Come on Danielle, woman up! Growing your hair is free! That would at least be a nod in the right direction. Drop a couple of bucks on a razor, get yourself a drapey scarf and some earrings, and you're away!
Danielle is quite active in atheist circles. Sadly, this has led me to believe that Danielle is not on the wind up. Frighteningly sincere, or playing a really, really long and twisted game.