What do your male partners make of GRA

DH wouldn’t have thought too much about it before I mentioned threads from MN. However the men i work with that I’ve spoken to all think it is bonkers. It has come up at a lot at work because some of their toilets have been made gender neutral. Many of the concerns raised on here have come up unprompted in discussion. They do think you can change gender.

Mine gets it -and he got the handmaids tale. He's always been a rational bloke with a good sense of what is fair and just (and what isn't) but having a daughter has made him care more about feminist issues (we met at uni as total equals so he didn't so much see issues in relation to me IYSWIM)

DH thinks it's all mad but also that I'm overreacting and it's a fringe issue. I've yet to convince him of the far-reaching consequences, and we have daughters. I find it really frustrating.

I'm a widow but my late DH was fiercely protective of our DC. I think he would have been fuming his kids could be in any kind of danger. Hell, shortly before he died he was still picking our (then) 16 year old DD up from the bus-stop.

'PC gorn mad'mine said! Seriously though hes signed the petition.

My DH and I argue about this issue whenever I try and talk to him about it! He is very left wing and somehow thinks that although I have always been accepting of everyone, suddenly I've become a raging bigot!

I have tried to explain my concerns, and he thinks I'm overreacting, not about the things I worry about but the possibility that any of it will happen at all. He says Self ID meaning anyone can access safe spaces will not happen and exemptions will remain. I counter that if we stand up against it and protest then it might not happen, but being complacent and assuming it will all be fine will mean it will go through. We managed a conversation the other day where I showed him a lot of the things I've found out and it didn't end up in a row, but I have to be really careful how I approach it with him, he thinks I've gone all right wing and that upsets him.

He keeps quoting the 50% attempt suicide stats, and thinks that because trans people get such a hard time then we should all be nice. He gets defensive when I talk about male violence because NAMALT so it's difficult. He is really gentle and would never hurt anyone, so when I talk about men as a class being a threat to women as a class he gets pissed off and says I shouldn't generalise. I have pointed out that if I was on an otherwise empty train with either just a man late at night or a woman, he would be more concerned about the first scenario.

Anyway, he thinks I'm obsessed and should stop reading about it, but I think it's really important. I try and not mention it too much in case I alienate him further. I plan to send him relevant links as they come up, with actual facts that he can't argue with. The trouble is that only right wing papers like the Daily Mail are reporting the issues, so he discounts it as right wing scaremongering.

Wow that got long, but I've been meaning to start a thread about this to see if I'm the only one having trouble getting the message over IRL. It really upsets me that he thinks I'm being a bigot, but I don't seem able to explain it properly or something.

OH is a mellow soul, the 1st man I've met in my life who is completely non-sexist. I don't think he took much notice of issues until gender-neutral toilet signs went up at his 18 year old's college. He was quizzical. & most unhappy about the connotations. Although he had said re Self-ID before that you'll always, somewhere and everywhere, have a set of insecure men finding ways to put women very firmly in their place as to them, women are the easiest to victimise.

Mine too. Exact same story as you op. Even down to the handmaids tale!

He thinks the whole thing is totally bonkers. Men are not women. If they want to look that way, they are still men. he did think I was over reacting to start with, fortunatly tra's keep doing stuff.

Mine got it right away. We've had many a chat long rant from me about it. He signed and tweeted the petition. We have daughters and a granddaughter so maybe that's part of it, but honestly I think he's always been an ally.

Almost Ex-DH thinks the entire thing is insanity. Thinks transsexualism full stop is insanity. Totally gets the AGP aspect of it. Understands the link with 'transracialism'. He got there on his own - didn't need to convince him of anything.