A Woman's Hair is her Crown

I don't resent my wife wasting money on her her.

"Wasting" is an interesting choice of word. Is it a waste if it makes her happy and more comfortable with her hair?

Is it "your" money?

Good! There is a compromise between completely shaved and long and hassle creating.
Thing about Afro hair is that even natural Afro hair needs a lot of care. If left to its own devices (just washed and combed ) it will knot, break and turn into dreadlocks.

You don't resent her 'wasting' money? Haha that makes no sense. You clearly do.

Oh I don't do anything with my hair. I just brush it

But even I wouldn't cut it short because that's what I want

Notice how he isn't asking his 6 year old what she wants?

Hair doesn't mean that much to me either sobriquet and I'm female. It's just stuff that grows out of my head. I appreciate that there are some who have problems with thinning hair or hair loss and those who have lost hair through illness. I would expect those people to feel more strongly about it.
I have never cared whether my hair 'fits in' with societal expectations, or cut/coloured it to please anyone else though (once I was permitted, in my late teens to have control over my own follicles).

www.google.co.uk/search?q=teeny+weeny+afro&client=safari&hl=en-gb&prmd=isvn&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwi3z4rM5_DPAhUFBcAKHWgmBZIQ_AUIBygB&biw=375&bih=559#hl=en-gb&tbm=isch&q=teeny+weeny+afro+

You're a black man but you think a little black girl's hair just needs to be washed and combed
Either you're an oblivious idiot who has never paid attention to the women in his life and their hair issues or you're lying about being black. Long Afro hair needs tending.
It would be massively unreasonable to do it behind your wife's back. However I also tend to agree that your daughter is a little girl and shouldn't be burdened with excessive uncomfortable beauty treatments. Would your wife agree to her having a TWA (short Afro)? She could still put bows and things in for special occasions but it would be really easy to care for.

It's clear your a man anyway

Hair means nothing to you and you want to seem to prove a point.

Do you resent your wife spending money generally, or just on her hair?

Oh, do I. Oh dear. There goes my self-esteem. And thanks for the PM.

I don't believe that you are doing this in the best interests of your daughter. More to prove some sort of point (to your wife, DD, us, whatever).

You sound like you want to use your daughter to express your distaste at the amount of time and money your wife spends on her hair. Not cool.

Please note taht any opinions I may express could be affected by the fact that as a child I was told that "a woman's hair is her crowning glory" - with the implication that if I didn't have sensible, shiny, long hair in its natural colour and form, then I was not worthy of male attention.

I think that teaching a girl to invest too much self-worth in hair isn't a good thing. I think that long hair is a problem, and that if a girl is having to spend hours having her hair styled and combed when she could be playing that is a great pity. I think that short hair on girls is just fine - in fact DS2's best mate's older sister is a mixed race girl of about 6, and her, her little brother and her mother all have short hair, and they're all perfectly happy about it (obviously)

HOWEVER. I am not your wife. She clearly has strong feelings about this, no-matter what your daughters feelings are, you shouldn't just unilaterally cut her hair.

What you can do is make sure that you do your best to ensure that your daughter knows that her hair is just hair, and it's not an important part of who she is.

I don't think you should cut it whilst your wife is out - that would definitely cause a problem. However, I also dislike the notion that women are viewed by the style of their hair/conformity, and te notion that little girls have their hair styled by their mothers in styles that the mother wishes to impose.

Give that you daughter is 6, she will have opinions of her own. If she wants it short, then perhaps go for shorter, but not a buzz cut/no.1. If she doesn't like it, she can grow it out.

Saying all that, the females I know of Afro-Caribbean heritage do spend a lot of time & money on their hair. One of my friends used to change her hair monthly - it would be completely different across the seasons.

Assuming that you're genuine have you thought about the repercussions if your daughter doesn't like it? It will take months to grow back & will go through some really awkward stages, does she understand that? People are going to assume you've shaved her head for medical reasons, are you prepared for others assumptions? Is it going to cause problems at school with their uniform policy?

You don't believe that at your DD's age there is any price to pay later. I presume you mean consequences in terms of life choices or effects on her self esteem etc. Not necessarily so. My mum made me have very hort hair (not a buzz cut, admittedly), as a child. I grew it as soon as she deemed me old enough to take care of it myself, & spent most of my teens & 20s with extremely long hair - between waist length & mid thigh length. I have to have it short now for medical reasons & frankly I'm gutted. Don't underestimate the power of choice, or lack of it, on your DD's self esteem.

I am tempted to cut it when she goes out the house, but it would lead to a full blown argument on her return (God forbid possibly a domestic strike!).

You're sounding like a bit of an arse.

All little girls seem to have long hair these days. In fact even when I was at school in the 80s I felt different at the age of 6 because I didn't have long straight hair like all the other girls. If you cut your daughter's hair short you could be making her life at school more difficult. Sad but true.

OP "Most Men don't even pay that much attention to a woman's hair as long as it's washed and combed. "

I shudder to think how you are raising your kids if that's a factor in your thinking.

Washed and combed? Lol you clearly have no idea about your daughters hair and its needs.

I do agree with you in terms of... she should not grow up feeling that her hair always has to be plaited or weaved. Because in effect that's telling her that her natural hair is not good enough without having to 'do' something to it.

But a number 1? Really? Surely you're taking the piss here.

At her age she does not understand the after effects... my daughter desperately wanted a 'bob' until I explained that with her Afro curls it would stick out sideways more than down to a line. She quickly changed her mind

A good compromise would be to have her curls (doesn't matter if they are super tight or very loose) cut into layers and then she can wear her hair out or with a hair clip/ headband thus negating the need to 'do' anything time consuming or costly to it.