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Original poster

teenage girls under massive pressure to do anal :(

257 replies

GinAndSonic · 23/04/2015 12:05

Article may upset some people. Saw this www.telegraph.co.uk/women/mother-tongue/11554595/Pornography-has-changed-the-landscape-of-adolescence-beyond-all-recognition.html in chat and thought it was something important to discuss, in particular this about teenages and anal Sex - "Moreover, both genders expected males to find pleasure in the act whereas females were mostly expected to “endure the negative aspects such as pain or a damaged reputation”."

Im not surprised by this sadly, as i was anally raped by my boyfriend as a teen over 10 years ago and pornification is only getting worse. What can we do, other thab talk to our kids? Can we do anything on a bigger scale to fix the problem, not just try to help our kids survive the shit storm?

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INickedAName · 30/04/2015 10:50

cheerful I'm so sorry you were raped. Flowers Fwiw I think it's natural to feel how you do, pregnancy hormones or not.

loop have you actually read the article that this thread is about? If not, I think you should, and if you have, I'm genuinely shocked that you feel the examples and the injuries those girls have are preferable to getting pregnant. It doesn't sound like fun at all.

Superexcited · 30/04/2015 06:54

loop anal sex might be fun for two willing adults who know the risks and understand how to minimise the risks as well as understanding the need for lubrication and foreplay.
Anal sex isn't fun for a teenage girl who is having anal sex with a boy who thinks he can just ram his penis up her arse causing pain and possibly irreversible damage.
Do you really think all those girls who end up in A&E each year with anal damage find the experience fun?

CheerfulYank · 30/04/2015 05:58

My parents have no idea I was raped either.

I don't know what to do or say about any of this, except that I (pregnancy hormones, most likely) just want to lie down and cry.

I've got a seven year old boy and am due in five weeks with another boy, and I worry about them. And I've got a little girl who is almost two and I worry about her most of all.

I don't know what to say. I don't know where to start with any of it.

Original poster
GinAndSonic · 30/04/2015 05:46

I was thinking along the lines that anal sex is fun whereas pregnancy isn't.

Hmm
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PuffinsAreFictitious · 30/04/2015 05:21

I was thinking along the lines that anal sex is fun whereas pregnancy isn't.

Sure you were Confused

Hakluyt · 29/04/2015 23:31

"I was thinking along the lines that anal sex is fun whereas pregnancy isn't."

Not sure thinking actually came into it...........

TheBlackRider · 29/04/2015 23:29

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TheBlackRider · 29/04/2015 23:22

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TheBlackRider · 29/04/2015 23:21

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loopinthep · 29/04/2015 23:10

I was thinking along the lines that anal sex is fun whereas pregnancy isn't.

didyouwritethe · 29/04/2015 23:05

Gin, you are right about STI transmission, including HIV transmission, because viruses go straight into the bloodstream through tears in delicate tissue. Sad

HelenaDove · 29/04/2015 22:49

Gin Thanks

HelenaDove · 29/04/2015 22:47

AF i remember you saying that on another thread a while ago.. Im so sorry you went through that Thanks

Original poster
GinAndSonic · 29/04/2015 22:24

TheBlackRider it does, and im under the impression transmission is more likely due to tearing of the more delicate tissues in that area. I dont know why anyone would suggest that anal is an alternative to prevent pregnancy when condoms are easily obtained for free by teenagers, often from dedicated teen sexual health services that, certainly when i was a teen, had no stigma attached amongst peers.

AF im sorry that you were raped Flowers I also never told my parents, they presumably think i didnt have any terrible experiences when in reality i suffered horribly.

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TheBlackRider · 29/04/2015 21:34

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TheBlackRider · 29/04/2015 21:29

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Original poster
GinAndSonic · 29/04/2015 20:07

loop Its not actually a choice between unprotected vaginal sex or anal sex. And if you really want to get into it, if a penis MUST enter an orifice, the mouth is further from the vagina than the anus, so shed be safer giving and recieving oral. Or, y'know, condoms.

Of course your statement is rediculous in the context of girls being forced or coerced into unsafe anal sex, resulting in traumatic and potentially lifelong injuries.

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PuffinsAreFictitious · 29/04/2015 19:28

I'd rather my daughter had anal sex than got pregnant.

Really?

For all the reasons Superexcited stated.

I'd rather have a pregnant daughter than one with some of the injuries sustained by young women who have engaged in riskier sexual practices without proper information and knowledge.

Abortions are simple enough, repairing a rectal prolapse isn't.

YonicScrewdriver · 29/04/2015 19:11

Would you, loop? It's not either/or...

AnyFucker · 29/04/2015 19:06

loop, that is an idiotic thing to say

Superexcited · 29/04/2015 19:03

loop surely you mean if your daughter is old enough and knowledgeable enough of the risks of having anal sex and that she does it without coercion or pressure?
I wouldn't want a daughter of mine having anal sex when she doesn't know about the risks of anal prolapse or faecal incontinence if the boy doesn't know what he is doing properly. I wouldn't want a pregnant teenage daughter either but it shouldn't be an either / or choice.

loopinthep · 29/04/2015 18:31

I'd rather my daughter had anal sex than got pregnant.

INickedAName · 29/04/2015 17:57

I'm sorry you were raped AF

I can talk to my Mum now, but when I was a teenager, no fucking way, I was really close to my Mum and coukd talk to her about everything but my sexual felling/relationships,she tried chatting to me when I was 16 and had a 17 year old boyfriend, I fobbed her off and told her what she wanted to hear.

Hakluyt · 29/04/2015 17:50

So,people who discovered anal sex all by themselves in the context of a loving and respecful relationship, do you think that your experience will bear any similarity to the experience of a couple who have seen it as it is depicted in free porn?

AnyFucker · 29/04/2015 17:45

I was date raped. My parents do not know that to this day. Very, very naive to imagine your teenagers tell you much of anything at all about their sexual experiences, good and bad

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