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Feminism: Sex and gender discussions

Child marriage in the USA

114 replies

PricklyBall · 24/10/2017 20:18

BBC piece

I've posted about this before on Mumsnet (outside of FWR I get greeted with cries of "no, that isn't true" - though the Washington Post, New York Times, Independent over here have carried articles on it in recent years). Just thought I'd start another thread, by way of a bit of consciousness raising (and also possibly raise the idea that the UK ought to be pressing for an end to marriage before the age of 18 too).

OP posts:
TitaniasCloset · 25/10/2017 02:14

This has nothing to do with a nanny state. It's just essential for child protection. Whatever country or culture.

TitaniasCloset · 25/10/2017 02:13

I don't agree Lakes. Those girls are not going to speak up. There is no one to speak up for them. That's why we have these laws. In Islam forced marriage is also illegal, but the silence of the virgin means her consent whereas the previous married women is expected to speak up. But this is in the rules of Islam and most young women and girl children will be ignorant of this and it's all done under culture. So we have 12 year olds with tears that make them incontinent after giving birth. They are packed off to their families in shame and a new bride is found. This is what feminism is for. Preventing this bullshit and speaking out against it and changing the laws.

OldWitch00 · 25/10/2017 01:53

It’s so hard to believe in this day and age, you would think the woman’s movement would be right on this along with marrying cousins....

Lakesandtrees · 25/10/2017 01:47

Forced marriage is not legal. A lot of the problems are due to forced marriages. These laws need to be enforced, which would help these unfortunate girls being forced into marriage. The clerk should be calling the cops on some grown man attempting to marry a 13 year old child. You can bet that kid doesnt want to marry.

However distasteful I find early marriage, I dont agree with legislating it. The USA is a very different country to the UK. We do not appreciate the imposition of a nanny state, and there are certain states where personal freedom is held inviolable. Eroding the freedom of individual states makes me nervous.

LassWiTheDelicateAir · 25/10/2017 01:12

Thanks. I hadn't appreciated that although I suppose I should have given Scotland and the rest of UK have different rules (16 with no need for parental consent in Scotland, 16 with consent in rUK).

The difference between the States is surprising (to me anyway) it doesn't seem to follow seaboard / north/ south lines which I would have expected.

SenecaFalls · 25/10/2017 00:32

There have been threads about this before. The Obama administration pontificated about how terrible this is when it happens somewhere which isn't the USA but did nothing about it.

In fairness, there's not much that the federal government can do to change it. Marriage is primarily a matter of state law.

LassWiTheDelicateAir · 24/10/2017 23:47

So many states where there is no minimum age too

It is quite random how it differs from state to state. For example Alabama and Georgia are 16 yet California and Maine none. Apologies to Alabama and Georgia - if I'd been asked I'd have guessed the other way round.

TitaniasCloset · 24/10/2017 23:00

I know. I think with some muslim families they get a girl from the village back home sent over. But it happens with these mad Christian fundamentalists too. I feel so sorry for these girls. I even tried to explain to him the risks of a young girl getting pregnant but he wouldn't have it.

Neverknowing · 24/10/2017 22:52

Also, do these men have sex with these young girls? Why isn’t that considered pedophilia? I don’t understand how everything changes because they force them into a marriage.

Neverknowing · 24/10/2017 22:51

@TitaniasCloset it’s so maddening that they can’t even see that it’s wrong?! Women are objects to them, they get three extra years of ‘good’ woman. It makes me sick.
Who’s allowing their 13 year old to be married at that age? I suspect abuse before that so the girl thinks it’s normal, I imagine she’s trained up to be his perfect servant.

sarasabrownie · 24/10/2017 22:32

I was shocked when I saw this throw away item on the news. WTF!! I can't believe there's not more of a furore about it. The news helpfully pointed out that in most cases it was older men marrying female children.

TitaniasCloset · 24/10/2017 22:27

A Muslim guy on my twitter, I'm muslim myself, had a big debate with me about how he intends to marry a 13 year old when he marries, and that's what happened to his grandmother and mother and they are just fine and happy and tickety boo. He lives in a state in the USA where child marriage is legal and was quite smug about that. I tried to reason with him, even when he was telling me that women commit as much domestic violence as men and are just as bad. Eventually I had to block.

What the fuck is wrong with these men that they can't even wait three fucking years?

LassWiTheDelicateAir · 24/10/2017 21:43

There have been threads about this before. The Obama administration pontificated about how terrible this is when it happens somewhere which isn't the USA but did nothing about it.

Hulababy · 24/10/2017 20:23

So many states where there is no minimum age too:

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Age_of_marriage_in_the_United_States