relationships is that patriarchy forces you towards that path.

In that climate, it's easy to think that there are women in straight relationships who might prefer, all things being equal, to be in relationships with women.

Not quite the same as 'all women are innately lesbians' etc but in a similar vein.

SardineReturns · 01/06/2018 18:42

In general there is a world of difference between the age old thing of be-cocked poeple telling lesbians off, and feminists considering what dynamics between the sexes etc would be like if there was no patriarchy, no compulsory heterosexuality etc etc

In much of the world heterosexualiaty is literally or pretty much compulsory in society, in many other parts of the world heterosexuality is still the norm, the big sell from the vast majority of kids stuff etc. And of course a lot of discrimination exists. So yes it's a valid conversation. And that's a difference as well. There is a difference between saying in a world without compulsory heterosexuality (and monogamy tbh) would more people choose partners of either sex, the other argument is towards women who say they are not attracted to men and get loads of shit on the net telling them to shut the fuck up and suck some dick.

I don't understand why anyone would think these are the same.

SardineReturns · 01/06/2018 18:36

Also don't see the parallel.

Conversations between women around sexuality and what things would look like around attraction / relationships in a patriarchy free world are interesting thought experiments. We're not there and we can't know but we can consider whether sexuality would look different / family structures / all sorts of things.

People like RD are saying get with the program and take some cock otherwise you're a bitch and that is not the same at all.