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Original poster

Can you help me make sense of why this conversation annoyed me?

59 replies

Mrstumbletap · 26/02/2017 16:26

So I'm a teacher and I am lucky to teach sixth form students too, they are awesome and come back with real questions about rape, about same sex marriage, about wearing revealing clothing, equal pay etc and want to know more, they challenge me and I challenge them back and I can literally see their minds unfolding in front of me, it's fantastic.

Anyway I am currently training a teacher too and he often observes my lessons and contributes. On Friday the students were talking about job roles and the trainee teacher I will call him 'Gary' said "yeah but some roles are better for men, they are stronger, not all roles should be given to all people". He used army/infantry roles as an example. I challenged this but he stuck to his guns and said some things that involve strength are just better for men.

Then later the class were talking about the footage of a trump supporter being interviewed saying "women shouldn't rule a country they could start wars too easily" the reporter replies "but aren't all wars started by men?" Gary then chips in and says "No Helen of Troy started a war!"

I was then showing the students a link I found on social media called "women at the top" (don't know if you have seen it) and it shows images of The Houses of Parliament, the EU, White House meetings etc with loads of people and then another image with all the men removed using photoshop, showing there are only 1 or 2 women in these important meetings. The strap line is 'There is room for more women at the top'. Gary then says "I have no problem with the women being in these positions as long as they are qualified". But he isn't questioning the qualifications of the men in these positions?!

It has bugged me all weekend, am I over thinking this or is his challenging of these examples justified?

OP posts:
M0stlyBowlingHedgehog · 26/02/2017 16:50

"Gary then chips in and says "No Helen of Troy started a war!""

Gary should not be a teacher because Gary is thick. He is also a sexist pillock, but his stupidity is the main disqualification.

Batteriesallgone · 26/02/2017 16:43

He's sexist. Does he have a supervisor you could chat to about this? Also it's worth you discussing your concerns with another teacher your side (colleague or boss) because to put it bluntly, you're a woman so he may well either dismiss your concerns or try and turn it into a he/she said thing. If you've discussed it with a couple of people before raising it with him you've covered your own back.

orangefolly · 26/02/2017 16:40

Gary sounds like a bit of a sexist prick. I think it's the insinuation that women could get into those senior positions by positive descrimination instead of merit. And the Helen of Troy comment is off - she didn't start a war like politicians do - it was because of her beauty!! Massive gender stereotyping. With the strength thing, he is making a lazy, sweeping generalisation. Some women are stronger than some men. So what if the majority of stronger people are men? If a person fits the physical requirements of the role I don't see how it matters.

VestalVirgin · 26/02/2017 16:40

But he isn't questioning the qualifications of the men in these positions?!

Of course not.

We will have achieved true equality when unqualified women can be as successful as unqualified men frequently are.

We are not there, and will probably not be there for a long time - just look at Trump. A similarly unqualified woman would never have gotten anywhere.

Gary is a very stupid, sexist and disgusting man, whom I already cannot stand just after reading those few things about him.

I am glad I don't live in the UK so there is no risk this man will ever teach any children I know. But feel sad for the children he will end up teaching.

Vegansnake · 26/02/2017 16:36

He's got a down on women...like a few of us are ok in certain positions as long as there are not enough to make a difference,or that might upset the status quo...keep a close eye on him and be ready to pull him up each time he spouts crap

KarmaNoMore · 26/02/2017 16:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

OneWithTheForce · 26/02/2017 16:34

Oh wow! I'm afraid I wouldn't be able to work with him whilst he continued with these comments. does he have a supervisor? This needs addressed. He is responsible for helping to mild young minds.

SusanTrinder · 26/02/2017 16:33

It annoyed you, rightly imo, because he's sexist.

Like a pp said, insert 'person with disability' or 'person of minority' into his statements instead of women, and challenge away.

Pallisers · 26/02/2017 16:31

He is a pillock. and quite likely one of those men who says "I'm not sexist in the least but ... "

I would have used his comment about things involving strength being better for men as a starting point of discussion with the pupils "well anyone want to address Gary's statement - do you think it is accurate?"

For the Helen of Troy comment I would have suggested he read his classics more attentively and also review the meanings of the words "cause of" and "started".

I would have spoken to him afterwards about the comment about women's qualifications and told him that it was inappropriate for him to single out one group as needing qualifications over another (if he had said this about say black people, how would that have sounded).

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