OK, I'm a man now. Join me?

2yo DD has just announced she identifies as a grasshopper named Frankie

Grrrrr. Yeah, a bit of a double whammy as I'm identifying as a male canine. Cis-dog flaunts his tackle, lying on his back with his cute little legs in the air :-

I have a degree in Engineering. And I have just pissed on the toilet seat (and a bit down the side).

It's all very funny isn't it.

Kr1stina - you want to drop the tina bit mate, if you'll take my advice.

But yeah, your my idea about getting a special award is the dog's bollocks. Or is that triggering to Colin? Or to me? I don't have bollocks, after all.

Is there some footy on today?

Chris here. I am currently on the tube home hogging the armrest and taking up more than my share of legroom.

I left the toilet seat up today.
I am a God.

Oh...and my name is Randy Castro

Oooh oooh! I'm a man!

Check out these manly credentials...

• I'm better at DIY than DGH (dear gay husband)
• I earn much more money
• I make all most of the decisions, because I'm more decisive and scary focused
• I own our house outright and DGH is going to be a SAHP

So basically...I was already a man. This just confirms it. I always come out as 'male' on those FB brain tests which are very accurate and now it's confirmed!

I'm Spartaman

Evening Rick do you think we could be related Jimmy Goodman here maybe a beer or two later.

ugle.org.uk/contact-us/interested-in-becoming-a-freemason/view/form

I really do think we should all be asking the Masons on this contact form if it's ok to join if we self identify as male. Nowhere on the FAQ does it discuss this - apparently you can join a female lodge if you're a woman.

Nothing about how you identify at all.

Evening lads. Rick Goodman here. Loving my manly new man name and all the male bonding on this thread.

JOhnny - I hope you will be insisting on using a room in the men's labour suite when you give birth. And of course a private room during your post natal stay. Because it would be literal violence to expect you to share a ward with female gestating parents.

Perhaps they will give you an award from being the first man to give birth to twins in that hospital ? Obviously your achievement is far more noteworthy than anything else that has taken place there.

I know that parents of multiples often do charity collections for the SCBU etc. Maybe they could collect money to fund your award instead?

Greasy rag - ingenious!!

Once a month, all my weaker feelings that I rightfully suppress, leak out as a red tide of manliness. It's not uterine lining, it's the bloody remains of such useless stuff like ; seeing mess, hearing women, remembering things that is really not a manly job to think about (birthdays are not manly) etc.
I use a greasy rag from my garage to soak it up, then toss it near the washing machine to be cleaned for me.

You lot are bloody amachures.

I've been a man since at least my last namechange in 2016.

I am currently pregnant with twin SONS. Only 11 weeks but I am identifying them as boys. I have my first hospital appointment this week. They tried to send me to fetal maternal medicine to see some gynaecologist. Fuck that. I am going to ring up and demand to see an andrologist because I am a MAN and also I'd like to know where the fetal paternal medicine dept is?

If they don't have one I'll sue their TERMy arses for hurt feelings and distress.

I can just see my sad moustachioed face in the DM now.

I don't know assigned. I intend infiltrating online forums and groups to find them, and then I'll alert you all to their presence and we can issue violent threats. My new imaginary penis tells me this is the best way to draw attention to the plight of historically oppressed men.

Can't find NAMALT but I've found some NIMBYs if that will do instead? My transphobic neighbour seems to think it inappropriate for me to be topless in their garden, just because it's embarrassing her cis teen son.

It's not that kind of pub, love.

OMG! You are all literally so brave.

Dave 'ere. Anyone for the pub tonight?

I went to the gym today and changed in, quite correctly, the male changing room. Some vile TERM actually complained because their child caught site of my mangina, which is ridiculous. It's my space, I can walk around starkers if I want.

Anyway, got the pair barred from the gym, the bigots really need to expand their expectations of the male body.

Pretty sure I recently lost out on a job due to my having a uterus. Said uterus also causes me no end of pain and problems. If I can identify out of those then count me in. #indominusrexnotindominusbex