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Original poster

" if they dont want us to look why do they dress like that? "

26 replies

whydidhesaythat · 02/06/2016 23:15

stupid newcomer here....( not a troll, not a bloke)

the quote above is from my father in law.

I actually don't have an answer. Certainly as a young woman I "dressed like that" because I wanted to be desired. Now I withdraw my eyes from beautiful young girls' boobs when they sit down next to me on the train.... and I'd find them very distracting if meeting professionally... And would probably take the individual less seriously

does anyone have the patience to explain a feminist take on this? Please don't slam me I am genuinely confused.

OP posts:
ToffeePenny · 03/06/2016 00:08

Initial thoughts until one of the proper lot comes along (this is posted in theories and traffic here can be a little slow)

  1. Because they like the way they look and it makes them happy
  2. Because wanting to look a way that makes you happy is fine
  3. Because it would be boring to only dress in Jesus sandles/wellies/plimsolls/brogues, baggy sweaters/t-shirts/fleeces/jacket, Bermuda shorts/chinos/galoshes/sensible trousers (delete as appropriate for the weather and place) throughout your entire life
  4. Because fashion doesn't always sit the same way on every body shape (cf big norks vs every 'professional-looking' blouse ever invented or chunky thighs vs smart fitted skirt suits with the slit)
  5. Because pulling off the 'invisible ninja' look is actually quite difficult and every outfit risks attracting a 'look' of some description.
  6. Because 'they' are actually individuals, dressing for a myriad of their own reasons, with a very very low probability of there being any chance that it is intended for the individuals your fil believes make up 'us'.

2 odd things stand out though from your post - that you, 'not a bloke', notice their norks at all when they sit next to, not opposite, you, let alone to the extent to be able to 'withdraw your eyes'. I barely notice my own and they are centimetres away. Are they wearing neon lights on them?

Secondly that your father in law feels that you, 'not a bloke' would understand the view from the point of the 'us' and not feel part of the 'they' and so feel excluded or pressured by his comment. What on earth is wrong with the man?

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