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Original poster

Can you lot explain this to me in words of one syllable

36 replies

Whattheacktual · 11/07/2017 08:33

Facebook twatrery.

So I've been called

A TRA

A TERF

Transphobic

Homophobic

And

Dangerous

For saying that I as a heterosexual cis woman am sexually attracted to men.

Shock that seems to cover a lot of bases.

Anyone care to explain?

Or have they all been on the koolaid?

OP posts:
sticklebrix · 11/07/2017 09:27

I then pointed out that asking others to use preferred pronouns and yet consistently calling someone else by a moniker they find offensive was rather hypocritical.

I see this all over the place and also find it deeply inconsistent. There doesn't seem to be an explanation beyond 'cisgender is not an offensive term'. Even when people say that they find it offensive.

OTOH I think it's unreasonable to go through life expecting not to be offended. So they can call me cisgender if they like. But not expect me to stay silent about why I think it's a nonsense descriptor.

Original poster
Whattheacktual · 11/07/2017 09:27

What they were saying was that it wasn't about the personal it was "in general" and I said that sexual attraction is always personal.

I may be attracted to heterosexual men but that doesn't mean I am attracted to ALL heterosexual men there has to be the frisson. And neither would a gay man be attracted to me.

It was awful the abuse and I don't understand it at all. I seemed to be hung up either way and both ways. I couldn't do anything right.

OP posts:
Cocklodger · 11/07/2017 09:20

Apparently refusing to sleep with a man who has a vagina/woman with a penis is homophobic/transphobic etc etc. a lesbian lady was lambasted for refusing to sleep with a man who for all intents and purposes looked like a man, talked like a man, dressed like a stereotypical man and had a cock. She was lambasted as he "identified as female" so she should've slept with him not doing so was transphobic Hmm there was an article or thread somewhere about this I'll try to find it - might be along those lines though.
It wouldn't surprise me if you're called transphobic or homophobic based on that.

Original poster
Whattheacktual · 11/07/2017 09:15

Yes nolove

I just don't understand the whole reasoning behind the insults.

How is saying I personally am heterosexual homophobic or transphobic?

OP posts:
Original poster
Whattheacktual · 11/07/2017 09:13

I said that not quite in those terms cock. I wouldn't call them a man in a frock because that's offensive and sinking to their level. But yes. That level of hypocrisy.

OP posts:
NoLoveofMine · 11/07/2017 09:12

That they feel they have the right to label you as such and decide you identify with the gender deemed appropriate for your sex says it all - not identifying others as women if they define as such is "actual violence" though. So regressive and entrenching outdated notions of gender we should be fighting against; it's very concerning.

Cocklodger · 11/07/2017 09:08

How fucking dare they try to label you something you don't identify with.
id be telling them from now on they're nothing more than cocks in frocks and watching them fume tbh.
If it's ok for them to label you something you aren't why isn't it ok for us to tell them that a man in a dress is a... man in a dress?

Original poster
Whattheacktual · 11/07/2017 09:01

I said that I found cis offensive and was told that it wasn't offensive I had no right to say it was and that the person concerned had every right to call me it.

I then pointed out that asking others to use preferred pronouns and yet consistently calling someone else by a moniker they find offensive was rather hypocritical.

That didn't go well.

OP posts:
NoLoveofMine · 11/07/2017 08:55

Words of one syllable fail me.

I can only offer this Hmm in addition to your Shock

Yet another reason discussing these things on much of social media is beyond trying. I refuse to use "cis" though.

Original poster
Whattheacktual · 11/07/2017 08:44

Facebook group. I've left. You'll be surprised to know.

I don't get how I can be a TERF and a TRA at the same time. Nor do I understand how it is dangerous to young people confused about their sexuality for me personally to have an attraction to men.

OP posts:
sticklebrix · 11/07/2017 08:38

A TRA and a TERF?

I have no explanation. But it shows how confused the thinking on this topic has become (from those calling you names, not you).

Sounds horrible. Are these people your actual friends?!