"If I could I would slap her"

What a strange thread. Of course the "wanting to slap" comment was sexist. If OP'd been male, he'd probably have used the phrase "punched his lights out". Unless he's from round here in which case the phrase "giving someone a slap" means punching someone.

Oh, and feminism is about women's liberation from patriarchy.

HTH

Jann.... do try RTFT before you comment. That's not what the OP thinks at all. Nice try though

FrustratedFeminist I have not read all the comments, you seemed to be getting some nasty and unnecessary ones. I think you sound very kind to make a journey of several miles and two train journeys at night (not something I would do as I am a scardy traveller!). I am not sure why the whole thing escalated and it is a shame and I hope you and your sister have made up. Next time, in your shoes, I would post the parcel.

For what it is worth I think the man's comments were sexist and to be honest what is a few minutes disturbance at night in halls. When I was in halls people were fridge raiding and running about at all hours!

No, censored swearing isn't allowed, you must use the whole rude word. Them's the rules.

The real reason why your stars didn't appear is that the rather basic formatting on this site uses them to indicate bold text. If there's nothing between them there's nothing to embolden, hence why nothing appeared. You'd need to use a different symbol, one that isn't used for formatting. # might do it, or @.

Could you clarify what the "sexism and misogyny card" is please pejecod?

I think your sister sounds awful OP

You took her a goody parcel, she got cross with you, made you stay, got crosser over your phone light and confiscated your phone??

I would have lamped my sister, if she treated me like this!!

Is she a bit disturbed/highly strung/aggressive??

There should be stars after the word complete in my last post btw, but it looks like censored swearing isn't even allowed.

Let me see if I've got this right...

-OP makes a racket in early hours and wakes neighbour.

-Neighbour says "if I could I would slap her" in response.

-OP plays the "sexism" and "misoygny" card.

This isn't "sexism" or "misogyny" at all. If you disturb people's sleep they aren't going to be happy regardless if you're male, female or other gender. Take off your feminist-tinted glasses and take a good look at yourself instead of crying "sexism" everytime someone isn't happy at you.

This has nothing to do with your gender and everything to do with you being a complete in the middle of the night.

That AskBasil eh ? - what a know all.

Yes Lass, I know you think not everything is a feminist issue and feminists have a tendency to see sexism where it isn't because we've nothing better to do.

And I know you think your opinion is as valid as mine.

Ho hum indeed Basil. Not everything is a feminist issue and I do think there is a tendency to see sexism in everything

My opinion is as valid as yours .

"it is not in the spirit of the board for us to victimise like this to prove a point."

Ah but it's exactly the spirit of some of the people who only ever come to this board in order to declare that something an OP wants to discuss from a feminist angle, isn't a feminist issue, or that an OP is over-reacting and seeing sexism where it doesn't exist, or that everyone is over-thinking things because under-thinking them is much better.

Ho hum.

Before your first post on the thread, OP admitted several times that she was wrong, Lass.

You ignored that, berated her for her original post then out of the blue, accused her of not caring about a rape victim. Unsurprisingly, that upset her.

Then you wait a few days and summarise her upset response as her saying you were "letting down the sisterhood", whilst completely missing out of that summary your own behaviour.

The OP had a noisy row with her sister , who then continued to stir things by reporting the next morning what a third party said but which were not said directly to the OP. It was not a feminist issue.

Whilst this was being discussed another thread about a horrific incident which is a feminist issue and a gross abuse of human rights was being largely ignored.

The OP decided there had been a "misogynistic insult" ; decided to make a big play of the reference to "slapping" which several posters agreed was not meant literally. OP had not apparently even considered apologising to the people she disturbed. In fact she chose to play that down because it was the weekend.

OP posted "victimisation occurs on all levels, and can be minor too!!" .

The OP was not victimised except possibly by her sister needling her by passing on the remark.

To clarify it is not so much that I agree with what the OP has to say. I do to an extent (particularly OP's later posts) and although I don't so much agree with the hyperbolic opening post, I think she has received unfair treatment from a select few here.

I've come late to the party but Yonic's enlightening summary has motivated me to read through this thread in one go, and now, well, I'm a bit and about much of the reaction the OP has faced here. This isn't representative of MN at all (or at least my own experiences here!)

Some posters have tried to see OP's side or at least not 'attack' her for her obvious mishandling of the situation. Other almost seem to be gloating about the fact she was called this by essentially goading her into an argument of some sort... Hope I'm wrong.

Whatever the rights and wrongs of the OP's situations are (and indeed it is clear she is not trying to equate herself to a hard done-by victim of horrific sexism, at least in her later posts) it is not in the spirit of the board for us to victimise like this to prove a point. There are other ways of letting a poster know you do not agree with what they have to say.

To summarise that exchange as "OP told me off for letting the sisterhood down because I didn't agree with her. " is a biased summary.

To quote:

19/05/2015 15:38 LassUnparalleled

And I note that despite having the word "feminist " in your name you haven't commented on the thread about the Paraguayan rape victim. The idea that you have been a victim of sexism/misogyny is laughable.

19/05/2015 16:05 FrustratedFeminist

Lassunparalleled. What an unbelievable thing to say. If you bothered to search my posts you would see that I have namechanged - how do you know that I haven't contributed on that thread?

How am I trying to minimise my behaviour? I have accepted that I am in the wrong and added the weekend detail to show that I at least had good intentions even if (as I fully admit) I obviously did not think about things properly; but I am trying to get across that in any case its unacceptable that anyone should threaten anyone like that. The feminist undertone to this occurs because he is a man using violence in connection with a woman, do you understand? If I had said that to him, I somehow doubt I would have emerged from the situation unscathed.

Feminism/victimisation occurs on all levels, and can be minor too!! When did I ever compare my plight to that of the Paraguayan rape victim??? When did I even use the word victim???? Take a look at yourself Lass and stop throwing around unfounded accusations.

19/05/2015 16:10 cogitosum

Saying that you can't care about low level everyday sexism when there are bigger issues is a common argument used by mysoginists

19/05/2015 16:36 LassUnparalleled

You are trying to conflate an everyday off the cuff used by men and women in a hyperbolic sense with no intent to carry it through as victimisation. You weren't even there.

It has nothing to do with everyday sexism. Ive said it about people who annoy me, other posters have too.

19/05/2015 16:43 FrustratedFeminist

Youre a credit to the sisterhood Lass. How dare you turn this into a personal attack by claiming that because I superficially dont seem to care about a Paraguayan rape victim's plight (which I obviously do btw), I am in some way minimising "real sexism"...

Lass, the OP's response to you was after your post implying she didn't care about a victim of rape in Paraguay. Be fair.

At least one female poster said they felt like slapping her too. I doubt she meant it any more than this bloke did.

OP told me off for letting the sisterhood down because I didn't agree with her.

Seems to have escaped her attention the only person who was actually violent to her was her own sister literally on the night and then emotionally the next day in pointlessly (or perhaps to emphasise just how annoying OP's behaviour had been?) telling her about this remark.

I haven't posted on the sisters thread. I don't have a sister and there is one person in the world to whom I am a sister.