All gender toilets

user - what do you disagree with?

I totally disagree with that!!

And now 13 year old boys have access to smart phones with cameras and internet and are far more likely to have been exposed to porn.

I was wrong and disgusting for suggesting that boys would sexually harass girls/ try to film them under toilet doors etc.

Do these people not remember 13 year old boys?

I had a row on an ADHD "support group" on FB yesterday. A woman had posted that she'd taken her 10 yo DS into the Ladies with her and got a lot of evil looks. Loads of people posted to say how dare they, and that they would continue to take their 8/9/10 yo boys to the Ladies to keep them safe.

We were away at the weekend and spent a lot of time queuing for toilets in various places. My DD is 10 and also has ADHD. She has sensory issues that mean she doesn't get the urge to go until she's really desperate.

We joined a queue in a motorway services that came out of the door and round the corner. She looked really worried and I was concerned she couldn't hold on. If she was smaller I could have got away with barging her to the front with apologies but that doesn't go down well at 10. There was a queue for the 2 disabled toilets consisting of people with walking sticks and mothers holding babies, so no option there.

In the queue in front of us were a number of women with large boys. When I say large, they were taller than my DD, who at 140cm is average for her age.

I pointed out on FB that by taking their DSs to the Ladies they were causing issues for other people's DDs. Apparently it wasn't safe for their 10 yos to use the mens. I pointed out that I also had DSs, who used the mens perfectly well and was accused of thinking I was the perfect parent . I gave up and left the group. They had absolutely no clue.

Quite aside from my DD there are so many female issues that cause urgency. Pregnancy, menopause, prolapse - there could have been a large proportion of women in that queue having issues with waiting. When it's busy I always take DD into my cubicle but I noticed that all these boys who were incapable of going to the mens by themselves each had a separate cubicle.None of them went in with mum.

For goodness sakes. So teenage boys are now so enlightened that they won't act silly around the girls in school, just all of a sudden everyone including perverts are going to start behaving well in these situations?

Bela just wait until it affects them or their child, you will be able to say told you so, not that that will be much comfort.

Everyone is bending over backwards to appear right on and women and girls are being thrown under the bus.

When I post about this on fb noone responds.

I was called an ignorant bigot yesterday on a forum I've been a member of for years, all for saying that schools need seperate male and female toilets and changing rooms. I also pointed out the danger of letting self identified MtF people into female spaces, I was given a lecture on my incorrect facts goadingly called CIS and then regaled with the story of how this particular trans person had been welcomed with open arms onto a female basketball team.
Everone else on the thread ( about gender neutral loos in schools) said I was wrong and disgusting for suggesting that boys would sexually harass girls/ try to film them under toilet doors etc.
I also got the 'born in the wrong body' narrative and how hateful I was for not being sympathetic and understanding

People can't see or don't believe what is going on .

I've changed laddered tights, tops with stains on, adjusted bra straps in front of the sinks (usually where the cubicles are too small to manouevre or there is a queue for the loos). Can't really do any of that in front of men, particularly colleagues that I would then need to go and sit next to in the office

Mind you even putting make up on could get creepy.

Yep. I have had to change clothes in the Loos many times. There will literally be no clean private spaces to take care of these things anymore. So if you bleed all over your skirt or have to change on a hot day you will have to seek out a disabled loo.

In my works loos today a muslim colleague was using the mirror to re-do her head scarf. She took it right off to do this. I doubt she'd want to do this with a bloke in there with her.

Indeed. And it is not only that. A woman might use this female-only space for all kinds of readjusting clothes.

I once saw a woman take off her t-shirt and hold it under the tap to get it wet before putting it back on. (It was a very hot day.)

Those are all things you can't do if males are allowed in there.

This limits women's freedom, but not men's. Men are not expected to hide their hair or chests from women, thus will be perfectly able to do all those things on the unisex loo.

I've had enough of the bullshit too. On Twitter yesterday I was reading all the comments supporting Northern Irish Women's Aid, who "support all women, including transwomen" And so welcome transwomen into their refuges. It is as though the 70s never happened. A women who is in danger of being killed, who may have traumatised children with her, and has had to flee her home, will have to be in a space with people with penises, who are sexually attracted to women, and clueless/careless enough about actual women's safety that they are taking up space in a refuge. NI women's aid had been responding to an incorrect rumour that they were getting a new head who was a transwoman, and they were waffling on about intersectionality. Well, I personally care far more about my daughters' safety, and my own, than I will ever care about some man's feelings. Having wounded feelings is nothing like actual wounding. And as a victim of male assault, I know the bloody difference!

I have had enough of this. And yes to the posts about Muslim women who need to adjust their hijab or wash for prayers or fill up a water bottle for the loo.

And not having sani bins in the Loos? What planet are these people on?

I want to actually do something about this now, posting on here though I'm glad I can, isn't cutting it anymore. I have had enough of this bullshit.

Toilets are about sex. Nothing to do with gender. I'd get rid of the sign of female in a dress across the board that confuses people.

If a male is that uncomfortable using a male toilet use the disabled/family/baby changing toilet.

I'm erring on the side of piss poor goad.

I'm going to start writing these things down.

It's their only post (at least with that username) so I'm erring on the side of piss poor goad.

Or it could have been meant sarcastically. And 'i completely agree' means iasppark completely agrees with other posters' take on the subject.

Even the goading has gone down hill assassinated

I despair i really do...

We used to get a much better class of goady

I imagine there should be a full stop after "men", as well as some other punctuation!

"Just saying... there's only 1 gender - men. Women are just objects - why would we need a toilet for an object?? I completely agree [with turning the women's into gender neutral]"

I think that's what was meant. So a poorly written goad, rather than a sensible point. But I could be wrong.

iasppark I am not following that at all, could you explain what you mean please?

just saying there's only 1 gender, men women are just objects why would we need a toilet for an object?? i completely agree

Gaps were to check that no-one had collapsed in the loo, or would be locked in when loos were locked at night. They make sense, but make it easier for a man to film women.

Datun - y, and to stop people going in in groups and using them for sex or drug taking / dealing.

I imagine the gaps at the top and especially bottom of the partitions also help to make cleaning easier as it means there are fewer corners to trap dirt.

I suppose the original idea for introducing toilets with gaps at the top and bottom was for safety. If someone had fainted for instance, or was being held in there, maybe?

I prefer a completely enclosed cubicle, but if I was drawing up plans for an office, or school, I would have to take other things into account.

Yet more reasons for sex segregated facilities.