Worried I'm missing opportunities to 'teach' my 3 DDs feminism

@conserve My point is that you're not more qualified at childminding than a professional childminder.

I don't understand why this point is confusing you so much.

OK. I don't understand why you don't understand why that's confusing me so much so let's just leave that little derailment there

I don't know if this has already been mentioned, but I have found soap operas very good at providing opportunities to discuss patriarchy (in and age appropriate way, obvs)
Also loudly deriding any cosmetic adverts. For a few years we all used to shout 'pentapeptides' and fall about laughing when any mock science came on.
It's not all serious being a feminist

You're right EmGee

I'll play no further part in the derailing. Some great wisdom here from other posters. I'm storing up some good advice.

@Namechange, I've tried to respond to every point you've raised. What ones do you think that I'm ignoring?

Why aren't you responding to the points I'm making?

This is just getting silly now and detracting from OP's initial question.
Wunderkid you're just being obtuse and provocative.

Thanks to those who have posted constructive ideas on introducing feminist role models to our DDs (and DSs!) Some great ideas here.

@conserve Yes, I obviously think a nursery setting with qualified childcare workers has people who are more qualified to look after children than you are, simply because you are a mother. I don't understand why this point is confusing you so much.

MrsJayy - yes, it is more tricky if you dislike your job. It just seems a coincidence that when a couple decides that one person should stay at home, so many decide it should be the woman.

Yes, I think a woman staying at home to run a house isn't modelling feminism

We know you think that. You haven't (again) responded to the many other points and questions raised by your view of 'feminism.'

The idea that paid employment is the only thing of economic or social value, that in order to achieve equality women have to participate in society in exactly the same way as men is not progressive, it's restrictive and shows a pretty primitive understanding of feminism. Educate yourself

Puts it all rather well, I think.

I didn't have a career i had a job my dh earned much more than i ever could i worked in childcare does a woman who has no career prospects also fail at feminisim? And a non role model for her daughters?

Honestly? You really think a 19 year old with an NVQ level 2 in childcare is better at looking after your kids than you are? Really?

Huh.

@conserve Yes, I have children. Why on earth would you assume that I don't? Of course I think professional chilcare workers/teachers are more qualified to look after children than a parent. It would be weird if they weren't.

When your child is ill, do you get offended at the idea that a medical professional is more qualified than you to look after your child even though you the child's mother? Gasp!

I think it's quite a tough one OP, because the central plank of feminism is the belief that women are oppressed and that we need to fight that oppression.

That's quite a tough message to deliver. But necessary.

@NameChange Yes, I think a woman staying at home to run a house isn't modelling feminism.

Of course I think it's feminist (and important) to challenge traditional gender roles and - when one person's career has to take precedence - that it's the woman's. I think it would be addressing an imbalance to have more SAHDs, and therefore inherently feminist.

When we went to Paw Patrol Live (I know, I know!) Marshall was female. Skye also got a whole section / song to herself (Chase was the only other pup who did.)

Pisses me off that they have a female mayor but, of course, she's incompetent.

God, once the lightbulb goes you can't miss it, can you? It's everywhere.

Thank God for Farmer Umi - at least she kicks ass (occasionally)

Wunderkind, it's attitudes like yours that perpetuate the whitewashing of women's role in society that has been going on for hundreds of years. Work that has traditionally been done by women - child rearing, other caring and domestic work - has no worth, in your worldview (even though you presumably don't feel that toddlers should be left to fend for themselves for eight hours a day?) The idea that paid employment is the only thing of economic or social value, that in order to achieve equality women have to participate in society in exactly the same way as men is not progressive, it's restrictive and shows a pretty primitive understanding of feminism. Educate yourself.

Fucking Paw Patrol

But dd pointed that one out to me herself 'mummy, there are eight characters and only one girl. That's silly isn't it?' Then she said 'but Skye has got a helicopter' and I told her we shouldn't be grateful for scraps from the patriarchal table and we had a nice chat about that

What a lot of patronising put downs Wunderkind77
Feminism to me starts with supporting women, not trying to find opportunities to put them down and belittle them.
Some great suggestions on this thread.

There are some good books to gently introduce feminist role models such as Fantastic Women Who Changed The World which my 6 year old loves.

Celebrate women - be excited about spending time with female family members, have fun with your children, have great friends of your own and a social life and interests outside the home. Model a loving and mutually supportive relationship. Gently introduce the idea that "equal" doesn't mean "the same" - you have equal Christmas presents, but you each get to choose your own.

Listen to them and make them feel valued. Do not let them hear you belittle others - especially women, especially not for appearance or how many partners they have had.

Reference female sportspeople and musicians. Ask rhetorical questions; "Why is Skye the only female Paw Patrol?" Buy comfortable clothes for them and you, buy a mixture of toys from Lego to cars to dolls.

Let them hear you get angry about issues - talk about real things at dinnertime - the letter you wrote to your MP or the way you shot down a builder who catcalled you, in an age appropriate way of course.

Respect their boundaries and do not make them hug or kiss people they don't want to.

When people say "All those girls? Poor you!" or similar, look baffled and say "No, lucky me."

Model happiness, kindness and a "mucking in" attitude and the rest will follow.

I am a SAHM and a feminist and I do not believe they are mutually exclusive. My worth is not determined by £££ on a payslip.

Innit though?

X-post with conserve

I'm a bit embarrassed for you and your views about women

Oh the irony.

Wunderkind, you're being awfully selective about the comments you're choosing to respond to.

Your position - SAHMothers cannot be feminists. Again, does that include feminist activists who are raising their children and not working? Do lifelong feminists cease to be feminists if they don't work while raising their children, according to you?

So in your brand of feminism women are not allowed to stay at home with kids but men are? And that's feminist?

Feminists should be trying to ensure women don't feel they have to be superwoman and should be supporting other women not damning their choices

Good points, wouldn't you agree?

a professional childcare worker is more qualified than you when it comes to childcare

Do you have children? I can't imagine how a parent could write that?

I'm a bit embarrassed for you and your views about women

Jeez the irony!

If you feel like you have to justify your life choices to anyone then you aren't truly empowered. Earning a wage has nothing to do with it.

Eh?? More qualified than the parent? Only on paper. I feel perfectly qualified in my role as a SAHM without needing qualifications thank you very much.

However, if I pay a nursery to look after my children then yes I would expect them to be properly trained/qualified. Just as I do the teachers in their school.