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Original poster

UK gym to admit self ID'ing men into womens changing rooms

113 replies

Whatnextxx · 07/08/2017 22:22

Here is the thing, went to renew my membership at the gym today but before I signed up asked about the policy of allowing self ID'ing men (i.e. men who decide to become "women" without surgery etc) access to womens changing rooms. The membership assistant didn't know and went to find out, she was gone quite a long time and came back ashen faced to tell me that if a man "presents" as a woman he would be allowed to use the womens changing room. I pointed to a little girl of about 5 or 6 and asked how she would explain a naked male in the changing room to her and did the same with an older women who looked to be around 70. She said she is shocked at the policy and wondered where the protection is for women and girls, she didn't have a clue about Justine Greenings proposals.

The thing is that the womens changing room has only 4 cubicles and they are at the far ends of the main open space so even if I or any woman was to use the cubicles we might emerge into an open space where naked men might be.

The assistant said she had spoken with the manager and asked what would happen if a sex offender pretended to be a woman. She told me that she didn't agree with the policy but that there was nothing she could do as the policy came from central office. What an awful position to put employees in.

She understood exactly why I didn't renew my membership.

I contacted the owner of the gym and to try to highlight the issue did it on Twitter. I was subjected to a barrage of horrible comments, one even accused me of being a jihadist!

So fed up with this, there seems to be nowhere for women to go without worrying that some male bodied person is going to come into spaces where women are changing.

Am I being unduly sensitive or am I realistically concerned about having my privacy and dignity taken away by men who think or want to behave "like a woman"?

OP posts:
busyboysmum · 08/08/2017 08:46

Ralph I have 3 sons and don't get any of those things from the op. Your post makes no sense.

theporcinegrappler · 08/08/2017 08:37

*blokes don't want women in the men's changing rooms

theporcinegrappler · 08/08/2017 08:36

Women don't want blokes in the women's changing rooms
bloke women in the men's changing rooms what's so hard to understand about that

RaininSummer · 08/08/2017 08:35

Most violence against women is by male bodied people. This does not mean that people think all men are potential rapists.

theporcinegrappler · 08/08/2017 08:35

What the fucking fuck are you talking about Ralph??

Euripidesralph · 08/08/2017 08:33

Without debating the full trans issue my concern here is the tone you snidely refer to as male bodied people

Please can we delineate that although you tried to cover yourself by saying the assistant mentioned sex offenders (I doubt that heavily)...your tone implies a reference to male bodied people being something to fear .... reference to it being quiet at certain times

I know you'll disengenuously claim nothing is said in the post but your tone is horrible and you're hiding behind technicalities

Here's my issue. .....I have two sons...why is it ok for you to insinuate that being male is something to be feared or be intimidated? Why do you believe being female gives you the right to judge and put other groups and genders down ? You feel uncomfortable? Great lovely......please consider it ok to implicate demonising of my son's gender because you have issues you can't deal with like a grown up?

I'm extremely feminist bordered with meritocracy....I wholeheartedly believe in safe places for all genders

What you have posted shows far more about your own issues and needing a scapegoat because you're not enlightened enough or adult enough to face them head on

I take offence because one day my boys , the ones that I bring up to respect all genders , to be aware that there is no definition of what creates respect other than giving respect .......one day those boys will come up against someone like you

Who will decide they are lesser or dangerous because of their gender

Just like once upon a time people did to women

But hey......as long as you made a tokenistic statement during your terribly middle class gym renewal

ridiculoussingle · 08/08/2017 08:30

Maybe we need to try to organise a day of action, in which en masse people self identify as the opposite sex. I'll happily go into male changing rooms, and tbh I frequently use mens toilets if the women's has too much if a queue.

RaininSummer · 08/08/2017 08:27

It is time to wake up ladies. Find out about this before it takes hold. Read about the gender identification bill which goes to consultation this autumn and would make this legal. Make your views known to your MPs. We need to think about what the implications are for us, our mothers, daughters and granddaughters.

bambambini · 08/08/2017 08:22

Slightly unrelated I know, but I was thinking of how we can challenge all this self identifying. I wonder what the gym would do if I self identified as a man and went swimming in trunks only. Somehow I don't think they'd be very accepting of me swimming top less, but I don't have the courage to find out.

I think you hat would be an excellent way of making a statement- if some women had the balls to do it. You might find some men will do it too - like Joey Salad did with womens loos. Saw an interview with a man who did just this (think dutch maybe). Just self idntified to see what would happen.

theporcinegrappler · 08/08/2017 08:17

Twenty something guys wouldn't want to offend me by complaining when grandma starts checking out their package would they

theporcinegrappler · 08/08/2017 08:14

Good point I think I might self-identify as a man go to the men's changing rooms at the gym and perve at all the gorgeous young men with their Adonis like bodies
I'm sure no one will mind

ridiculoussingle · 08/08/2017 08:13

Maybe that's what we need to do as a backlash? Invade male spaces? Bet there'd be complaints if women identifying as men suddenly started going into the male changing rooms. Especially if we did it en masse.

ridiculoussingle · 08/08/2017 08:07

Slightly unrelated I know, but I was thinking of how we can challenge all this self identifying. I wonder what the gym would do if I self identified as a man and went swimming in trunks only. Somehow I don't think they'd be very accepting of me swimming top less, but I don't have the courage to find out.

larrygrylls · 08/08/2017 07:56

It is a minefield for gyms. Whatever they do will be questioned.

What policy would most people want for transsexuals?

Still think it is cutting off your nose to spite your face to cut your membership based on a purely hypothetical situation. I am sure no set of rules would not allow hypothetical situations (however far fetched) unacceptable to many members.

bambambini · 08/08/2017 07:49

I love my large sports club. The changing rooms are large, mostly communal with only 2 cubicles. The women are all generally relaxed and open with nudity. I can't imagine an obviously male TW in there - i doubt it would go down well. Would be interesting to see what would actually happen though.

As for the OP's dilema - i'd be renewing my membership and would deal with the issue if it happens. I might discuss it and ask the gyms policy but it wouldn't put me off - yet.

Brieandpateplease · 08/08/2017 03:44

I wouldn't be happy with a man in the women's changing room either.
What gym company is it?

Original poster
Whatnextxx · 08/08/2017 02:15

Brieandpateplease - why would I go to the trouble to "make this scenario up"? That is exactly the response I got from MRA's on Twitter, alongwith being called a whole host of unpleasant names. If you chose to believe I am lying that is your issue not mine. With regard to renewal of membership, there are several levels of membership and I have in the past reviewed these before renewing. I personally prefer to discuss long term financial commitments before signing on the dotted line.

OP posts:
HelenaDove · 08/08/2017 01:31

DJ Some of those men might change their minds and start whining when their wives/girlfriends start putting on weight or looking less "toned"

Im guessing THEN people will listen. Sad and outrageous but true.

Hidingtonothing · 08/08/2017 01:08

That's exactly the sort of issue I wanted to know about Seven thank you, I'll put my hands up that I have no idea what issues it might create, that's why I asked. I'm starting to realise this is about much more than facilities anyway, these threads are eye opening for me Blush

Brieandpateplease · 08/08/2017 00:58

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Hidingtonothing · 08/08/2017 00:58

I've been embarrassingly uninterested in any form of activism up til now but I would join DJ. The prospect of self ID going through worries me massively, the implications are huge and too many people don't seem to be able to see it. I really want to do something before it's too late because there will be no going back if this bill goes through.

AndNowItIsSeven · 08/08/2017 00:47

Hiding I am a wheelchair user my local swimming pool has only one disabled cubicle. I am obviously happy to wait if another disabled customer is using it, but why should I wait while a non disabled man uses it?

DJBaggySmalls · 08/08/2017 00:40

Seeingadistance I've seen a lot of men openly saying that on social media.

I'm starting to think we need a radical feminist womens organisation, with paid membership.

Seeingadistance · 08/08/2017 00:25

I think they'll only be happy when all the women are confined to their own homes. Back to "good old days" when our only sphere was the domestic one. Silenced and unseen.

AssignedMentalAtBirth · 08/08/2017 00:15

As afar as I know, there are family facilities which also cater for disabled access to the swimming pool in my gym. No idea how private or not.

Regardless, the aggressive TRAs want validation by being allowed into the female space; that's what it's all about. So no, not likely to make them happy.

They will only be happy when all the women are changing in the toilets.

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