Why are feminists so aggressive?

Elendon

Yes I also associate the word with the Troubles and sectarianism as that's how I have heard it used. But I understand that others will not use it this way. I wasn't having a go at anyone, but saying that it how I understand that word. It's all got a bit weird.

Go on littertray and tell 'em you are not spaying your kitty. I'll pick up the pieces.

Titania - I was getting confused as to who was arguing with who

Me too. I am glad I was not the only one.

Thanks Lass Actually, you are right. Staunch can mean extreme in all its forms. I really should look beyond the past and not give such a knee jerk reaction.

@Bertrand

You're right it's not unique to feminists. Just that it happened on this board and not elsewhere on MN.

Some people have always said FWR is scary.

I think feminism itself is quite scary because it's a political movement with big aims and some very challenging ideas, which threaten to upset the applecart for the majority, as most of us live our lives intertwined with men's lives, whether as partners, sons, colleagues, friends etc.

There seems to be this idea that feminism should be a kind of all-welcoming club that exists just to go 'Yay! Go you!' to anybody who says 'I'm a feminist' without ever having thought through the implications of that.

It's scary having our assumptions challenged. It's uncomfortable having to think about why we do things/don't do things that we've always just taken for granted as normal. Once we start to see things from a feminist perspective it can upset all sorts of cozy applecarts in our lives. It can create conflict with the men in our lives who we love. And we can never go back to not-seeing.

And we're basically just a bunch of mammals whose automatic reaction to fear is to lash out or run away. I don't think feminists are agressive, it just feels threatening to have your views and beliefs challenged. I don't think people are hounded off here but it can feel like that if you've 'run away' (backed out of a thread) because of this perceived threat.

Because we're pissed off that we're still dealing with the same old crap!

I got totally trolled once online for saying something a bit feminist (moderate). Something like "hope you get raped you bitch" or suchlike.

So I wouldn't say it is necessarily feminists who are aggressive.

Because we fucking rock.

Elendon I am sorry that you personally are upset by that word and my apologies if it upset you.

However your personal experience does not change its meaning to the very limited usage you were arguing for, which is clearly not the case as any Google search or a search of this forum will show. On the Catholic /Protestant issue Google shows it is used for and by both sides. Nor does it justify your claims that I was citing the Daily Mail.

It is not a word I'm likely to use , other than possibly Scottish independence threads, and given your explanation will not use it on a thread you are on.

Staunch to me means, as a person who grew up a Catholic in Northern Ireland, Orange Order. Every time I see the word 'staunch' I think of this. I was terrified growing up during the 'Troubles'.

Oh I see! I thought you might be a bit fucked off as well because of my post saying I like using the terms handmaidens etc for some women and then my post about thread going off track. But all is good it seems!

Titania but no apology needed.

I was actually trying an apology to you as I hadn't noticed you had posted Thanks Gallicos for getting this back on track! when I immediately followed you and sent it back where it had been, which made my long post look a bit sarky.

I wasn't digging at you Lass I wasn't even quite sure who started the staunch debate. Staunch just means staunch to me, dictionary definition so I just skimmed over that part of the thread and didn't read it properly, I was getting confused as to who was arguing with who!

You have been here a lot longer than me, I wouldn't be rude like that.

Dunno - I keep thinking of ROOOOUND words like paunch...

and did anyone actually find the Python sketch?

I can only think of the one about GORNE.

although I was rather confused so possibly not as staunchly as I would have done if I had understood exactly what was going on).

Am I the only one who now can't say staunch without it sounding like a word I've just made up?

Just on the 'staunch' thing ... I did get confused, but I did add that I didn't find 'staunch' to be pejorative and I did say that I thought that seashell was hard done by (although I was rather confused so possibly not as staunchly as I would have done if I had understood exactly what was going on).

I'm fine with 'robust' discussion. I can be quite argumentative, I don't mind that on either side. That's health debate.

You've been great Bertrand and there has been some very interesting discussions here, with you and others. However it's not great when some posters Google your history and then try and accuse you of being a troll or a man, just because you voice different views.

I've been busy with work so have missed a lot of the recent threads but my experience hasn't been great.

On one thread someone must have googled my username and read all my previous posts on MN and accused me of being a troll and a man. Just for having a contrary, liberal feminist viewpoint.

derxa

Why are feminists held to much higher standards than any other group on Mumsnet?

"They're not. I think you all take yourselves far too seriously."

Many of the women on here are bloody funny. Being a feminist does not preclude you from having a sense of humour, contrary to what people think. I, myself, am fricken hilarious.

The nature of the threads, however, will preclude flippancy. You can't have a piss take on the side, because both the subject of the thread and the people replying, will take the issue seriously. Given that many threads are about what women suffer at the hands of men, it's a big mistake to suddenly start taking the piss.

It's also ironic, that two thirds of this thread was taken up by someone else misinterpreting a flippant comment and calling it offensive.

But yeah, you stick to your theory the feminists are not held to a higher standard than everyone else.