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Original poster

"Nobody asked women"

43 replies

Juells · 03/05/2018 06:36

I woke up muzzily thinking about the accusations that Mumsnet is a hotbed of hatred and transphobia, and what popped into my head, as if on a billboard in ten foot high letters was

NOBODY ASKED WOMEN

That's it, really. I'm not a feminist, have never belonged to a feminist group or organisation, I'm live-and-let-live, tolerant, neither left nor right... but nobody asked women before deciding that our safe spaces should be shared.

Nobody asked women about the Girl Guides new policy. Nobody asked women if it was OK to make women's toilets gender neutral, while leaving men's single sex. Nobody asked women if they minded sharing changing rooms in swimming pools.

The only place women have to talk about the subject is Mumsnet, and it seems to be under threat as a result.

Will decisions be made about Northern Ireland without asking the people living there? Like hell they will. But not only will women not be asked, they won't be allowed to even discuss it if some people have their way.

Nobody asked women.

OP posts:
Original poster
Juells · 03/05/2018 07:20

@Banana8080

Interested to read you say you're not feminist.

Up until now in my life there hasn't been anything that affected me because of my sex , so rather selfishly I haven't thought much about it ☹️

OP posts:
CoffeeOrSleep · 03/05/2018 07:16

Except people/government did consult with religious leaders over gay rights. This is why we firstly had civil partnerships rather than marriage, and why now we have marriage equality, but churches are exempt from having to provide marriage services equally. Religious leaders were asked - they didn't always get their own way, but were consulted and their opinions were taken into consideration.

I don't agree with a lot of the panic around trans people on here, but I do think the lack of consideration how this will effect woman (and if there's any "opt outs" needed/practical) says a lot about how little many people value woman's need for safe spaces, or indeed need to have an opinion.

Original poster
Juells · 03/05/2018 07:13

Juells no I didn't see it. The disabled a neutral space..

It isn't about being a neutral space, it's about Disabled toilets being lost because they're being turned into Gender Neutral Restrooms.

OP posts:
Banana8080 · 03/05/2018 07:10

Interested to read you say you're not feminist. Feminists aren't necessarily radical, they just want fairness between the sexes, not extra special treatment....e.g. for women to be asked... you sound like a feminist, and I think that's great.

therealposieparker · 03/05/2018 07:09

This needs to be a hashtag.

Original poster
Juells · 03/05/2018 07:07

This came up when I googled gender neutral toilets, and gave me a snigger...
www.collegetimes.com/news/irish-university-gender-neutral-toilets-150730

"With universities often acting as the vanguard of broader societal movements, these sweeping changes surely mark the beginning of the end for gender-specific rooms. While the latent prudishness and deeply embedded sexual shame in Irish culture, as well as just sheer tradition, seem to justify the existence of bathrooms segregated by gender, it's a deeply bizarre idea."

Mr McNab is so woke that he's stratospheric 🤣

OP posts:
lifechangesforever · 03/05/2018 07:03

How do you know 'nobody asked women' how do you know it wasn't women who made these decisions?

I work in government and whilst my own building doesn't have gender neutral toilets, other buildings I've been to do. Hasn't bothered me one iota. What do you do in the toilet, other than go to a private cubicle, do your business and wash your hands?

I understand this is more than just toilets but I'm just not sure that the blanket statement 'nobody asked women' is correct. You can't possibly know that - there isn't going to be a public consultation on every single thing in every single place so naturally, you wouldn't be aware if questions were asked or not.

MoggyP · 03/05/2018 07:02

DP is an interloping typo.

And how 'competing' protected characteristics exist in the public sphere was sorted with regard to faith and homophobia, and it was not the faith groups who defined it. No one asked them.

It was the more oppressed group which defined the situation.

And of course the comparison here is not women to privileged men. It is trans v non-trans and they are the smaller and more oppressed minority.

cindersrella · 03/05/2018 06:59

Juells no I didn't see it. The disabled a neutral space..

cindersrella · 03/05/2018 06:58

Oops wrong button.. I wonder what would come of a survey if there was one put out to women and one put out to men... changing rooms don't bother me (as long as there are cubicles)

Toilets i think they should be separate, but in saying that if I have been out and the women's are over flowing... which happens often i have been known to run into the men's.. so actually I'm not really sure?

Original poster
Juells · 03/05/2018 06:58

Soon there will be men's toilets, ladies toilets & gender neutral toilets... etc

Did you not see the recent thread discussing the toilet situation in various universities? The Women's and Disabled have been made gender neutral. The Men's remain a sacred space.

OP posts:
zzzzz · 03/05/2018 06:57

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

cindersrella · 03/05/2018 06:54

I thought I had missed something then....

Soon there will be men's toilets, ladies toilets & gender neutral toilets... etc

That's is a good point. I have never been asked (yeor known any questions asked

thebewilderness · 03/05/2018 06:51

The larger and less oppressed minority? Women. White males are the smaller and more oppressed minority in the UK. I did not know this.

Original poster
Juells · 03/05/2018 06:51

WTF is the DP faith? 😂

WTF has how faith is being manifested got to do with anything? 😂

WTF has levels of oppression got to do with anything? 😂

I'm not oppressed, and I fucking don't intend to be either.

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AngryAttackKittens · 03/05/2018 06:45

What's a DP faith?

TERFragetteCity · 03/05/2018 06:45

Well, decisions on how faith can be manifested were decided by those outside the DP faith, so no the precedent was set then

Huh?

MoggyP · 03/05/2018 06:42

Well, decisions on how faith can be manifested were decided by those outside the DP faith, so no the precedent was set then.

Now, you probably thought that was right, because the certain aspects ran counter to another group. So you support the approach, but don''t like it when you are the larger and less oppressed minority.