Trans media watch are lobbying mnhq

Monkey, what an awful situation

I'm shocked but I'm not surprised that this kind of thing is happening. I hope that enough disgruntled parents can get together to force a change. Those poor girls. Like it's not hard enough being a teenage girl, without having to deal with stuff like this - we shouldn't be asking our children to navigate these kinds of issues. I really hope those involved can find a way forward.

OK sorry for delay in update, had to consider how I put this for privacy reasons as I am sure this is a fairly unique situation right now.

Basically conversation went down the liens of

Teacher: We have an obligation to make all pupils comfortable and to respect the wishes of children who are different who are often bullied more than others
Parent: But what about other children feeling comfortable? I think the fact that this child is known to act inappropriately towards females at school should have been considered
Teacher: The pupil has been feeling uncomfortable in herself for a long time and we have assurance from their parents that the behavior was due to jealousy rather than attraction (?!)
Parent: Thats nice, but cannot be proven. I really think some other arrangement should be made here
Teacher: Like what?
Parent: The pupil could use staff facilities instead of a load of girls having to instead if using the males makes them uncomfortable (new trans case so maybe this should be clear already, but the only change has been the pupil wears skirts sometimes instead of pants...thats literally it)
Teacher: That would not be inclusive. Which goes against our school policy

And so on. Basically head against wall situation. Parent was also accused of 'targeting' child as there have been 'many other' complaints of the same nature so naturally it is assumed that the parents have all ganged up to be horrible to the child instead of people having genuine concerns.

Uncomfortable girls now have permission to use staff room to change. However according to DSD this is about 10 of them :/ And I can't see how this will work if a teacher wants to use the staff room too.

Uncomfortable children can also use the staff loos.

But this child is to do PE with the girls (they are usually separated by sex)

Teachers 'will keep an eye' out for bullying because of this situation but seem to be not taking it very seriously and are more concerned about bullying of the trans child.

So yeah. Fuck this. Her mother is considering other school options. Going to meetup with other dissatisfied parents and see if its possible to move all the children to the same school (so they don't all have to start over...) but not sure how successful this will be. I didn't know you could just change a childs school for 'no reason' which this will probably be put down as.

That's awful, monkey. I'm so sorry. Best of luck with it - it's just a crazy thing to have to be concerned about.

That article makes me want to cry, prawn. The boundaries of women and girls mean nothing any more. Silly little females, making such a fuss about a bit of penis. Jesus. Welcome to the future.

Had a text earlier on...DHs ex is not happy but didn't go into details. She's coming to discuss it tomorrow with us. Seems serious :/

Will update as much as I can without outing myself/her/DSD

I had a convo with a friend and her son yesterday. Her son has a ftm in his year group. Apparently she is allowed to define what sex/ gender she "feelz" on a daily basis ie one day female,another a male. One day a dress , next day trousers. Clothing is not an issue as there is not a strict uniform policy .However depending on how what "gender" she feels that day will change for PE etc in her preferred changing room. The boys are in uproar and have complained but what really gets them inflamed is that she chooses which side she plays on depending on fixtures . She is a cox so knocks out the male cox if chooses to join the male team.
a cox BUT will choose to play for the girls if a perceived better competition. The school allows this. Both teams dislike the individual.

Monkey

It sounds like a complete nightmare. Poor you and DSD. I've said it before, but I'm so thankful that both my children are past all this. I'm hoping that by the time they present me with grandchildren (not yet, please) someone, somewhere will have seen some sense.

But I'm not holding my breath.

I echo previous posters advice, to have in writing how they are going to safeguard your DSD.

Seemingly nothing. I expect DHs ex will bring that up too, though I do know parents have complained before about it (before this 'identification' malarky) and been told that the lad has had detentions for his behavior, and is being closely watched. That seems to be about it..

Do they not have safeguarding requirements here? If he's been punished before for assaulting girls (because that's what groping is), what measures have they put in place to ensure the safety of the girls?

She is obviously more worried about the other kids picking on her (and some friends) but to me...it seems the teachers are encouraging this? Assuming we have the whole story of course.

Your poor DSD, that is awful.

Not sure if I dare brave AIBU..especially with 'another trans thread'

Theres not much can be done I don't think..sat waiting for call off DHs ex now to see where the meeting has gone.

It all seems so real all of a sudden

Yes, I still the the vast majority of folk have no idea about all this - what the trans lobby wants and is getting.

I'd post it in AIBU for traffic, Monkey'if I were you. A lot of parents would be interested.

Here it is.

And here's the original article (the first one is a commentary and the second.)

That's appalling, Monkey. Another Lila Perry in the making, it seems.

There's an article I've just seen on an American news site which says girls must get used to male genitals in their spaces. It's a civil rights matter, apparently.

I'll try and find it. Think it's in a Charlottesville paper.

This was meant to be elsewhere, but I guess it fits here too :/

This was one of those...'it wont affect me but I will fight for those it will affect' things. Until last week. DSD came in from school in tears as her and a few friends are being bullied for being 'transphobic'. The whole situation seems insane. Basically a guy in her class now 'identifies' as a girl. This guy has been trouble since he started at that school (she is y7 so they only started there after the 6 weeks holidays). He is known for being pervy and has been in serious trouble a few times for groping the girls in his class. Apparently they were told this guy would now be changing with them and such. So her and a few friends spoke up. Apparently (and I have no proof of this mind, just DSDs word..though I don't see why she would lie) they spoke to the teacher in private too and that afternoon their music practice was cancelled and a 'tolerance' hour scheduled instead?! Which from the sounds of it was a passive aggressive move against the girls who (rightly) were worried about the situation.

We don't know what the fuck to do. DSDs mother has written a note to excuse her from PE today and Friday. But she says she is scared to even go to the loo at school. Her mother has a meeting tonight where she is going to ask if DSD (and other girls who feel uncomfortable) can use the staff facilities but I have an idea where that one will be going...

Honestly, I can see this resulting in her having to change schools :/

I have a huge issue with the unnecessary complication in her life that my DD aged 15 might have before she finishes up in high school, where she may be required to disrobe and shower in a locker room in front of someone with a penis. It is my opinion that it should be up to her to decide when or if she does that, not the decision of the Department of Justice, enforced by her school administration.

^This x 10
hit the nail on the head Math (and other eloquent posters). How can anyone think this would be acceptable? World's gone mad. R.I.P. women's rights

It wasn't just Caster Semenya in the 800m. It's widely believed that second and third place were taken by intersex/transwomen.

I don't get it either Ontheturningaway . I am concerned that the trans issue may erode services which are already under resourced.

Sorry posted on the wrong thread

What I dont understand is this...
I have mental health issues, very clearly and obviously caused by life experiences. I am treated like scum and have been labelled in damning waysm treated like a nuisance and a waste of time (and if I do end up committing suicide it will be this discrimination and judgement that's done it, not the original problem!). Quite obvious, rational things are treated like bonkers delusions on my part. I am treated like an idiot.

Why then, do people with the mental health issues of thinking they are a woman/man despite demonstrably not being so, have their delusions pandered to so extremely?

I keep reading articles about transgender this year and becoming more and more concerned.

This thread has taught me I'm a second wave feminist and Spartacus!

neurobollocks
Spot on in this context.