Woman requests a female nurse. She gets a transwoman instead.

I'm so annoyed I forgot - Cheers!

Its NYE Irk if you please

CosmicCanary

CosmicCanary [tea]

cafeaulaitpourvous

Ok - I smell bullshit - and I am TERFY mc TERF!

It's not bullshit I'm afraid, I know the woman involved and I believe she is telling the absolute truth. It's on the basis of this that I am having to look at alternatives for getting my PAP smear done than at my GP. I am finally undergoing intensive therapy for CPTSS after abuse and the surgery cannot guarantee that I will be able to have a female HCP for a smear. I'm a few years overdue now as well, but there is no way on this earth that I can have a man near me in that way, possibly ever again.

I had to leave and hide the other thread.
Can I stay here for a bit as I would like to discuss and read the content

Personally it doesn't bother me whether my qualified medical practitioner is male or female. I've had numerous tests and gynaecological surgery performed excellently by both male and female practitioners. But I absolutely defend the right for a person to specify the sex of the person who treats them if they wish to do so, whether for personal or religious reasons. The patient's wishes should outweigh the medical practitioner's right to be regarded as female.

I have a history of severe trauma and PTSD, and my GP does my smear. I dont even have to ask, she just sorts it. At the clinic all the nurses who do smears are female. I wouldnt mind male staff dfor something like a vaccine, but there's no way I could have male staff for a gyne exam. Its not a choice.

People who think its a choice are immensely privileged. Its no more a choice than choosing to not react to a car backfire when you have shell shock.

Has anyone had a smear test done by a male nurse before? I've always assumed the practitioner would be female. I've never thought to request a female. I have no history of trauma which warrants me requesting a female but I shouldn't have to. Smears are an intimate procedure, in my experience carried out behind a closed door with just me and the nurse in the room. For that reason I will always want a female hcp. For emergencies or surgery- I've had an emergency ERPC - I don't care as it's not just one hcp and me.

I wonder how many males across the UK are employed to do smear tests.

Yes, this is exactly the kind of scenario we were told would never happen. Along with rapists 'identifying' their way into women's prisons. Males winning women's sports events and awards, schoolgirls forced to change for PE in front of boys. Women being shoved and punched for having an opinion, by men who then claim to be the real victims.

Then it happens, and we're told it didn't really happen, then that it doesn't matter, or that it doesn't mean anything, or that we should stop whining about it... and another boundary has been destroyed, another abuse normalised. They know exactly what they're doing, and it looks a whole lot like classic abuser tactics.

But I thought that This Will Never Happen? When this has been raised as a concern, we've been told that it won't happen and to stop getting all hysterical and giddy about imaginary trans women and intimate care situations.

And here it is.

I predict that the response from transactivists and their supporters will be:

1. Didn't happen. Fake news
2. This person is Not Really Trans
3. Tumbleweed.

Though maybe, just maybe, it will peak trans another few like Maid's husband.

I personally wouldn't have a problem with who does my smear but I totally believe that a woman should have total control over who has contact with her genitals whatever the circumstances.

For me, it is yet another circumstance where a woman's control over her body is compromised.

When I was a student I worked as a chaperone in a gynocological unit, sitting in with male gynochologists examining patients. Will this be the case if a gynocologist decides to identify as female?

The nurse “had an obviously male appearance . . . close-cropped hair, a male facial appearance and voice, large number of tattoos and facial stubble”, she said.

Logically, I don't see why transwomen should need to present in a feminine way. I have days where I want to wear trousers, no make up and not 'perform femininity'. Wear what you want, look like what you want. Whatever.

So I don't see the issue with this transwoman's short hair, tattoos and even the stubble, logically I suppose.

Whatever she looks like, the problem is that despite identifying as a woman, she remains biologically male.

And this patient requested a biological woman.

Even if she was wearing make up, a skirt and had no stubble I suspect the patient would still have felt uncomfortable.

The nurse “had an obviously male appearance . . . close-cropped hair, a male facial appearance and voice, large number of tattoos and facial stubble”, she said.

It mystifies me that people can read this and think anyone with an issue is transphobic. I don't give a shit what people wear or say they are, though I think boys particularly should be able to wear pink/makeup/whatever without that making them less male. But this nurse wasn't trans in any way other than a feeling. I feel like I'm still a size 10 until I look in a mirror... doesn't make it so.

Good news Maid

Good stuff Maid.

Trust policy is to consider seriously all requests for clinicians of a particular gender.”

Grrr. I don't give a stuff what they're wearing or how they do their hair or what colours/toys they like, I want someone of the biological sex I request. Transmen HCPs, yes that's absolutely fine thank you.

Well well.

My lefty liberal, feminist ally husband, who has to date bitterly rejected my concerns about the GRA and the TRA movement in general, who has called me a bigot with looks of horror in his eyes, has now hit #peaktrans.

I hope that there are others who have dismissed the valid concerns of females, who have accused us of fantasy regarding the implications of the GRA, are similarly reconsidering.

I'm one of those thick-skinned women who couldn't give a stuff if the person with the speculum is a man or a woman. However, I'm also one of those thick-skinned women who isn't worried about being assertive.

So, sure as shit, I'm going to insist on a female HCP for anything intimate from now on. And complain like crazy if I get any push back. Since all this rests on women socialised to put up with things and not complain, I might as well use my thick-skinned ways on behalf of everyone else.

After sexual violence, it took me several defaulted smear appointments to get in for mine. I only went in as I knew my GP and she was brilliant. I would have been horrified to have been met with a man, and then been made to feel I was unreasonable for being horrified.

I too am glad the Times is highlighting these issues.

Anxiety sometimes manifests as aggression because its a natural defensive mechanism.

Putting a HCP in a situation which makes a patient feel threatened, is a risk to the HCP as well as the patient in extreme circumstances.

This is well known. This isn't the fault of a patient but a natural response from someone who has an illness.

After a home visit which went badly wrong due to a total lack of sensitivity and a confrontational midwife, I made a complaint stressing this, which was upheld. Not only this they acknowledged that it was fair, constructive and was about protecting staff as well as patients.

I didn't get aggressive but stated that they were aware of the issue and their lack of sensitivity made me feel very threatened. I was extremely distressed and it damaged my trust with HCP (which was strangely enough one of the causes of anxiety in the first place).

If the same thing happening with another patient might have different more serious consequences. Which they agreed with.

They asked permission for my case to be used as a training example.

Proposed changes to the law could make anxiety based on trauma illegal - effectively criminalising victims and the sick.

Good grief. This needs stopping and soon.

This is absolutely disgusting.

they didn’t send a chaperone for an intimate procedure so they considered him female

It doesn't matter what sex the HCP is, they should have a chaperone anyway when performing an intimate examination on a patient. It's to cover the HCP, so if the patient complains that something untoward happens, there's another witness who can give their account.

That's best practice though. I have had smears and examinations where there should have been a chaperone present, and wasn't.

Datun. The over riding feeling that people are defended against is anxiety. Any of us could be raped, some of us already have and some of us dearly love people who have been raped. Even as I type this I experience intolerable feelings. Today those feelings are primarily sadness, another day it could be anger.

People have very strong psychological defence mechanisms that work outside of conscious awareness. These are usually functional and help us all cope with daily life without becoming neurotic. However, they can also be catastrophic, such as when professionals fail to spot massive risk.

When I was training I did a role play exercise whereby I was meeting, for the first time, a ‘mother’ whose child was terminally ill. During the exercise the ‘mother’ disclosed that the child had been conceived through rape. I completely missed this and was gob smacked when I watched the video back. I still find it shocking that I didn’t process this information and attend to it. Thank god it was a role play.