Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Feminism: chat

Original poster

Ethical porn for teens

64 replies

ObviouslyNamedchanged · 11/03/2018 21:57

Okaaaay, I'm sure I've read about porn produced my women and sort of softer?

So basically teen ds know how I feel about porn and understand why............but are there any porn sites like what I have mentioned, that They could be pointed to?

God I know this is a ridiculous question and situation. But I would really like them to understand sex properly, sensual. Not degrading, strangulation, sluts getting banged, yanked about ect.....

I don't know what else to say, but hopefully you get the jist.

OP posts:
Original poster
ObviouslyNamedchanged · 11/03/2018 23:49

Snibble

Same here, smoking by 13 having sex by 14, partying, drinking and taking drugs, 14 up wards.

Naice home back ground.

OP posts:
SnibbleAgain · 11/03/2018 23:44

I put the middle class thing as when I relate stories or remember it sounds really bad, the point being that there's no telling who is up to what and often posh kids (from what I've heard) are the worst of all but they get bought out of trouble so it's all under wraps

SnibbleAgain · 11/03/2018 23:41

I think some pragmatism is required.

I feel the same about other risk behaviour in teens as well. I'm in the they're probably going to do it so let's give there info, while telling them they don't have to, even if everyone else says they are.

I watched porn, took drugs, stayed out all night and was having sex well before 18. That was the norm in my area, and we were all very middle class.

I wouldn't show then porn obviously but have had a couple of agree appropriate convos with 10yo DD already. So if and when someone shows her/ she finds what we all know is out there, she is pre warned and armed to some extent.

Original poster
ObviouslyNamedchanged · 11/03/2018 23:39

I not encouraging them to look at porn, they know dam well how much I don't like porn.

Being realistic, is the fact that their friends already watch it have it on there phones, talk about ect.......

How many teens are not going to do something because "mummy doesn't like it" "mummy told me not to"

I was pondering the point that I had heard of women made porn, I made a thread have had some decent responses.

As I've already said I hadn't really thought ahead as to how I would 'let them know about and alternative to the porn industry' or 'point them in that direction', if need be.

OP posts:
Mouthtrousersafrocknowandthen · 11/03/2018 23:35

Yep, there is an 18 warning on the link I posted.

Good luck with the abstinence mission.

You are in a world where we are trying to campaign against pre teens from experiencing in the same online world where they are two clicks away from the most debased behaviour possible, the same world in which they can choose to be male or female at the ingestion of a few pills. This what is happening to children. This is all part of the same story. Its desperately unpleasant but it is the world we have sat back and let happen around us.

FissionChips · 11/03/2018 23:32

There’s a book written for teens by someone Dutch or maybe Scandinavian. It includes photos of real teens in relationships

I hope you don’t mean naked under 18’s.

AssignedPuuurfectAtBirth · 11/03/2018 23:28

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

CertainHalfDesertedStreets · 11/03/2018 23:25

This is a horrible thread. It's child abuse to show or encourage a child to look at porn.

TrollTheRespawnJeremy · 11/03/2018 23:11

Ohjoysextoy is a comic strip led sex-positive blog that's used to assist sexual education in the US. It links to some ethical and consensual 'normal' porn that isnt all berserk positions and screeching.

Mouthtrousersafrocknowandthen · 11/03/2018 23:07

She spoke to me, I was divorced at 50 and young men were attracted to me and treated me to their porniified version of sex.

I am mature and confident enough to actually stop men behaving that way to me but it made me stop short and have conversations with my two DSs and explain to them that porn imagery was not what they should do to the women they are with, this is an ongoing conversation we are having.

We must talk to our youngsters about this. My parents never protected me in any practical way, I am not making that mistake.

Devilishpyjamas · 11/03/2018 22:51

There’s a book written for teens by someone Dutch or maybe Scandinavian. It includes photos of real teens in relationships. Talks a lot about things like consent.

Going to google to see if I can remember the name

Original poster
ObviouslyNamedchanged · 11/03/2018 22:50

NotAllTimsWearCapes
Grin

OP posts:
Original poster
ObviouslyNamedchanged · 11/03/2018 22:49

Thank you Mouthtrousersafrocknowandthen

What she says is in that link is where I'm coming from. I'll have a look at her website.

OP posts:
NotAllTimsWearCapes · 11/03/2018 22:49

I know! I hadn't thought far enough ahead as to how I would errrr... point them in the right direction grin

Grin

“Seen any good movies recently Mum?”

“Well, now you mention it son, I have....”

AngryAttackKittens · 11/03/2018 22:44

There is no ethical porn. Even if there was, I can't imagine that being pointed towards it by his mum would be anything other than excruciatingly uncomfortable for a young man, and can't imagine him wanting to sit down for an afternoon of mum-facilitated porn viewing. That's just awkward.

Original poster
ObviouslyNamedchanged · 11/03/2018 22:41

Mum approved porn. Can see the kids being all for that!

I know! I hadn't thought far enough ahead as to how I would errrr... point them in the right direction Grin

OP posts:
Mouthtrousersafrocknowandthen · 11/03/2018 22:41

She does not pull any punches, she may not be the woman you want you child to meet but I think she is worth listening to.

Original poster
ObviouslyNamedchanged · 11/03/2018 22:38

It's not my preferred method, as have used other methods, and am very frank and open to questions. Which so far is working well. As they are open and are not afraid to ask stuff.

The porn side, is more about how much I know teens are getting into it, and getting addicted and normalizing shit. Yes I've talked them all about that too. But porn is everywhere.

Yes I think if I had a DD I would have done the same so far, if she was curious about porn then yes probably.

OP posts:
thebewilderness · 11/03/2018 22:37

Ethical porn is an oxymoron.

Mouthtrousersafrocknowandthen · 11/03/2018 22:36

Cindy Gallop did a TED talk on this a few years back - this is her.

talkabout.makelovenotporn.tv/2018/03/09/the-cindy-gallop-guide-to-turning-a-cheeky-topic-into-a-serious-business-virgin/

No idea if its suitable for teenagers but Cindy Gallop is about making love, not porn.

NotAllTimsWearCapes · 11/03/2018 22:29

Mum approved porn. Can see the kids being all for that! Grin

Original poster
ObviouslyNamedchanged · 11/03/2018 22:29

I did have a quick Google about feminist porn, but it was mainly articles about the industry. Then I thought of asking on here.
Thank you Snibble

They know not watching porn is option I would most appreciate.Smile

OP posts:
SnibbleAgain · 11/03/2018 22:28

I think DDs will be looking too tbh

SnibbleAgain · 11/03/2018 22:28

Google doesn't have much I only had a quick look.

Prob best to avoid the sex education on porn hub Hmm

ItsAllGoingToBeFine · 11/03/2018 22:25

Out of interest, if you had a DD rather than a DS would this still be your preferred method of sex education?

Swipe left for the next trending thread