Are terms like Male Tears unhelpful?

58 replies

Micaela64 · 18/12/2017 09:56

Think about it, we try to explain to men that the patriarchy keeps them from expressing emotions and forces them to be "macho" and emotionless, then any time a man complains about what they perceive as injustices or hardships they’re shamed with comments like "LOL, male tears’" or "fragile masculinity!" instead of respectful counter arguments or attempt at understanding. Can men have emotions or not? It's the adult equivalent of telling male children "boys don't cry!"

How are we meant to argue that feminism can benefit them too and stop them facing the pressure of always living up to stereotypical roles if we then mock them for expressing emotions and feelings? It feels hypocritical.

I tire of seeing the level of debate descend into this sort of name-calling under every feminism article or video. When gay people were fighting for their rights they understood they had to get straight people on side to make real change. Maybe we need to learn from them a little?

OP posts:

MephistophelesApprentice · 18/12/2017 10:35

I should point out, that the most frequent place I've seen it used is on websites dominated by young third/fourth wave feminists, many of whom are of your pro-trans faction. I don't imagine many of the anti-trans feminists here are of the age or faction-loyalty to see it often employed.

MephistophelesApprentice · 18/12/2017 10:32

It's just another way that feminism promotes conventional gender roles while pretending they do nothing of the sort.

It's how they try and force men's expression of emotion to conform with women's expression of emotion - the fact that only tears, not anger can be an expression of pain or loss (unless, of course, it's a feminist reacting to a loss of rights, in which case rage can be expressed in the vilest forms possible quite legitimately).

It's deliberately demeaning, toxically hypocritical and simply reinforces the understanding held by many that feminism is just an academic rationale for contempt towards men. Nietzschean slave morality at it's finest.

WhatWouldGenghisDo · 18/12/2017 10:21

I've only heard the term 'male tears' in the context of people complaining that feminists use it. I've yet to hear a feminist use it or use it myself.

I don't recall ever directly accusing anyone of 'fragile masculinity' either, but if I were to say or think anything along those lines it would be in a context where they were expressing unreasonable levels of anger, not sadness or vulnerability.

(I don't think men need more encouragement to express anger, on the whole)

WTAFisthisshit · 18/12/2017 10:21

Ah thanks Cherry I've learnt my something new for the day I'll go and do something useful now

CherryChasingDotMuncher · 18/12/2017 10:17

In other words it's used for when men's feelings are irrelevant, but they insist on making heir voices heard and moaning about 'equality'

CherryChasingDotMuncher · 18/12/2017 10:14

'Male tears' isn't used to mock men who cry, but when they moan about a privilege being revoked or women getting their own spaces. For example, women only swimming sessions, I would say men who object and kick up a stink can bugger off with their Male tears.

WTAFisthisshit · 18/12/2017 10:09

I've never heard the term 'male tears' or mocked a man for crying or seen anyone else do that, so I'm not really able to help

I'm sure lots of the experienced posters here will be able to though.

AssassinatedBeauty · 18/12/2017 10:09

I don't think those kinds of responses are made to men showing genuine emotional and respectful responses to feminist posts.

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