Are terms like Male Tears unhelpful?

When gay people were fighting for their rights they understood they had to get straight people on side to make real change. Maybe we need to learn from them a little?

Why isnt womens 'side' the default choice for men? Why are there sides? We are asking for rights which already exist in law.

I'll see your male tears, and raise you 2 women dead a week at the hands of men. I mean seriously how is this even contraversial to point out?

"Oh no a feminist said a mean thing about men one time!" faints but apparently one feminist says a mean thing and ALL feminists everywhere are personally responsibly. Yet point out men rape and murder, and suddenly NAMALT.

If you can't spot the double standard then you wouldn't be able to find your own ass with both hands and Radar.....

After all, a few minutes reading on this (relatively respectful) forum will show that any concern for men's rights is regarded as absurd.

I have never seen an issue raised about the disadvantages men face here - such as high suicide rates, homelessness and mental health issues - being described as absurd. What I have seen described as absurd (and rightly so) is when people look at what a women's issue like high rates of rape, and pipe up "but men get falsely accused of rape all the time". In other words, people call out posters when they try and take a woman's issue and centre men in it.

I don't believe for even a jiffy that PricklyBall did her gig out of concern for men.

Why the fuck not? Do you think she did it just so she could wave it in your face?

Why do you think I think you're not communicating in good faith? And you haven't answered the question, as I'm sure you know.

IrkThePurist

What would I learn going to a place where everyone already agrees with me?

AssassinatedBeauty

It seems a bit weird to instantly assume I'm not communicating in good faith and yet, here we are.

@MephistophelesApprentice why do you think that about @PricklyBall? Seems a bit weird to instantly disbelieve her?

Why dont you go to the forums that use the terms you object to and have your say there?

Nope, not familiar at all. You're projecting your own prejudices and assumptions onto this rather than looking at the reality of it.

We could ping-pong that accusation back and forth for a while, and neither of us would get any joy from it.

You've also just ignored a post on this thread showing genuine concern for male issues.

I don't believe for even a jiffy that PricklyBall did her gig out of concern for men.

I'm really pleased to hear that Cherry is right as I can't actually work out what Meph is trying to say.

What's the SCUM manifesto?

I like wazzocksplained I'm adding that to 'give your head a shite' 'wankspangle', 'fucknuckle' and a very long word beginning with v as the best things I've learnt recently.

Nope, not familiar at all. You're projecting your own prejudices and assumptions onto this rather than looking at the reality of it.

You've also just ignored a post on this thread showing genuine concern for male issues.

AssassinatedBeauty

I intensely doubt a feminist can/will perceive a difference between a post made out of genuine concern for men's rights and an 'absurd' post. After all, a few minutes reading on this (relatively respectful) forum will show that any concern for men's rights is regarded as absurd.

What you're describing is the same phenomenon when sexist men on a forum mock a woman for getting angry, or say they can't listen to BLM activists because they're being 'too angry.' It's the attempt to use mockery to exert control over a activists who aren't being nice enough. Sound familiar?

AssassinatedBeauty

I intensely doubt a feminist can/will perceive a difference between a post made out of genuine concern for men's rights and an 'absurd' post. After all, a few minutes reading on this (relatively respectful) forum will show that any concern for men's rights is regarded as absurd.

What you're describing is the same phenomenon when sexist men on a forum mock a woman for getting angry, or say they can't listen to BLM activists because they're being 'too angry.' It's the attempt to use mockery to exert control over a activists who aren't being nice enough. Sound familiar?

I know it's a tired old stereotype, but it does feel a bit 'bingo'y when these things get brought up.

Also, so lovely to have words used by women wazzocksplained to us again. It's always such a refreshing thing when it happens, reminds me what we're up against.

Never heard a feminist mocking a man for showing emotions over genuine issues. The male tears trope is about the crocodile tears MREs shed for imagined privilege they believe women hold.

Suggesting feminists mock genuine displays of emotion from men is pretty much par for the MRE course anyway, so I'm hardly surprised it's been dredged up out of the aVfM vaults here.

I have only ever seen it used either as CherryChasing says, to draw attention to someone throwing a hissy fit over some imagined reverse inequality ("yeah, there are less women MPs and CEOs, but let me tell you about sexism, my local pool has a women only swim session which I'm not allowed to attend..." "But isn't that 4.30 on a Monday afternoon when you're in work anyway?" "Yeah but no but yeah, it's the principle of the thing, innit?" "Oh god, cry me a river...") or in as a self deprecating form of humour ("Well of course, we feminazis like to bathe in male tears... keeps our leg hair nice and supple...")

I have never seen it used about serious issues, like men's mental health, or PTSD among (mostly male) combat veterans.

And you know this fine, Meph, you spend enough time hanging around the feminism boards being deliberately contrarian to know this. I think you're goading (as usual). Incidentally, I can tell you the last thing I did in RL for men's mental health (gig for health for heroes): what's the last thing you did, Meph?

No, you've definitely misunderstood the point @CherryChasingDotMuncher is making. This response is not used in response to genuine, emotional, respectful comments made by men in the course of a sensible debate. It is used in response to absurd posts usually made by anti-feminists/anti-women types.

No, @AssassinatedBeauty, CherryChasingDotMuncher is just using the same excuse that sexists use when they call women 'shrill' when they're addressing issues that sexists regard as irrelevant to their interests.

Really? an advanced search cant find any mention of it for several years, until this thread.

As others have said, male tears is a satirical term. It doesn't refer to men actually crying! It refers to men's temper tantrums when they encounter any kind of "no" from women.

I think there was someone hawking 'Male Tears' branded mugs on this very message board not that long ago.

Micaela64
What websites do you see those terms used on?
How do you tackle the issue when you see them used on those websites?

They are not common terms used on this forum.

No, @MephistophelesApprentice, you're wrong about that. @CherryChasingDotMuncher has explained it clearly.

I've never heard 'male tears' before today.