Who is the main driver in your relationship? You or DP?

We only have one car and I drive it to work Monday to Friday, whereas DH works from home. He rarely goes out on week nights, so he drives at the weekend as it really is the only opportunity for him to do so. We take it in turns to be the designated driver, although I am currently on maternity leave and breastfeeding so barely drinking anything so I'm banking a lot of designated driver chips at the moment which I will cash in later.

If we're together, I drive 90% of the time. We're generally in my car as all the kids don't fit in his, so I drive. We're both equally happy being driven by the other one though, there's none of this nonsense commenting on the others driving. I see it in other relationships though, my mum has never driven a car with my dad in, despite driving for 40 odd years.

DH will drive 99% of the time.

He enjoys driving. I don't, particularly.

I also drive x5 times a week to work, whereas he gets the bus.

I drive 80% of the time. Mostly because I drop DH at work so I can have the car. If we are going on a longer journey 30mins+ then we usually take turns on either leg.

DH always drives unless we're out and want to drink in which case we take it in turns. I drive a lot for work and don't really enjoy it that much (and he always tells me what to do when I'm driving) whereas he walks to work and loves driving. So it works for us

Interesting question. My DH does tend to drive if we're both in the car as he gets travel sick,so although he was keen for me to learn to drive so that I could share the driving it hasn't really worked out how he hoped!

I'm often the driver when we go out though as I don't often drink and I will generally do local driving and school runs when we're together as I'm more used to it. He's just not assertive enough for the dog eat dog of the school run where you have to sieze that gap or wait another half an hour!

99% of the time it's DH - it's not a feminist issue, he knows I wear the trousers

I reckon that as I do all the "getting things ready to go," then he should do the driving so I get a chance to relax.

I drive a lot more in the week as I take the DCs to nursery and myself to work by car while DH commutes by train, so if we go out as a family I am over driving and he wants a go (he likes it more than me too, but it's more extreme at the moment with me always driving to work and him never). If he's feeling ill or (rarely these days) we're out at night and he's drinking then it's me. If it's a longer journey we share by distance/time.

If one of us is being dropped off somewhere we would never switch over at the drop off point. That would be crazy. Unless we thought of the drop off on the way there, or one of us had some really urgent internet business or calls to make while we drove.

If the dog comes with us we go in my car as dog not allowed in his car, so I drive.

If dog not coming we will go in his car as better fuel economy so he drives.

Me, most of the time. He's a better navigator by far, and I have way more driving experience (10+ years in hijack-central Johannesburg!) and am more comfortable with our heavy tank of a car. I think he'd drive more if he hated the car less.

I am the driver, whether it's my car or DHs. I love driving and DH loves napping in the car so it works out well!

I do most of the driving when we're both in the car. No major reason, I drove before DH, pay for the car and I really love driving. He is happy to be the passenger and look at the view!
A friend asked me once, how did DH feel with me always taking the wheel? (An indication into her relationship/driving situation!)
I said it wasn't ever an issue, but said I would have been very annoyed if, when he finally passed his test, he'd expected me to hand over the car keys just because he's male, considering the difference in our driving experience and my obvious enjoyment. Thankfully, DH has never played the penis card!

I've posted this once before a couple of years ago but seems appropriate to post it again.

I used to commute to London by train. I would notice how, in the morning the man would drive with his partner in the passenger seat. The man would jump out and go for the train and the woman would get out of the passenger seat and into the driver's seat.

In the evening the reverse would happen. The woman would drive up to the station, jump out and get in the passenger seat and the man would get in the driving seat.

WTF is that all about?

By contrast if the woman was being dropped off at the station the man would be in the driving seat arriving and departing.

It was in the 90s though so maybe everyone is a bit more grown up now.

Anyone else notice this phenomenon more recently?

I dislike driving unless I am on my own.
DH is a terrible passenger, so it works for us that he drives.
I do worry slightly that I am modelling a sexist set up to the DC. However it doesn't bother me enough to actually drive...

Always him unless he's been drinking. I'm bf so always sober. We've just got in and as I was reversing into the drive found myself muttering 'I bloody hate doing this with you in the car!' He'd never dare say anything but I know he thinks I'm going to do it wrong. It was a perfect park btw!

Me, as Dp cannot drive.
However people always assume he is driving, if for example they ask about the journey when we arrive somewhere.
It is definitely a 'man / woman' issue, all these men who can't bear being driven by their partners.

In surveys something like 99% of men say they are 'better than average' as drivers, whereas equal numbers of women say they are 'better than average' 'average' or 'less good than average' as drivers.

I don't love driving, but I guess I am still a relatively new driver, where as dh has been driving for 13 years or so. We are driving down to Minehead next week (8 hours) so we are going to share it which I'm not looking forward to lol

DH likes driving more than I do so I'm happy to let him. I pull him up if he comments on my driving as I find it incredibly annoying.

Pretty much 50/50. If we go out for a meal though I will drive home as he loves a drink with the meal and I couldn't care less about alcohol.

The problem comes when we are in a strange place as he can't tell his left from his right. So if I am navigating and say turn right he is just as likely to turn left (I have to do an exaggerated pointy motion in front of his nose to show him which is right). It's even worse if he is navigating though because he might say turn right when he means turn left and a pointy motion then is no help at all. 'Tis most discombobulating.

DH does 100% of the driving and I'm perfectly happy and grateful for that. I can't drive. I used to drive then realised I'm really crap at it and safer off the road. Not a feminist issue for us (unless it counts that I am exercising my decision etc etc) , just a practical and considerate arrangement.

I'm used to the following phrases-

You just need a refresher.
You just need to get your confidence back.
You'll feel so much more independent
Etc.

If DH is away, there is more than enough public transport or Shank's pony.

If we're together I drive. However he often parks when we get there as I'm truly awful at parking, v poor spatial awareness. The kids say 'mum's a better driver and dad's better at parking'.

I'm the driver as DH hasn't passed his test yet (if ever). I spent a long time getting pissed off that I had to do all the driving (and I too came from a family where all men drove & were the main drivers so it was weird to me when I met him that he didn't drive) but then came to realise that a) he does all the cooking b) he's good at cleaning and c) great at looking after DS - has much more patience than me.

So I'm OK with him not driving now, as it suits me! I just wish I could have a drink when we go out sometimes!!

It depends whose car we're in. DP has the nicer car so we probably go out together in his more often, so he drives.

But if we go in my car then I'll drive.

With my parents, my dad always drives, even if they're both in my mum's car. Although my mum doesn't like driving.

Equal to a degree. If I am not well dh will drive. But quite often I am happy to drive. He drives all day as part of his job so he does like to be chauffeured at nights.