It's always about the toys...

81 replies

Barcoo2 · 11/05/2017 01:54

Every single article I've read about a child being transed, whether it's in the Daily Mail or a more reputable source, or a mummy blog or whatever, has mentioned that they preferred 'girly' toys or rejected 'girly' toys. Girly toys are always dolls and princesses. Boyish toys are not mentioned as distinctly. Usually girls who want to be boys are framed in terms of their rejection of the girly toys.

So is it all about the toys? My three year old has made enough throw away comments ('I want to be a boy knight', sticking a macaroni in her labia and boasting about a willy) and has had enough interests in pirates, dinosaurs etc for me to trans her if I was so inclined.

Does anyone have any articles or links that don't mention toys AT ALL? I'd really appreciate it if you had any...I'm just finding the whole thing so clear cut in that EVERY CASE I've read is about a rejection of social constructions of gender, guided by the parents, rather than an innate femininity that represents what real females feel or whatever.

OP posts:

Original poster

Barcoo2 · 11/05/2017 11:16

Sorry, to add

...after all, the housework thing is actually a gender stereotype, whereas all these articles have the disclaimer 'toys don't maketh the gender however little Johnny just loved sparkly spangles...'

OP posts:

Original poster

Barcoo2 · 11/05/2017 11:15

I saw Miranda's post, Datun and it was interesting. However we keep seeing anecdotal evidence, anecdotal posts, etc. I wanted to know if there was a single incident where a child had 'sex dysphoria' rather than craving the idealised gender stereotypes.

Jaxing Jump I can understand a child 'violently' rejecting their gender, but I'm finding rejecting their sex a little harder to understand. Perhaps I fall into that bracket you mention, the majority of readers whose intelligence falls short. Or perhaps it's illogical.

If these children observe the opposite sex, and violently crave their gender stereotypes, why is it not the actual things I experienced growing up, such as wishing to be assigned more housework.

OP posts:

Datun · 11/05/2017 08:51

OP, Miranda Yardley (a gender critical transwoman) has touched on this in the link below.

mirandayardley.com/en/common-threads-and-narratives-of-transgender-children-and-what-this-means-for-our-lesbian-and-gay-populations/

ChocChocPorridge · 11/05/2017 08:38

From my own experience, kids still don't experience any gender at all (mine are 3 and 6, but also their cousins and school mates) - they know (age appropriately) where babies come from, and the basic physical differences between bodies, but otherwise, have no expectations.

Well, that's not entirely true, they know from cartoons that girls have long hair, bows, and eyelashes - but then they know female friends with short hair and male friends with long hair, and they both have luxuriant lashes, so it hasn't really bored into their consciousness very much (plus DP and I are both pretty gender non-conforming anyway, so they'd not get much socialisation from us).

They go to an international school, so the kids they socialise with already often have very different cultural gender stereotypes anyway.

Beyond actual body dysphoria, I can't see how any child can be diagnosed unless they've been raised in a very homogenous, strongly enforced gender stereotyped environment, and are strong willed enough to fight against it.

JaxingJump · 11/05/2017 07:44

Trying to explain that your child has fundamentally and violently rejected their gender for an article is impossible. It's beyond the intelligence or experience of most readers.

Talking about colours, clothes and toys is about the only tangible thing a newspaper can focus on. It's more interesting to readers than 'he just couldn't cope with being whichever gender'.

patodp · 11/05/2017 07:40

Can't say I've seen one.
We do live in the age where a toy digger is male but a penis is not.

Unflip

1 2 3 4