Transgender Documentary on BBC2 Thursday 2100 "Transgender Kids: Who Knows best?"

Fantastic, Fish! Well done.

I sent an essay email off to them outlining my experiences from right when this started to now. Everything about the schools approach, the doctors, the mental health people, the gender clinics. How things were when we started compared to now and about the encouragement my child is getting from every professional they meet.

I'll let you know if/when I get a response from them.

Total unquestioning acceptance of everyone sounds great on the surface, but it's the unquestioning acceptance that is harming my child and looks set to harm a lot of others too. Absolutely terrifying.

I really agree with Prawn, Fish. As she said, they can't just dismiss your experience out of hand.

Well, I do think it's worth trying an email to the RCGP, Fish, because you know of what you speak - they can't just write you off as an activist - you're a concerned parent who feels her child is being badly let down by the NHS.

Prawn and Devi thanks for the advice. Unfortunatly I live in the back of beyond so counsellors of any type are few and far between. I'll definitely have a look down those routes though, I also got sent a link for someone who may be able to help me find someone neutral, so I'll be calling them later.

Two I had never heard of her before but just watched 3 of her videos. She is pretty awesome.

The experience that I am having with my child is so far removed from what I read about more often than not. For us it has never been about hobbies and likes/dislikes. My child still loves a wide range of activities, still wears neutral tracksuits, has never been limited in colours or toys at all, just as my other children haven't, my daughters are just as happy to shop in the boys section as the girls and have never questioned their identity at all.

My child has real issues with their body, they feel physically wrong. It's not a case of I like pink or blue and therefore I am a girl/boy. They feel so uncomfortable and unhappy with their body. It's basically body dysmorphia.

The new wave of transgender children I see are pretty much all basing their feelings on their likes and dislikes and it's terrifying. Terrifying that people, children are being encouraged down this path, which is so very difficult, based on a few toys they want to play with.

I wouldn't wish what my child is going through on anyone.

I'm going on to have a read of that thread now Prawn and will definitely send an email if you think it will help.

I agree with you Albadross on the stigmatisation of mental health. I think it's particularly worrying when you consider the high levels of co-morbidity amongst trans people and the fact that the prevalence of autism is significantly higher too.

So not only is it offensive, but it will probably lead to people writing off problems as being trans-related and not seeking help for genuine mental health problems. This may go some way to explaining why levels of suicide remain high for post-operative transpeople, who not only will have gone through a traumatic operation, but are likely to see the end of any counselling they receive as the assumption is they've been "cured".

It is a very good point. The thing is, as I see it, the category "transgender" as it is now understood also includes "non binary" which I think is mostly special snowflake look at my identiteee bullshit, and a large number of men expressing clearly what has been identified as autogynephilia, which is a sexual fetish so I don't think would necessarily be classed as a mental health condition. I think the amount of people with gender dysphoria is quite small as a part of this larger group.

I would agree that gender dysphoria is clearly a mental health condition and should be treated as such, whatever the agreed treatment.

I also think there are a lot of other personality disorders like narcissism and histrionic personality disorder within this larger group - I would imagine higher than the general population. A lot of the rhetoric just comes across to me as pure narcissistic rage (and I believe I have personal experience of narcissistic men). And it seems to me that they've bound up so much of their identity into the fight to be recognised as women and force themselves into their spaces that they take it as a personal wound when people deny this.

That's just my thoughts, I am not a psychiatrist!

I would have started the post with your name if it was "aimed" at you. Now you understood that it wasn't. It's time to move on.

It's not "aimed" at you. This isn't about you.

I took one line from your post and elaborated on it. People do that on here.

"being a boy and liking dolls is not a mental health issue"

No, but being a boy but thinking you are a girl, wanting your penis cut off etc is probably a mental health issue.

What you are talking about it GENDER, and there is nothing wrong with people of either sex wanting to act outside of their gender expectations.

What trans movement is about is SEX, and there is a lot wrong with people thinking they are something they physically are not, and wanting to surgically modify their bodies to mimic the other sex.

When painfully thin anorexics think they are fat (something they are physically not) and want to modify their bodies to fit an incorrect mental picture, we don't help them diet. We try to help them solve the conflict between their perception and their reality.

When people with Body Integrity Identity Disorder sincerely believe one of their limbs is too much for their bodies, causing them great distress, we don't hack it off for them and wave them off happily hopping on one leg. As with anorexics, we try to help them psychologically, to resolve the conflict between their mind's perception and their physical reality.

Albadross ^Yet again as a woman with not only a mental illness, but probably a neurodiverse condition, I'm the person nobody wants to be.6

I'm in the same boat, but its ok - I've decided to identify as sane.

Albadross I wanted to post similar sentiments about mental health.
How dare they further stigmatise yet another vulnerable population?
It's fucking insulting.
I haven't seen any discussion about this aspect of the trans activists' tactics.
Such a nasty cheap shot, but using such snide tactics is unsurprising within the current TA creed.

I think suicide rates are rather high in people with MH problems too

I'm still RTFT so maybe this has already come up, but why does nobody ever point out how the trans mob talk about mental illness in such a stigmatising way? 25% of the population experiences it, yet we don't go around insisting people call themselves 'cis-mental' (sorry I can't think what the equivalent would be). It's as if being mentally ill is 'the worst thing ever' and how dare you even suggest such a thing! But the key difference is that to be homosexual you don't need medical intervention, or different clothes or other external representations of self. To change gender, you do (unless you're Danielle Muscato).

Most people accept that things you require medical intervention for are atypical in some way, yet you don't see this being discussed at all when it comes to mental health. Yet again as a woman with not only a mental illness, but probably a neurodiverse condition, I'm the person nobody wants to be.

fish have you thought about seeing a clinical psychologist in private practice? My experience is clinical psychologists have a wider knowledge of the causes of issues and techniques that work than counsellors.

@fish

Have you watched any of Magdalen Berns' videos on YouTube? They might make you smile!

You've probably thought of all the angles but I wonder whether looking for a feminist leaning counsellor might help regardless of the sex of your DC. I know Gender Critical Dad, the blogger, says that feminist analysis is the only thing that made sense of what was going on. Also you could try asking for help on 4thwavenow or the gender critical health professionals website.

The RCGP document isn't very long but it doesn't address problems like yours and your DC at all. They ought to know how bleak it is struggling alone and that this is the position for any parent who won't follow the Mermaids line.

GPs are very reasonable and approachable as a group (I used to work with them) and I think the College might be interested in feedback.

The RCGP are about as representative of ordinary GPs as any political party is of the beliefs of all the citizens of the country. Increasing numbers of GPs are resigning their membership precisely because of their stupid, unthinking pronouncements on all sorts of things. I have no direct experience of GID children or adults professionally but I think many GPs would be very worried about the idea of our patients being given puberty blockers etc without regard for the long term effects.
Cool's perspective on thinking of gender identity in the wider context of personality is interesting. Children, by definition, cannot be diagnosed with a personality disorder precisely because their personality is not fully formed until adulthood. For me that makes the current gender affirmative approach completely at odds with the management of other psychological problems.

Thanks Prawn

Cool, I would like ongoing support, not to be pushed into an all or nothing scenario. I'm lucky that my child hasn't self harmed or had suicidal thoughts, I can only imagine that had been the case I may well have been so desperate for support that blockers would have been the only option.

I would also like support from the school, as it is they can't really support my child's needs as they now have an agenda to push where they have to be inclusive regardless of the best interests of my child and the other children in the school.

It seems that everyone now has to be 100% inclusive of trans people, which sounds great in theory, in reality it is causing a lot of trouble and is detrimental to everyone.

I have now managed to get myself into a position to pay for an hours counselling a week for my child, finding a counsellor is proving very difficult though because everyone I meet on a professional level (including the NHS counsellors and the clinic staff) are supportive to the point of encouraging.

It's here link. Sorry, should have provided it in my original post.