Celebrating being female

This thread is wonderful and is making me tear up a little.

In a good way.

Mitochondrial DNA is fascinating. I also like the fact that the egg which becomes us, is made in our grandmother's body

I remember sitting up in the middle of the night with PFB DS and coming up with the absolutely massive revelation that my mother had done this with me, and her mother with her, and all the mothers before that and I felt so very interconnected and completely overwhelmed. So I sat there and bawled my eyes out. Someone told me it was probably PND but I think 2 weeks with barely any sleep since the day before I gave birth may have had something to do with it.

I have been listening to today's episode of Menopause week on Womans Hour.

Information on puberty, periods, contraception, pregnancy and menopause is vital for women to be able to live their lives in this world.

We grow up minding our own business and our bodies remind us they are there. Menopause transition is a particular example of this - you just get your life on track as the children grow up and Wham - your body hits you with something you were not expecting and didn't particularly want. Mind and body are so interlinked.

I love mitochondrial DNA too. I had a lovely warm glowy feeling thinking about my mum (sadly died a number of years back) - at first I thought "I have a son (whom I love to bits) there goes her DNA", then thought... no I had a sister, who had two daughters, one of whom has had a daughter - it's all still there, going strong into another generation.

and now I’m off to read up on mitochondrial dna

Mitochondrial DNA is fascinating. I also like the fact that the egg which becomes us, is made in our grandmother's body.

great post Annwithnoe

Sashh thanks for reminding me about mitochondrial dna - I love that too.

Just to lower the tone, multiple orgasms.

Mitochondrial DNA, it links us back to our first female ancestor in a direct line. I don't have children or sisters but my mitochondrial DNA has been passed by my cousin to her daughter and via more distant second cousins to others.

Annwithnoe Please keep posting!

Seconded!

This is such a fantastic thread - really a classic! Thank you to all the thoughtful, funny and wise women who have posted

annewithnoe great post and I am so with you. With the Adam &Eve story - even as a kid I thought 'woman from a man's rib? Nah Man from a woman's womb is how we get here' - and so true about rights of passage etc.

Annwithnoe Please keep posting!

That point about men's rituals is great. Now you mention it, so true.

Great post Ann have never thought about mens rites of passage like that

Well that was a cracking first post in feminism then Annwithnoe!

I never post in feminism because I feel so inarticulate compared to you lot but I want to add my bit here:

I absolutely resonate to the psychic roar. Giving birth for me was a primeval experience and afterwards I felt like a goddess of femininity. I was a bit taken aback that DH wasn’t as impressed with my post-birth body

However, when I think of the women I’ve admired across my lifetime, apart from my amazing mother and grandmother there are two lesbian couples that stand out for me. One was my aunt and her partner who were just amazing, articulate, wonderful, clever, warm people who lived an entirely different kind of life which seemed so peaceful and respectful. And the other couple are/were Katherine Zappone and her partner Ann Louise Gillian who did the most amazing work educating the women of Tallaght, Dublin. Their intuitive grasp of the feminine energy shone through in the centre they created.

I’ve often thought it ironic that so many cultures and religions create rituals to mark the stages of life that mimic so closely the natural stages of a woman’s life. Boys are “initiated” into manhood by a ritualistic blood letting (menses) or painful ordeal (birth). Monks wake at night to pray (feed babies) or keep vigil all night (nursing sick children through the night)....etc

I’ve also long suspected that the Judeo-Christian tradition got the story of Adam and Eve backwards, that woman was created in the image and likeness of God the Creator and man, with his protective strength was the helpmeet.

I like and respect the indefatigably optimistic cut of your jib in the face of my curmudgeonliness about people, Guardian.

That sounds a bit like the Generation X nihilism that I am so glad have got away from

Kids are getting taught a lot of eco-awareness at school these days and I think with the right education and parenting there is real hope for the world and future for the human race (and all the other species)

And human beings are completely fucking amazing too - along with our highly evolved technology and culture - and how amazing that you have a life of the mind - a career of writing and research! The only species able to do that!

I am certainly grateful to my feminist foremothers who fought to gain for women the rights to opt out of some life experiences that, to me, would be intolerable, and to opt into others that have given me so much satisfaction.

Not so sure I think the human race really needs to be carried on, though. The planet and other species might well do better without us. But that's another debate for another day.

Lots of love to you Glittery - you so accurately describe the feeling "everything in me was screaming that I had to be where the baby was".

I know that feeling in part when I had to hand mine over to scbu. It makes me feel such a deep connection to women who have lost babies or mc. I had no idea about it before having children.

But Niskas I also totally get what you are saying. And you are right about how at times "someone/thing being 100% dependent on me feels suffocating and oppressive." The bizarre thing about motherhood for me is - despite not being that into kids, especially babies beforehand (eg finding babies crying on the bus really annoying), motherhood changed me - sort of flooded with love - hormones maybe - (oxytocin?), which helps me through the mega-clingy phases where I can't even go to the toilet without "muuu-uum!" and also gave me that impetus croissant talks about to "be there washing uniform at 11pm having not sat down for 12 hours because [I] will not under any circumstances see their children go to school in dirty clothes, no matter how tired [I am], no matter how much [I'd] like a rest." I can completely understand though, how it isn't an attractive prospect and some women want to opt out of it.

But if no women gave birth, then none of us would be here now. Even if we don't want to or can't be mothers or we don't want to be defined by it, it is worth remembering that we all owe our lives to women. And our biological-women-birthed life is definitely worth celebrating women for.

Oprah Winfrey did have a child lemons when she was a teenager.

Equally, professionally, I think a lot of women end up dropping out of careers not just because of the double load of childcare/housework and paid work, but because they can't see the value in continuing to play the game that many men play in business, which is to try to big yourself up while doing the minimum amount of actual valuable work. Many women in banking, for example, get to a certain point and think 'what the fuck am I wasting my life on this shit for'?

So true.

Thank you also glittery. I'm sorry for your losses

Brilliant post Niskasrevenge

Having posted a "female biology" type post myself doesn't mean I consider other achievements to be lesser or meaningless. We all have a million achievements that are not related specifically to our sex.
What strikes me about your post is how every one of your incredible achievements will have been hard won, against an undercurrent of sexism pulling women one way, and pushing men the other.

Like that quote about Ginger Rogers getting less credit than Fred Astaire, despite doing everything he did, only backwards and in heels.

I found that a really interesting perspective Niskasrevenge. Thank you.