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Original poster

OK, I'm a man now. Join me?

510 replies

AssignedPerfectAtBirth · 04/09/2017 13:25

If I can't beat 'em...

I'm going to put my 'gender' as male now. Going to 'live a man' but I am not going to change my clothes, not that I wear skirts much anyway. I will still style my hair and wear makeup because I will not be defined.

So I'm going to tell me DH and children tonight. I'm not sure if DH will accept that he is now gay.

Any one want to out their inner man and join me on my journey?

OP posts:
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Mrsfrumble · 04/09/2017 19:44

I can't stop laughing at Justin Thebogforathirtyminuteshitatbathtime. You're a genius Turnip

Now I'm a chap called D'artagnan, my status as a SAHP means I'm progressive and an exemplary parent, rather than a lazy bludger. Result!

AdaColeman · 04/09/2017 19:43

Oh! We will all need a HOBBY.

Popchyk · 04/09/2017 19:42

Too right, Isam.

I am off out later and will be taking the B762 past the Golf Outlet place and then take a right down by the old gasworks. You can totally floor it down there, no coppers about. This will mean that I avoid the temporary lights outside the farm shop. Resurfacing apparently.

Later on I'll come back via the back road behind the Flea and Crown (used to be the Black Bull and before that The Pointing Dog when Terry was landlord) so I don't get caught by the speed cameras outside Morrisons.

If you need any more details about any of this, just let me know.

Datun · 04/09/2017 19:34

You can mansplant some of your never-to-be-shaved pubes onto your tits chest. Be creative - in a manly way.

Elendon · 04/09/2017 19:34

I've just finished writing the most misogynistic, sexist film script ever seen.

Can't wait for the Oscar!

Original poster
AssignedPerfectAtBirth · 04/09/2017 19:33

ATurnipOfMyOwn

Applause!

Justin Titled is good

Justin Capable?

OP posts:
Original poster
AssignedPerfectAtBirth · 04/09/2017 19:30

OK, he has compromised. He said that is willing to be gay if I dress up like this

twitter.com/KaeleyT/status/904755540869259264

I'm not sure if I can get the beard right in time

OP posts:
Popchyk · 04/09/2017 19:30

True heroism from you in that shop, abacuss.

Next time anybody messes with me I will accuse them of being ON THE WRONG SIDE OF HISTORY.

That will show them.

AdaColeman · 04/09/2017 19:30

Isambard here again.

Just realized that while I've always loved fast cars, now I'm a man I'll be able to hold forth in any social situation, scattering my conversation with manly terms such as transmission, dog clutch and synchromesh, whilst all around me go glassy eyed with boredom envy.

Yes, I can be a car bore!!

Theimpossiblegirl · 04/09/2017 19:25

I'm changing my name to Theimpossibleman, growing a beard (so I can glitter it) and developing a taste for artisan craft beer.

Original poster
AssignedPerfectAtBirth · 04/09/2017 19:21

OK. Things are bad

DH has just walked in on me when I was wearing his Calvin Kleins and Tool Belt and using my Rabbit through the hole. I was fantasying about having a big packet and was so horny about it

Do you think I can get him to meet me in a gay bar just to act it out? He seems to be very closeted about the prospect.

OP posts:
Elendon · 04/09/2017 19:20

Datun

You know where that fairy is kept. Big boy!

kalinkafoxtrot45 · 04/09/2017 19:20

Fabiano Eisenmann here. I am very manly. I have power tools that aren't pink and I like sci fi and Iron Maiden. I'm so glad I can be my true self.

Datun · 04/09/2017 19:17

Popchyk

Don't get me started. What with a woman being Doctor Who. Ridiculous, women can't be doctors.

abacuss · 04/09/2017 19:16

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ErrolTheDragon · 04/09/2017 19:16

Oh yeah (I'm now Rory Tennant. Am I related to David?)

Every flipping coin has a woman on it, every banknote, and now they want more!ShockAngry

ATurnipOfMyOwn · 04/09/2017 19:16

Colin - what about that hard bloke who wrote Bravo Two Zero? He'd be fucking mint on a tenner.

Popchyk · 04/09/2017 19:13

Colin here again.

I've just clapped eyes on that new tenner with Jane Austen on. mumsnet link

Disgraceful. If they had to have an author then it should have been Jeffrey Archer. We are being erased as men.

I will be boycotting all forms of cash immediately in protest, at great personal sacrifice.

Who's with me?

ATurnipOfMyOwn · 04/09/2017 19:13

Toasty - HIS money?

usernameinfinito · 04/09/2017 19:13

I am Jeremy long and possess a male vagina. I also have male periods. I would also like entry to posh men clubs. I will be scratching my male vulva often in public to prove my maleness too.

Ideserveaholiday · 04/09/2017 19:12

Haven't RTFT but don't have to as I'm a man now. The next time I see a queue for the Ladies' toilet I'm just going to smirk as I sail right past to the Gents.

Elendon · 04/09/2017 19:11

I love vaginas. I am a true man. And a feminist ally as well.

What? What is this nonsense you say? VULVA? That sounds disgusting.

Women have a separate organ for peeing out of? Special snowflakes!!!

ATurnipOfMyOwn · 04/09/2017 19:11

Ooh yeah - that definitely 'needs a soak'.

MrsMoastyToasty · 04/09/2017 19:10

I have suspected that my now gay husband has been in touch with his feminine side for some time and has been cross dressing. He claims however that as a scot it is his cultural right to wear a kilt and carry his money in a sporran.

Datun · 04/09/2017 19:09

I've just done the washing up, the manly way. I'm loving it. I shall give that dish a day because it will then disappear and end up in the cupboard.

It's a piece of piss, this.

OK, I'm a man now. Join me?
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