Dove transgender ad #realmoms are men!

Just seen on twitter that the man in this photo is the transwoman in the Dove ad:

They would have been better off leaving out the crap about not being just a mum and having other things that define you

yeah it was like the san pro ads: "don't just have a period, have a rock climbing, DJing, road tripping, white jeans wearing period"!

It was "have it all" bollocks
It's more than enough to just do the boring business of just keeping your small infant alive!

They would have been better off leaving out the crap about not being just a mum and having other things that define you, which is just another way of telling most women they probably aren't good enough and all the crap ARE YOU BACK TO NORMAL YET? LOST THE BABY WEIGHT YET? STOPPED WHINGING ABOUT SLEEP YET? YOURS WASNT THE FIRST HUMAN BABY EVER YOU KNOW bollocks shite that people like to spout at mums who are just trying to get on top of having a family (me, sensitive much? )

They would have been better focusing on #realparents with a theme along the lines of no matter who you are or your situation, a #realparent is one who knows what bath stuff their baby uses, what time their bath is, how frequently they need moisturising, how much nappy free time they get/need etc. A #realparent does skin to skin in the bath. Etc.

Because somebody in advertising, at some point, needs to admit babies are boring and hard work. And the #realparents are the ones that actively engage with the drudgery.

And no I'm not trans, or on the band wagon. I just find the outrage and anger at grown adults decisions and the assumptions that nobody can be or should be accepting of those situations astonishing.

Society is attempting to be inclusive

You think the type of transactivism dove has hopped on board with is inclusive ????
It excludes/silences/erases/displaces lesbians, trans men (biological women who are trans) and biological women.

But hey, if you think reaching out to white western men to make sure that they are included in movements that are supposed to make minority visibility a priority, you're free to support that I guess

Terfinator

It doesn't look like it.

Just to clarify, the women in the adverts are not actors/models?

It's not that this advert was particularly offensive. It's the premise.

Men cannot be mothers. It changes the meaning of the word mother. And father, for that matter.

Indeed "translesbophobic" if such a word exists.... probably does

That's true. Or worse still, they would be in danger of looking like a heterosexual couple.

Why not say #real parents
completely agree with that. But I suspect that would not provide AGPs with the satisfaction they crave of being publicly catagorised as #realmoms. If it was #real parents (ie- an actual progressive statement) TRAs would quickly accuse Dove of being transphobic for making a sperm-producing #realmom look like a father in lipstick and a dress - which would totally erase his identity as the mum.

Apparently, its an ad for baby dove. (I didn't get that from a quick look at the ad, it could having been trying sell me car insurance for all I knew)

Why not say #real parents. Fathers have been known, on occasion, to look after children.

And statistically, there are probably more disabled lesbian adopters than there are trans-moms

I didn't actually think it was an incredibly diverse set of women. As already pointed out there was no lesbian couple, no adoptive mothers and there were no disabled mothers either. Most of them were just ordinary women with slightly unusual hobbies.

A female adopter calling herself a mother is not comparable to the male parent of a child insisting they're not only the child's mother; but are an example of what a REAL mother looks like.
Complete straw man.

"I understand that men aren't biologically mothers however would anyone make the same comment around a non-biological mother who adopted a child?"

No.

I'm not a fan of the majority of the trans nonsense but i didn't see an issue with the as?

But what are Dove playing at creating an ad that causes that kind of visceral reaction?

That places a potential female/mother as victim amongst all the 'empowering' 'real mum' trite crap.

Why don't they care about not being seen to erase boring motherhood?

Taking the trans issue out of the equation, what new mother hasn't had mothering patronisingly dictated to her (often by men), or had an older relative insist that her instincts are wrong and she's just being silly etc.

Why on earth would they produce an ad that has echos of that? It's idiotic. The whole thing stinks of male privilege. Hence the extreme reactions (I should think, obviously can't speak for anyone else).

And people who have rational opinions such as that, don't rile me up. My issue is with the comments up thread about how she "must" feel and about her being "relegated".

Hence my comment that we don't know that.

Agree with batteries

duxb

I have no idea what their setup is but i dont know how you would KNOW that she doesnt have a problem (in the same way that i dont KNOW that she does have a problem)

Transition may have started while she was pregnant, she may hate the advert but feel that she coukdnt get out of it

She may be loving every single second of it...not that that really makes a difference

Actual lol at the biological male being called a "real mom"

That's Dove never being used in this house again!

It is not about the choices made by this couple. They are free to do what they want. The issue is the notion of man as mother being rammed down our throats. i personally decline to have my intelligence insulted in this manner.

You wouldn't normally deliberately edit a couple so one of them comes across as controlling and dominant in an ad that is meant to be uplifting.

So the whole thing just gives the uncomfortable impression that either

A) the MTT is happy to be the one who talks, the one who defines motherhood, without reference to the experiences of their partner who carried and birthed the child, which is quite self-absorbed and domineering

OR,
B) Dove were only interested in the opinions of the MTT to the point of not requesting any contribution from the birth mother, which implies that Dove as a brand is consciously happy to erase 'boring' motherhood in favour of their self defined 'real' motherhood.

Both leave a nasty taste in the mouth tbh.

If both of them had talked about the experience it would have come across totally differently.

How do you know she doesn't feel that way?
I saw it and the way she sits there in silence, looking slightly awkward, while he claims to be the mum ..... I have been pregnant, got the stretchmarks, been through birth, etc - and it gave me a very strong and visceral sense of what it means to be a mum. I just cannot imagine how she puts up with that prick making that claim in front of her face like that....

Because if she did feel that way, why would she had a relatively small child with a man who had begun the process of transitioning/transitioned and then willingly been part of an advertising campaign supporting both their roles as mothers.

And no I'm not trans, or on the band wagon. I just find the outrage and anger at grown adults decisions and the assumptions that nobody can be or should be accepting of those situations astonishing.

Society is attempting to be inclusive.