Christmas sexism

Paddington would’ve been proud, Linguini!

No, he'd never say this to a man.

Also, cheer up its almost Christmas! You've already chosen all the gifts for yours and your partner's families, bought the gifts, done the online food shop (if you bagged a slot back in October), cleaned the house, put up the decorations... now just to wrap all the fucking gifts and spend your entire Christmas making sure it's brilliant for everyone else.

Yeah, what a time of cheer. I actually love Christmas but it's probably the most knackering time of the whole year.

How about smiling and asking 'oh, just out of interest, do you ever say that to men?'

Yep - name the problem. I do this - it doesn't tend to go down very well, but I'm not scared of letting sexist wankers know that I view them with utter contempt.

It’s not sexist. He could have said the same to any male passenger

Could have. But wouldn't have. Never, ever happens.

Shockers, you think very differently than I do about these wankers.

The church was on Lavender Hill, so quite a busy street. From his reaction, I honestly don’t think he knew I was about to turn- he looked like he’d been slapped. My aunt died at 40, so it was a particularly difficult day for everyone.

I bet he hasn’t said it since.

an undertaker? No, sorry, I think he did that on purpose!

A man once said this to me as I was walking to my aunt’s funeral. He was one of the undertakers, leaning on a wall outside the church. His face blanched visibly when I turned onto the church path.

I like to think my aunt would have found his discomfort amusing.

oh writersblock, that's the worst one

there was one place where I was actually forewarned about this guy and told "it's not nice, he will try to hug you as well, but he's very lonely and sad" - I wonder why?! - anyway, he came to my desk, I kept looking at my computer and said "no, I am NOT kissing you".

then he left and the women said "OMD no one's ever done that, thanks"!

he'd been there 16 years. I'm beginning to wish companies would actually start "no touching" rules.

It’s defibitely sexist. A bloke a work told me yesterday I should give him a kiss because it’s Christmas. Honestly, where do these men get off?

I hate bwingcpit in that spot also OP. You're forced to perform and smile or share your reasons for not looking jolly or be confrontational which will be met with ' touchy, I was just being friendly'.

How about smiling and asking 'oh, just out of interest, do you ever say that to men?' Put the onus on them.

Yes I hate this too
like you're meant be smiling AT ALL TIMES.

one of my friends actually tried grinning like a loon all the way from Underground to street level at Euston station, just to see what happened. She had no fewer than three men comment how nice to see a woman with a happy smile.

this just doesn't happen to men.

Yes it doesn't even make sense. If the man assumes that the woman is failing in her smiling duty because she is not cheerful, how does he think that him saying "cheer up" will resolve her mood? Unless he assumes that women have no internal life or real problems, and that all women live to have attention from men?

Ok so just texted DH and two DBs, all in late 40s. Each has now confirmed that as adults they have NEVER been told to cheer up by a stranger.

"The taxi driver did not say that to you because you were female. He said it to cheer you up, he did not demand a smile or expect you to brighten his day."

How does telling someone to cheer up actually cheer them up?

Ugh I hate this and of course its sexist. I have a great withering blank death stare I reserve for comments like this.

Why any man thinks that a woman will suddenly start smiling at him because she's been told to cheer up I really don't know. It makes the stupid assumption that if you're not simpering away then you're unhappy, rather than simply busy or preoccupied.

That's unpleasant - he has no idea what's going on in your life. You might be going through a really tough time. It would be totally different if it was a friend of yours saying it.
There's an underlying aggressive tone to it isn't there. 'Smile now', is what he's saying. He would never say it to a man for fear of getting punched. Therefore sexist.

Of course it's sexist. Men never get told this.

'You are not performing femininity adequately'

I definitely experience 'cheer up' as a criticism

I would never react like you did, i would react like a man, ergo you're being ridiculous is not a nice thing to insinuate to women. Bravo for fucking you.

Eurgh. I hate ‘cheer up love, might never happen/it’s nearly Christmas/ you’re too pretty to look sad’ 🤮

I hate the presumption. Christmas could be a really bad time for a lot of people. And no, it doesn’t get said to men!