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Original poster

Please help me to not hate men

307 replies

LastGirlOnTheLeft · 21/01/2017 23:57

I have a wonderful dad and husband. I have sons, and I love them all to pieces. But I do believe that I am starting to hate men. When I read about their abuse of women and children and animals as well, I really feel HATE!!

SadSadSadI don't want to hate them. I don't want to be anything like those god awful woman haters, those soulless losers who obsess over women and who are lost, probably forever. I am NOT like them, because I do feel love and like for the men in my life. Just no other man.

Any advice?

OP posts:
HelenDenver · 22/01/2017 00:42

Op

There was a long and thoughtful thread on this a few months ago. I'm going to look for it.

ScarlettR · 22/01/2017 00:35

Brokenbiscuit is absolutely right. These two things are very different but are so often confused (in many different scenarios not just this one).

If 99% of cases of tintin's disease in children (that's a made up disease - i hope) have a red rash does that mean that 99% of children with a red rash have tintin's disease? No, of course it doesn't and hopefully it's quite clear to see why not in that example.

Being a man doesn't make you an abuser. Yes, maybe the are reasons why abusers are more men but that doesn't mean all men should be hated. As others have said, focus your hate on the abusers

Brokenbiscuit · 22/01/2017 00:11

The vast majority of abusers might be men.

That doesn't mean that the vast majority of men are abusers.

Most of them are quite nice, actually.

ScruffyTheJanitor · 22/01/2017 00:07

No it isn't.

A man can abuse someone.
A man can kick a dog
A man can murder you.

Its not 'men' its a man.

What you're saying is a bit like me saying,
"I hate women because they only ever think about shoes"

Or,
"I hate all women because that one sick fucker who left her rottweiler to starve to death"
"I hate all women because of that one who worked in a nursery and allowed her husband to buses kids in her care"
"I hate every woman on the planet because one of them allowed that singer to abuse her kids"

Its nonsensical, unfair, sexist, ridiculous.

annandale · 22/01/2017 00:05

Hating abuse is fine though.

I would say, focus on the people around you who you know are good people. Maybe do something new, a class or sport or volunteering where you meet more nice people.

Original poster
LastGirlOnTheLeft · 22/01/2017 00:02

But it is men who are the vast majority of abusers!!!! So it is obviously gendered!!

OP posts:
ScruffyTheJanitor · 22/01/2017 00:00

Instead of hating 'men' you shoiukd hate abusers of people and animals, no matter what they have between their legs.

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