anyone else been ditched by friends for having Gender critical views?

Just wondering... how old all you folk are who are having all these arguments with your family & friends?

Oh yes, and its a short (and erroneous imo) path from different to better/worse or rational/emotional or science/arts or Venus/Mars and all that nonsense which makes it really hard to discuss.

I’m not a scientist (beyond A Level and some undergrad stuff), Barbarian, but I’m inclined to agree. It seems unlikely that the different hardware wouldn’t be running at least slightly different software. I’m comfortable with that in theory, though naturally concerned about the potential abuse of science to support dubious ideologies.

Want to add that my DH who is v GC has had to leave behind practically all of his previous left wing alliances on Facebook etc. and also in real life, because the trans thing is so prioritized and so much at the front of all the virtue signaling that takes place in those circles. He just can’t bear it. It’s so sad because his whole social circle is collapsing.

Too many people who consider themselves leftist progressives have ditched shared economic wealth as a priority for a series of virtue signaling ticks. A sort of surface of ‘look at me, aren’t I a good person” instead of actually having some integrity. I despair

I’ve had some strange conversations but not as far as I know been dumped yet, apart from a Woman I barely knew who turned her back on me and wouldn’t speak to me again after I said I thought there were sometimes good reasons to have single sex spaces for women. This was at a leftist radical type social event.

Strange conversations with friends include several who have phds which I find very worrying. Examples are ‘ well this is how all the young people think, this is the way it’s going’ and ‘so what about women who have had hysterectomies or women who are menopausal are they not women then?” And ‘but haven’t you heard about x who talks about how sometimes he feels like a woman and sometimes like a man?”

I have managed to peak one woman who was already teetering though. So that’s one more for the team.

I have had Facebook arguments with 2 in particular. One of them has been totally normal and nice in person but the other has been cold and weird with me when I've seen her.
Frankly I couldn't give a fuck now. When I first started posting publicly I was very worried but now - meh. I've found lots of allies through public posting who have spoken to me directly so losing a couple of friends isn't the end of the world.

Oh I upset everybody. Those idiots who think humans can change sex by changing what they wear and radfem friends by supporting the idea that there are likely to be innate differences bw male and female brains. Its a hard life, being a biologist.

I got denounced on social media by a longtime friend over Stefonknee The Pervert (and I hadn't even called him Stefonknee The Pervert by then!). She set her TRA friends on me and I got a very tedious bunch of "TRANS WOMEN ARE WOMEN!!!!" and other TRA messages from total strangers. I was seriously pissed off and told her never to contact me again. It really quite upset me, and in a way still does. I don't even think she's a bad person, just a rather weak one, but the idea she could set the attack dogs on me and then pretend it wasn't a big deal wasn't something I could put up with.

I have an old friend on Facebook who is very pro trans and would freak out if she knew I was gender critical. She's a midwife. An actual midwife, supposed champion and advocate of women. It's depressing.

albadross your comment reflects my position yet seems to be lost on some people though it seems like the obvious. Its a point I just cannot get my head round. Thinking oneself a woman does not make up for actual experience of growing up female, living your developmental years as female and all the fun that goes with that. I mean, would some one give me the male equivalent of having your first period? I have tried and cannot find anything that comes close.

No but I am not on facebook and generally don't raise this issue with anyone.

I cannot talk to my teenage daughters about it though. They are both very feminist as am I and we generally have good discussions but on this topic they think I am utterly bigoted and wrong. So I don't talk about it with them. A further headache here in the US is that the bathroom issue has been led by the religious right and no one wants to be part of that club.

The only person I've spoken openly with about this issue is my dsis, and she 100% agrees with me.

I managed to piss off my gay cousin by commenting on a post on FB, which he must have seen as he now avoids me like the plague.
Chopping the dangly bits off and putting on a dress and make up does not make a man woman just because he says so.

LolaFlores that’s a rare occurrence for me!

Albadross "I am not in the business of bigotry but reality isn't going to just go away"
Hit the nail on the head for me there

I recently went all out on Facebook and was surprised with the number of friends who started out responding negatively but ended up looking further into it and then came back and actually thanked me for prompting the discussion. I have autism so I don’t generally know where the line is anyway and I’ve never ‘felt female’ either so I feel like my view is just as valid as anyone else’s and the only reason I would ever hold back is if I thought I would hurt someone I care about. Hence the thread I posted about how I could talk to a newly out trans acquaintance who’d said he wanted to ‘learn more’. I’m not in the business of bigotry but reality isn’t going to just go away.

Yep

I've been blocked by my own sibling who reckons they are trans (er no mate you're autistic and bi and get a bit of a thrill from wearing high heels, all of which is fine and you should crack the fuck on and have fun but doesn't make you a biological woman).

Also one friend and their group have completely cut me out over gender politics.

I notice certain friends posting things that make me strongly suspect they are also gender critical but don't dare press the issue or come out and ask! WTF has it come to that women are tiptoeing around shit like this?

DP is a lot less bothered than me by what people think (also helps that his job wouldn't be affected by accusations of TERFery which mine undoubtedly would). He cheerfully argues the toss with people about it and gets incredibly annoyed by the way words no longer seem to have any actual meaning.

You see? I don't even know whether there are transmen, transwomen, FTM or otherwise. I get so utterly bogged down and it makes me look ignorant which is another reason why I avoid the topic.
My sister is gay and I think she agrees with me but I am too shy to broach the subject though I think it would be so enlightening for me.
How do you start that particular conversation?

For some time the questions regarding trans men has been bobbing round in my head and I shared it with a very good friend. However, we came to a bit of an impasse over the subject of toilets and changing areas. We didn't fall out as such but I think she thought I was accusing ALL trans people as violent perverts and no one was safe around them, that I was expressing some sort of Far Right anti everything that isn't me opinion.
She gave me a hard stare and I left it at that but I did feel as though I had launched myself into an area where I am at risk of being perceived as a bigoted old cow with no compassion for the lives of those people who suffer discrimination.
I tried to explain, perhaps clumsily, that one persons freedom might well mean another persons loss. We went no further with it and I have told myself that this is a subject I would discuss in places like MN where it is safe to question, discuss, consider and be able to source reading material I wouldn't necessarily come across elsewhere.
My husband and I had a bit of rumination on the subject of transwomen in female sports and sort of agreed that there has to be a logical limit to where transwomen can be part of natal women's lives...
You see, I don't really know how to clearly express the opinions that are so burdened.

Lost one friend over it. He had a huge flounce beforehand, which really was a sight to behold.

I am on another forum and have 'friends' on there as its a quite close knit community. I have 'lost friends' on there, a fair few of them. Have also been accused of being 'anti-men' for discussing male violence and trans issues. Apparently I am the reverse of a MRA. I don;t know whether to take that as an insult or a compliment tbh

Spoke to women friends i play sport with and the idea for them of males being able to compete in female sports is outrageous. My husband gets it but is a bit fed up with the subject. My teenage son is critical of the identity trenders, thinks they are ridiculous - but I’ve had arguments with him in regards to women’s rights and sexism. God knows what he’s reading online.

I’ve never discussed it with anyone. I’m not sure I’m skilled enough to put my point across.

I've distanced myself from a friend because of her nasty anti - "terf" rhetoric. I half-heartedly attempted to challenge a couple of things on social media then chickened out (she's friends with Jess Bradley and a few other high profile tras) and have just unfriended instead. I rarely see her in real life these days so not sure if she's noticed yet though.