Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Feminism: chat

Original poster

Christmas sexism

37 replies

Linguini · 21/12/2017 08:20

I'm still annoyed by something that happened yesterday.
Very hectic morning, I had a lot on my mind. I was very busy thinking about 100 things whilst having to get a taxi (because I was in a rush and had already been sent to the wrong location).

Taxi driver-
"Cheer up. It's nearly Christmas".

This is the first thing he said to me apart from "where to".

If I was a massive bloke do you think he would have interrupted his train of thought and demanded a smile?

I suddenly felt very self conscious like I should have been making more effort to brighten up the taxi man's day... Had to stop thinking about what I needed to, and explain myself "sorry I'm having a bad morning... yada yada"

Women really are not allowed to sit and think are we.

What would you have said??

OP posts:
deydododatdodontdeydo · 21/12/2017 08:44

He wouldn't have said it to a man.

But: I suddenly felt very self conscious like I should have been making more effort to brighten up the taxi man's day.

A man would never have this reaction either. Neither would I to be honest. Maybe it's the way you have been socialised to behave, and lots of people will agree that this is the way women are socialised to behave, but I wouldn't and plenty of other women wouldn't.
I don't think there's any need to aggressively t ake him to task for it, I probably would have just said "er, no thanks, you first" or something and never have thought of it again.

LaContessaDiPlump · 21/12/2017 08:44

I think, as a rapidly aging woman, I will take it upon myself to tell men to cheer up if I don't feel they're happy enough. If they look sufficiently amazed then I may ask them if they've ever been told that before.

I predict a slew of 'no's and Blush faces....

Original poster
Linguini · 21/12/2017 08:41

It makes the woman self conscious and embarrassingly obedient.

OP posts:
Jigglytuff · 21/12/2017 08:37

Saying “Cheer up love” is not pleasant Hmm

Shockers · 21/12/2017 08:35

I’m not sure a man would say that to a man he didn’t know.

Original poster
Linguini · 21/12/2017 08:35

Resting neutral face. Not even mildly downcast.

OP posts:
Original poster
Linguini · 21/12/2017 08:34

You really think men get told to cheer up?
It's never happened to dp.

OP posts:
Poshindevon · 21/12/2017 08:32

The taxi driver did not say that to you because you were female. He said it to cheer you up, he did not demand a smile or expect you to brighten his day.
Cant you accept he was just being pleasant?
You had to stop your train of thought to hail a taxi give instructions and climb in so dont claim you had to stop thinking about your oh so important stuff just to speak to the taxi driver.
You need to get over yourself and stop looking for slights against women where there are none.
I am a woman and I sit and think all the time.
What would I have said in reply.? Something like " oh you know one of those days" No yada yada or explanation and then carried on with my oh so important thinking in the back of the cab.

Jigglytuff · 21/12/2017 08:28

Of course it’s sexist. Blokes telling women to smile always is. We’re not supposed to be real humans - just adornment. If we’re not smiling, we’re failing in that task.

ISaySteadyOn · 21/12/2017 08:26

No, I agree with you OP. Cheer up is very much something that is said to women by men. And it is very irritating especially when you are trying to think something through.

elQuintoConyo · 21/12/2017 08:24

Annoying but i would have said nothing. Perhaps a jolly "but i don't want to" with a Paddington Bear stare. Or a terse "my My Y has just died. Take me to X place, please".

Or leave it till you're out of the cab, not so caged in.

It makes me rage but internally i just think bland words, unimaginative bollocks, just ignore it.

Crispbutty · 21/12/2017 08:23

It’s not sexist. He could have said the same to any male passenger. I certainly wouldn’t still be giving it any headspace a day later either.

Swipe left for the next trending thread