breastfeeding advert inNorhtern Ireland, gives me the rage

I think it's an Irish thing to be overly apologetic. I know my OH would apologise in most of the situations depicted in the ad, so can't see what the issue is?! I think it's a great ad, my DS likes it too and it provoked a great conversation with him about breastfeeding.

I've never seen it as a female thing to always be apologising, I just know that the Irish do it more than most. Someone stepped on my foot once and I apologised.

I have mixed feelings about it- the constant apologising thing is something I do even in a professional setting and I hate it. I shouldn't need or be expected to say sorry for voicing an opinion or "being a bitch" (ie bit telling people what they want to hear) or just apologising for taking too long to get my purse out! I don't want this vein of women feeling like they have to say sorry to people for merely existing to be propagated in the media any more than it is already. But equally the BF being the only thing this wishy-washy character doesn't apologise for is quite charming. The radio ad is awful though- the voice is so whiny.

I know one woman who breastfed here, my mate's mum. And we're 30 this year ffs. There's positives in that my own attitude and that of my friends is "ill give it a go and if it doesn't work out sure I can FF" without feeling like a failure or any of the other negative emotions that often come with being unable to BF successfully. But more so it's very sad that there are so many women who have missed out on being able to even try it due to lack of support or even just knowing someone that did it, rather go straight to the bottle. In the past BF had connotations of being for poor people who couldn't afford to feed their baby formula, or rural catholics who had no choice or used it as a means of contraception. There is definitely still a hangover of that, and that's why some people still have bloody backwards views on it and liken it to being like a cow or whatever.

An example of the attitude more generally here happened recently when I saw a well endowed acquaintance and her newborn, and the baby was hungry and crying and kept turning in to her breast. "She smells the milk", she said, as she asked her partner to hand her the bottle from the nappy bag. She then admitted she hadn't given it a go or even thought about BF as it was gross. Baby was well cared for and obviously loved, but it made me feel really sad despite my "meh" attitude about BF in general.

To be fair it’s reasonable to apologise for your pram getting in peoples way, I do, it actually affects other people around you. It’s not reasonable to apologise for breastfeeding, that’s what the advert is portraying.

Of course it’s ok for formula to be marketed aggressively resulting in the deaths of infants world wide but an advert promoting breastfeeding without shame? How shocking.

Lol...do they @hipsterfun....is it regional generational or just personality do you think??.i have met plenty of people on the other hand who never seem to apologise...even if they are wrong!

It must be a celt thing!!.. I even apologise for things that I havent done

A lot of English people do it too.

It certainly wasn't intended to be disingenuous but if that's how you choose to view it then nothing I can do...

Certainly wasn't a personal attack either...

I haven't made any sweary comments about anyone...or their voices..or there weaknesses...

Maybe we speak different languages and that is the problem..

Again..

I apologise..

Definitely a Celt thing.

I don’t accept your disingenuous apology and you weren’t just expressing your point of view, you were making a personal attack. Big difference.

Get it?

I don't see an issue with it. It shows a person generally apologising in day-to-day life in case of offence/irritation (I do it all the time) except for the one activity that they feel absolutely doesn't require apologising for. The person happens to be a woman as the activity is breastfeeding; I don't see it as making any assumed statements about women or mothers otherwise.

@positivelyperf

Not judging u at all....had no idea you were a radical feminist until you chose to tell me so..

Only expressing my own point of view which I presumed was the whole point of discussion..

But so as not to offend you...

I apologise...

Get it?

nightshade

What’s your problem? I already stated I didn’t care what the advert was about. You know nothing about me and my attitude to women and breastfeeding. Get off your high horse and think about how you’re judging me a fucking radical feminist, that has probably done more for women in my 50yrs than you’ll do in a lifetime, over ONE comment. I’m permitted to dislike an advert without having to justify myself to you. You are the one with issues.

Lol @mustang27

It must be a celt thing!!..

I even apologise for things that I havent done....maybe it's a subconscious self preservation ...developed at times in history when you needed to watch your back!!

I can't speak for NI but in central Scotland it's always been middle/older women tutting and sharing their disgust . Not often 4/5 times in 4 years. That was the one thing that surprised me as I genuinely thought women would not give two hoots.

I agree if they had maybe mixed it up a bit and had others doing things to the main character that required a sorry then the message would be better and not just cementing the women should be sorry culture.

Do you think it will appeal to bf mums that are struggling with public feeding though? I think it might 🤷🏻‍♀️.

I say sorry for everything and it annoys the crap out of me.

Absolutely @badweekgotworse

I totally agree that it is a feminist issue...

Which needs to be understood in the context of the women and the historical background of their country. .

Which is why your post has brought forth strong views...

Not gonna disagree with you @badweekgotworse

What decade were you born in nI and what was your social background ( that's a rhetorical question)!

Those who are comfortable with breastfeeding will breastfeed..

The adverts are usually aimed at promoting it to women who aren't or are too embarrassed to try it for whatever reason...

Lack of confidence poor body image and worrying about social norms are all up there in the reasons not to..

I imagine that's why the advertisers have chosen to go the route they have...

And to clarify I also have longterm breastfed in ni...am from ni ..have social worked in ni and been previously very involved in la leche ni...the la leche philosophyou would be one of support and encouragement to develop confidence and understanding..

On the flip side, all the stuff she’s apologising for us stuff any childcarer could be doing, man or woman.

The one thing she isn’t apologising for is someone only women can do.

I quite like it.

I do agree with you @Tommytucked.

If you look at the profile of many third world countries that have been targeted by formula companies at the point of social development thenvironment northern ireland fits that profile..

My mother still has my hospital card which is printed by cow and gate in the 70s...a time of political discord war rationing and poverty...

The Irish were seen as backward and under developed...formula companies took full advantage of this ....goes back to the victorian era of science equating to superiority and nature belonging to the peasants...

Northern Ireland by most westernised standards is only in the infancy of womens rights...

I personally know a lot of timid women who have been hindered in their development and put off breastfeeding for exactly the comments expressed above...

Anything that normalises breastfeeding has to be a good thing.

Looking at all the occasions when she apologises, I think a dad pushing his baby would likely do the same. She's not really apologising with any sincerity, it's just a custom, people do say sorry a lot. I don't know, maybe I'm wrong. Sorry!

That Joey Salads video...I wonder how long they spent filming that to find those outrageous responses. They were also being a bit ostentatious about it didn't you think? I have fed three babies everywhere you can imagine and in several countries and haven't had any bad reactions - not openly shared anyway. She was being a bit "are you seeing this? It's my breast - does it bother you? I hope so!"

I suppose it depends where these experiments take place. A cafe in a middle-class part of London or a sleepy mid-western town in the US.

Ironic however that it's a breastfeeding advert of a women that grates on you...

Any male adverts that grate equally??