People are made to feel shit for all kinds of things it's true.
The difference is in the specific versus the wider cultural norms, the pressures applied, and who is applying the pressure.
It's a bit like when people use the example of the one black man they know who says awful things about white people to say that 'racism works both ways'.
There is a massive difference between an ingrained and pervasive system designed to put down people of colour over hundreds and hundreds of years, and one shitty attitude.
Just as there is a massive difference between some dick telling a thin girl to 'eat a sandwich' and the fact that women have eg been told for decades that to be chubby is to be undesirable, and in fact often, quite disgusting.
Neither example is ok, but they are not at all the same thing.